(no subject)
well that was quick service. as soon as i post this, she e-mails me and tells me i can call her now..well...ok, so its not a "why me? everything sucks" post but its not a "phew" either. i dont really know what i feel exactly. this is where the split logic of my brain comes in...Section One doesnt care if she does other stuff with her friends, i mean it is HER life and im just a visitor in a small section of it. but Section Two says what the hell...im only there for 6 nights and in one phone call lost 2 of them. its a tricky thing. i mean i want her to be happy and keep a normal life and a normal schedule, yet its her that tells me this trip is about me and shes going to spend it with me and then goes and takes 2 of my nights away. granted, she asked me first which was really cool of her but i dunno....what did she expect me to say? to tell her no, she cant do these things? im a dick, but im not an asshole. so i wonder when the 3rd night will be taken away or maybe a couple of days. maybe im overreacting as i often do but i mean...im a total stranger there with no one else around me, which means ill have to spend (at least, at this point) 2 late afternoons and nights totally alone in a place ive never been. fuck, man...i have to do some thinking here. but on the other hand, if we go to all these places i wanted to go, ill be too tired to stay awake by evening anyway, but on the other other hand i CANT make those all day plans since shell be going...AARRRGGGHHHH...i need to just shut my brain off.