(no subject)
I don't know what to think.
For as long as I can remember, music has been life to me.
I woke up to music, I lived my day with music, and I fell asleep to music.
I'm not the most open minded about it, but I respect music. I cherish it more then people cherish their household pets.
I have been in three serious bands in my life. Dropout, eliote, and coast. All three have taught me, and continue to teach me what music can be.
In dropout I learned my instrument better then I thought I could play it. I learned the basic art of writing songs, and seeing how a band operates. Dropout was basically a vertical learning curve. It was my first band, and I will always cherish that band.
Eliote was me. Plain and simple. It was what I lived for. Everything in my day revolved around that band, and how I could further it. I went through three bass players and 2 drummers. Played almost 80 shows, and spent all my money just to get that name out. I stayed up night after night working and writing songs, trying to book shows, and just anything I could do for that band. It was my life. It took me through 2 hard break-ups, and pushed me to meet some of the best friends I have. It showed me what hard work can do and put more smiles on my face then anything or anyone else I've known or experienced. I knew what failure and success was from that.
Coast is the band I'm currently in. Although personally, it's a step back from where I wanted to be, it's still teaching me more then I could ever want. I know how to work with a second guitarist, listen to other bandmates, and let go of taking responsibility. But, in the long run, this band is very empty. It doesn't make me happy, and I find myself not enjoying music as much as I thought I would.
Has coast caused me to loose the passion I once had?
I am troubled by the way I've been feeling towards music lately. I have recently been exposed to some of the most inspiring music I've ever heard, I've been to many live shows and felt that feeling. But I've just lost something. And I constantly plague myself wondering "what happened?"
For the first time in my life, I'm truly scared to loose something. When I gave up playing hockey, or baseball, or any of those so called "childish" things, I felt like I had gained what I needed to from those experiences. But with this, I feel like I'd be loosing a part of myself, if I gave up. This is who I've been for so long. Maybe I don't know myself well enough, maybe this isn't what I'm supposed to do with my life. And it scares the hell out of me to think that might be true.
Today, this reality was exposed to me in an email, from a fellow I am trying to start a band with. For the first time in my life, I have been lazy and uninspired to jam with him. And he was wondering just how committed I was to playing music. And for the first time in my life, I had no answer....
For as long as I can remember, music has been life to me.
I woke up to music, I lived my day with music, and I fell asleep to music.
I'm not the most open minded about it, but I respect music. I cherish it more then people cherish their household pets.
I have been in three serious bands in my life. Dropout, eliote, and coast. All three have taught me, and continue to teach me what music can be.
In dropout I learned my instrument better then I thought I could play it. I learned the basic art of writing songs, and seeing how a band operates. Dropout was basically a vertical learning curve. It was my first band, and I will always cherish that band.
Eliote was me. Plain and simple. It was what I lived for. Everything in my day revolved around that band, and how I could further it. I went through three bass players and 2 drummers. Played almost 80 shows, and spent all my money just to get that name out. I stayed up night after night working and writing songs, trying to book shows, and just anything I could do for that band. It was my life. It took me through 2 hard break-ups, and pushed me to meet some of the best friends I have. It showed me what hard work can do and put more smiles on my face then anything or anyone else I've known or experienced. I knew what failure and success was from that.
Coast is the band I'm currently in. Although personally, it's a step back from where I wanted to be, it's still teaching me more then I could ever want. I know how to work with a second guitarist, listen to other bandmates, and let go of taking responsibility. But, in the long run, this band is very empty. It doesn't make me happy, and I find myself not enjoying music as much as I thought I would.
Has coast caused me to loose the passion I once had?
I am troubled by the way I've been feeling towards music lately. I have recently been exposed to some of the most inspiring music I've ever heard, I've been to many live shows and felt that feeling. But I've just lost something. And I constantly plague myself wondering "what happened?"
For the first time in my life, I'm truly scared to loose something. When I gave up playing hockey, or baseball, or any of those so called "childish" things, I felt like I had gained what I needed to from those experiences. But with this, I feel like I'd be loosing a part of myself, if I gave up. This is who I've been for so long. Maybe I don't know myself well enough, maybe this isn't what I'm supposed to do with my life. And it scares the hell out of me to think that might be true.
Today, this reality was exposed to me in an email, from a fellow I am trying to start a band with. For the first time in my life, I have been lazy and uninspired to jam with him. And he was wondering just how committed I was to playing music. And for the first time in my life, I had no answer....