(no subject)
so. all moved in blah blah blah.
Emma is also moved in, been sick, and now is going to belleville to meet her "dream guy" who is friends with my friend Ian. Small fuckin world.
My job is the same, band stuff is non-existant. I fear it will be forever.
I've seen a lot of people changing paths in thelast couple of weeks. It troubles and makes me smile at the same time.
I know that, for a lot of people, this big change is the last step before adulthood, in a sense.
Like joel, for example. This is likely his last two years of school, doing what he wants. After this, the rest of his life.
I'm almost heartbroken watching the shift. So many questions. What if's. regrets. memories. smiles. It's really scary to think about.
What if it was me and you, not you and him, or her.
What if.
I know a lot of these people I will rarely speak to again, or at the very least will be more of an internet hello, and a possible "hey, long time no see." in public.
I will miss them.
I wish I could be specific, but really, it's not my style. Any one who really knows me, or reads any of these updates will know that.
I thought that, with the trend of change, there may be some new lights. some new chances.
As of right now, I think this is going to be my last year in ottawa. who knows what could happen before then.
I have been chewed up and spit out by this town in a sense, yet would miss it more then a lot of things.
My intentions for originally moving up here have yet to even come close to me, regardless of whether it was me or otherwise.
Maybe I have bad luck, maybe I am holding myself back, maybe if you had loved me, and you didn't. what the fuck?
I don't even really know what I'm writing anymore.
I haven't read a book in ages.
I haven't written words in even longer.
I'm in a slump.
I'm a whore.
I'll miss you.
Emma is also moved in, been sick, and now is going to belleville to meet her "dream guy" who is friends with my friend Ian. Small fuckin world.
My job is the same, band stuff is non-existant. I fear it will be forever.
I've seen a lot of people changing paths in thelast couple of weeks. It troubles and makes me smile at the same time.
I know that, for a lot of people, this big change is the last step before adulthood, in a sense.
Like joel, for example. This is likely his last two years of school, doing what he wants. After this, the rest of his life.
I'm almost heartbroken watching the shift. So many questions. What if's. regrets. memories. smiles. It's really scary to think about.
What if it was me and you, not you and him, or her.
What if.
I know a lot of these people I will rarely speak to again, or at the very least will be more of an internet hello, and a possible "hey, long time no see." in public.
I will miss them.
I wish I could be specific, but really, it's not my style. Any one who really knows me, or reads any of these updates will know that.
I thought that, with the trend of change, there may be some new lights. some new chances.
As of right now, I think this is going to be my last year in ottawa. who knows what could happen before then.
I have been chewed up and spit out by this town in a sense, yet would miss it more then a lot of things.
My intentions for originally moving up here have yet to even come close to me, regardless of whether it was me or otherwise.
Maybe I have bad luck, maybe I am holding myself back, maybe if you had loved me, and you didn't. what the fuck?
I don't even really know what I'm writing anymore.
I haven't read a book in ages.
I haven't written words in even longer.
I'm in a slump.
I'm a whore.
I'll miss you.