The Best Heart (Chapter 7)
Title : The Best Heart (Chapter 7)
Author : Rien (Plot : mly_yamada)
Rating : PG
Words : 3394
Still terrible terrible english, grammar and all but I don't have time and knowledge to fix it.. :D So please bear it..
I don't know when I will come back..T_T
I'm so sorry..
The Best Heart 7
Two weeks later..
That was the time I was spending with Rei and her family. They make me busy with our wedding preparation.. maybe it was so sudden for a lot of people, but for them this was the best time. Between that time Rei’s mother bought us an apartment in Tokyo because I still work in that city, my new movie, the one I was shoot in Paris just about to launch so I have a lot of promo to begin with. Rei’s mother was so keen to make us together everytime, so she get that apartment for us.
Two days after I and Rei get together, I called Takaki and asked him about Yuri’s condition. He said Yuri still feel so weak, he was back to his treatment in Hospital directly after our meeting in my hometown. He was asleep when I call Takaki and I can’t say ‘I’m sorry’ to him. Since then I never call him or Takaki again because I’m afraid if I see him or hear his voice I want to go there.. to his place and leave Rei. I couldn’t do that..
I had promised to stay by her side, I can’t leave her just like that.
“You like this apartment, Ryosuke? It is so warm, because we have big window in our family room and that was so good..” Rei walked to the window which she said and stand there looked at the landscape outside.
“Yeah..” I answered shortly and staring at our new T.V.
“Yuto will come here this morning, he promise me to installing our TV and all the gadget here. You can accompany him for that, yeah?”
“Umm, alright..”
“I must go now.. I have a new project.”
“Okay, becarefull in your way there..” she walked to me and peck my lips softly. I just nodded and pick my car’s key and wallet from the table.
“Let Yuto know, no need to wait for me.. he can go home even I’m not comeback yet..”
“Yeah, I know..”
“Bye..”
“Ryosuke!”
I turn back my body to face Rei.
“Thank you, I’m really happy I can life with you..”
She was beautiful and I was so blind if I can’t falling in love with her again. But..
“Yeah, me too..”
My reply just short without any feeling..
****
“New energy drink commercial.. Is new life for you, Yamada!” I nodded to my manager. We sit in the conference room wait for the
Chinen’s company marketing manager if I’m not wrong, Takaki was their new marketing manager. I sighed, I will meet him like now? I don’t even prepare myself to see him.. how can I face him, I just like runaway from them without an apology..
“Morning..” Takaki come in alone, my manager stand to shake hand with him so I just followed him and Takaki seems don’t care with my nervousness he shake my hand tightly. After that he sit and talked to my manager he never looked at me. I know he was angry with me but he must know about how all that professionals do their job, right?
“The movie going pretty good, our president really proud of that..”
President? Yuri?
“How is he?” I asked blurtly. Because of my question Takaki for the first time stared at my eyes.
“He was good, he will doing his operation for his new heart. But he was good, right now. Thank you for asking..” he answered flatly.
“We will do the shooting tomorrow, because we need this out the same time with world cup event. So, I hope for your attend tomorrow Mr. Yamada.. this is the contract, you can sign them..” he give me the file but he refused to looked at my eyes again. I give up and sign up the contract. He take the folder back and stand up.
“Thank you so much. I really hope this will be going so well. Thank you..” he shake my manager’s hand again. And when he thrusting his hand to me I don’t take it.
“Takaki..”
Takaki take his hand back and sighed. My manager leave first and give us the place. Takaki just stand there in front of the conference’s room door and frowning at me.
“Can’t you be a gentleman? You never come or call.. you know how hard he was struggling to forget you? If you want this to end, do it yourself!”
“Yeah..”
“Don’t just be say ‘yeah’ like that!”
“But. If he already forget me, it was good, right?”
“He can’t sleep, you know? He always complaining if his bed room was too cold..” Takaki sighed.
“He don’t eat much too.. We really hope he will more healthy when he get a new heart..”
“Why he suddenly healthy after that incident? He even come with Umika to my hometown..”
“They said, they do the surgery to plant a new chip in his heart. He use that chip before he get Rei’s heart, so they plant it again. And that was managed to make him concisious and healthy again. But they say we better do the surgery for new heart as soon as possible because his heart can stopped suddenly. That chip isn’t really good with a sudden change of temperature.” Takaki look at his watch and nodded.
“He was coming here after lunch. You can see him if you a gentleman..”
“But, are you think that will be good? I’m afraid if he see me it will make his condition bad..”
“No, that’s okay.. You can say good bye to him.. actually he was intended to come to your place to say good bye before he was gone.”
“Where? Is he going somewhere?”
“He will go to America next week, his surgery will be held in that country.”
“Oh..”
He will leave from Japan, apparently..
“Be a gentleman and say to him you had forgiven him.. that will make him better.”
“Thank you, Takaki..”
****
Meanwhile Yuto and rei were busy to unpack our gadget and installed the device. They talked about their past and laughed when they say something funny.
“I love you first than Yamada, though..” Yuto said which make Rei stopped laughing.
“What..”
“Its true!” Yuto who laughing now..
“I like complimenting you and said ‘she was smart and beautiful, she was my ideal woman’ to Yamada. He agree and next week after that he already confessed to you. I was lost from him because I’m so slow!” Yuto smile to Rei, but she isn’t think this funny.
“Why you said that to me?” Rei asked him, her face serious.
“You think this wrong? I just thinking I will tell that in my speech at your wedding.. It was the past and still funny..” Yuto said, he was move more fast now, like he want to finished his work and leave from there. He never know telling her that story will make him feel embarrassed like this.
“Yuto..” Rei stroked Yuto’s shoulder softly.
“I’m sorry if I make you uncomfortable.. but, you know they will thinking you still have that feeling for me. And it will make your relationship get awkward with Ryosuke..”
“You don’t like if I still have that feeling? You know, I think Ryosuke’s feeling have changed toward you.. he has fallen in love with someone before you comeback here..” Yuto said that, suddenly feeling brave.
“No, he said he still love me?”
“Are you pretending to be blind so you can be together with him? Aren’t you see he was suffering? You torn him apart from the one he love..” Yuto looked at Rei. That girl face is pale and worried, Yuto stroked her cheek.
“You have known that I love you, right? You always refused if I want to come when you have date with him. Why you ignored me Rei? I can be as good as him because I falling in love with you in the same time with him. More important I haven’t change my feeling toward you..” Yuto kissed Rei’s head first.
And when he was sure Rei more calm and trust him, he kissed her lips..
****
I was standing at Chinen’s company park right at the lunch time. Takaki said he will be here for lunch, so I can meet him and say sorry. My eyes wondered a bit until I found him sat under the tree, I feel my heartbeat increasing, I feel more nervous than when I see Takaki this morning.
I must say something to him, though. Or I will lost him before I try to fight.
I will lost him eventually, but it will worth it to fight.
After make my own decision I move my legs to his table, its weird when I become close to him that doubt before gone little by little and when I stand in front of him I never more sure with my choice.
“Yuri.. how are you?”
He was in the phone with someone at that time and when he saw me the phone in his grip fell to the ground. I was panicked and take that from the ground.
“Hi? You will crushed your phone..” I sat across him and give the phone back to him, I put it in the table. Now he was staring at it like the phone was not real.
“Why you here?” he asked quietly.
“I think Takaki said you wanted to see me, but I think it will much better if I’m the one who see you..” he still looked down to his phone.
“I’m sorry. That day when I say I don’t know you I was acting.. It’s not true..”
“I think that’s better for us.. You want me to forget you, so you can be together with Rei.. I know that..”
“NO! I don’t even know that time I will be together with Rei! I always think she has died..” Now, I was bowed my head like him.
“But, you know.. I don’t have a choice..”
“You don’t have any choice?” finally we can stared at each other this time. His eyes a bit teary and his face pale, always pale since that day I brought him to hospital..
“You always think she was died and you said you love me Yamada! I think when I tell you she still alive you will still choose me! You will forget her and forgive me about her heart that I take from her!!” his voice can’t get more louder even when he want to shouted at me, because his tears choked his voice.
“I can’t! I can’t leave her, you know I already hurt her because I’m not there beside her when she need me! I have a lot of debt with her!”
“I DON’T CARE!! YOU SAID YOU LOVE ME!!” he manage to shouted out this time, after that he was a crying mess.
“Yuri, it was true.. I love you. I love you..” I tried to grab his hand but he slap my hand away.
“No, I never in your choice!”
“But..”
“You must say good bye to me. It was the one I wanted to asked you if I met you!!”
“NO! YURI TELL ME WHAT I’M SUPPOSED TO DO!” I began to feel panicked, I don’t want him to hate me. But at this time I can’t love him..
“I.. One week later I will doing a surgery for my new heart. I hope after that I will not “beat” for you again..”
I almost cry after he said that.
I don’t know but it was hurt when I know he want to forget me so bad, so he can move on..
“I hope.. the surgery will be success. I want you to be happy..” I said.
“No you don’t..”
“YURI!”
“YOU WANT ME TO BE HAPPY!! ARE YOU HAPPY NOW? WHEN YOU SEE ME LIKE THIS!! BROKEN AND HURT?!! BEFORE, I always feels warm.. but now it’s so cold. I barely breathing because my world suddenly froze..” he stand up then and without saying anything he leave me there and never looked back again.
Bad..
This end so bad..
****
After that I just sit in that chair without any feeling to do anything. I lost my soul.. I lost my Yuri..
“HELP!! SOMEONE HELP!! HE STOPPED BREATHING!!” I stand up so fast from my seat when I hear that and run to the table behind me. There already crowded with people who hear the woman voice.
“CALL 911, PLEASE!”
“I WOULD DO THAT!!” I pulled out my phone and when someone from 911 answered my call, they choose to stopped the car and bring the sick guy to the hospital as soon as possible. So I helped them to carried that guy body to the car which stopped to help us.
“Fuuhhh.. Why my day so bitter? I hope that guy will be okay..” I muttered under my breath and look at my surround me again. I wanted to checked if Yuri still there.
“Human is so kind, helping each other. But that guy won’t survived..”
“WOAH!!” I surprised when suddenly there was a man talked near me. I don’t see him before.
“You can see me?” he said flatly.
“What? Of course I can see you, you standing beside me..”
He just look more sullen after that.
“I think I will have more big job to do..”
“What?”
“Okay, maybe we will see again. And that time you will thanked me..” he smiled to me and walked away, he seems don’t care with my confusing.
“Alright this day is bitter and weird.”
****
“Hey, Ryosuke. Are you tired?” I come back to my.. No, Rei’s apartment and feel more tired when I see her face. What I’m supposed to do? I must do something about this! I definitely lost my feels for Rei when I convinced myself she already die and I can falling in love again with Yuri.
“Can I be by myself? This day? I’m very tired..”
“Oh, okay..” she take a step back and look at me worriedly.
“I’m okay.. Just, want to clear something from my head. I need time for myself.”
“Yeah..” she nooded slowly.
“I will sleep in the other room. You, take a rest too..”
“Ryosuke, can I asked you something? Just one..”
I’m really tired and I can cry anytime soon. But I breath slowly and look at Rei’s eyes.
“Are you tired of me?” she asked.
“No, No Rei.. don’t think about that.”
“I think you are changing..”
“What change from me?”
“You.. maybe.. you don’t feeling the same for me again..”
“What do you mean?”
“Ryosuke I’m sorry..” she sudennly hug me.
“But I don’t want to loose you, I don’t know what will happen if I don’t have you.. Please don’t leave me!!”
“I know and I won’t..” I tried to release her hug and smile to her.
“Go to sleep..”
I close the door of this empty room and sighed.
Can I have a choice? Or I can really made one? If I can, please don’t be so late.
Please don’t make me confuse like this.. my head.. you must work fast.
I don’t want regret about anything..
****
“YAMADA!! YAMADA WAKE UP!!!”
My head is hurt so bad, I don’t remember when I finally falling asleep. But it was like five minute? I don’t fell like sleep at all..
“YAMADA! CHINEN WAS ON THE NEWS!!”
“WHAT?!”
Now, with or without sleep I’m fully awake.
“WHAT HAPPENED??” I run and opened the door. Rei was standing there, tears flowing in her cheek..
“He..” she closed her face with her palm, it just make me more confusing!
“They found the body in his room this morning..”
The sound from the TV make me running there.
“They found him in his bed wrapped up in several blankets and his body already turned blue. He still breath when they found him, but the source tell us his heart already stopped beating before they reach the hospital... Chinen Yuri is the president from the big healty product company.. the world has know he was severe an illness but this company still believe in him to be the president. Now all the share sholder..”
I don’t hear that news again.
Before, I always feels warm.. but now it’s so cold.
I barely breathing because my world suddenly froze..
I must hear him that time. Shit, I was so slow..
I hate myself right now..
“Yamada what you gonna do?” I look up at Rei. My body trembling so hard. But, yeah I’m supposed to do something..
“I will go to the hospital..”
“You will leave me right? For him!!”
“SO WHAT DO YOU THINK I MUST DO NOW!! I LOVE HIM!! I LOVE HIM!!” now, my tears flowed.
“But you love me, yamada?”
“I can’t tell that..”
“NO!! WHY YOU SAID THAT??!” Rei run and hug me thight.
“Don’t leave Ryosuke, please.. I fight so hard to live because of you..”
“But you can live after that for sure.. Rei, you can live without me..”
“NO! NO! I CAN’T!!”
“Rei.. Please don’t do that to me.. Don’t torture me again with this promise things which had been changed. You know we need a lot of time to be in love with each other again. But I can’t erase my love for Chinen now..” my heart feels hurt when I said his name.
“He believe me with all his live, but I just leave him alone in there, in the cold. How mean I am, Rei.. you can’t love me when I feel so regret like this. I don’t deserve you, I don’t deserve anyone.. I can’t live my life if I lost him.. I’m sorry..”
And with that I run out from that apartment off to the hospital.
****
Because I’m so dumb. I’m not realize that I always have a choice..
But since at school I never good with multiple choice.
I always try to think with my head.
Even I know I’m always failed for that one. I have no brain.
Why I’m not think with my heart..
Why..
****
“WHERE IS HE!! LET ME SEE HIM!!”
“You can’t..” the nurses pushed me away from the ICU, the room where I sure they keep Chinen there.
“Yamada! You can’t make a fuss like this! Calm down!” Keito came from behind me. He still wear a suit which mean he just arrived here like me.
“You’re not there with them? How is he?? But you don’t know, right?” I began to talk non sense and panic.
“They say he still breathing. But they can’t do anything..” his face changed to symphaty when he realize I’m so worried with Chinen’s condition.
“Is my fault, Keito. I make him freeze in the cold.. I..” I’m choked when I can’t control my tears which coming down hard from my eyes, I feel my eyes burning.
“It’s not your fault. He have his own choice I think..” Keito stopped himself and he looked sad after that.
“It’s his choice to give up to find his own happiness..” he continued.
“NO! KEITO, DON’T YOU DARE!! TAKE MY HEART!! TAKE MY HEART NOW!” I grab his hand and beg for him with my flowing tears.
“Please, Keito..” I even knelt before him when I see he isn’t react.
“Yamada, you know right? You’re his source of happiness if I take your heart. He will choose to do this again..” Keito said slowly.
“So, you are agree this is my fault?”
“I’m sorry..” he tapped my shoulder and walked away from me to the ICU.
What..
Are they really give up on Chinen, like this?? And make me die because my fault??
Oh.. what must I do??
Please god..
I can’t lost him like this..
Please..
God..
I literally still knelt on the floor and put my head in that cold tile. Because my tears feel hot and the floor make it cold..
I’m a loser, I don’t care again what people think when they see the guy like me crying so hard like this. Not long after that I heard someone stepped in front of me. And stop right at where my head was.
“Yo!”
I don’t want to pick my head up.
“I think you must make a choice now.. yours and his choice..”
What?
Who is this person?
I finally look up to that person.
“Stand up, quick! We don’t have many times..”
He is? The person who talk to me yesterday. This guy yesterday not even try to help that guy who suddenly have an attack. What he want from me now?
“What do you want? You want to tell me if my Yuri wouldn’t survive too? If yes, fuck off..” I try to stand up anyway, even my knees feels so weak.
“The one who make that decision is you.”
“What? Who are you?”
“They call me Yabu.. so that’s maybe my name and I’m an angel of death..”
****
My heart beats so fast. I don’t know why I believe what this person say without him even try to conviced me.
“Angel of death?”
“Yes, that guy who you help yesterday.. I take his live away. And I was given a new order about this Yuri guy. This is the reason why you can see me yesterday.”
“What order? Are you going to take Yuri’s live? YOU CAN’T DO THAT!!” I can’t feel my lips, I’m so nervous. I think everyone will feel like dying when they talk to an angel of death.
“You just listen to me, answer when I ask you..”
Suddenly I feel a lot of pressure around me, it make me knelt down on the floor again. I can’t feel anything, my legs, the floor!! The ground!!
“I know this is hard, please bear with it.. This will be fast..”
He walk close to me and touch my shoulder. Suddenly the world around me hit with the most bright light and we aren’t in the hospital anymore.
“You two is not supposed to be like this. This is the people around you who make mistakes..”
Oh..
“But try to suicide isn’t right. He must learn that, so I must punished him!”
“No! he..”
“You want him to stay alive, right?! So, just quiet. I will asked you with one question and you must answer that quick! That guy haven’t a lot of time..”
“Okay..” I nodded so fast.
“For the punishment, what do you think I can take from him?”
“What?”
“Its mean he lost it..”
“WHAT? YOU CAN TAKE ME!! He can’t lost anything again!!”
“Aren’t you understand!! That guy before already told you, you are his happiness!! That your job when he recovered after this. You must make him happy!!”
“YES! I UNDERSTAND!”
He sighed..
“Because you’re so stupid. I will make a choice for you.. A. his voice B. his eyes or C. his legs..”
I SAID I’M BAD WITH MULTIPLE CHOICE!!
Shit..
“You just have ten second..”
Think Yamada..
Think with your heart..
“Four.. Three..”
“EYES!! You.. Can.. Take his eyes..”
He looked at my eyes. What? Is he try to see if I’m sure or not?
“Alright, then..”
“Ah..”
“Good bye..”
He eventually smile..
And I’m falling to the darkness after that. Back to the world and hope he is the real angel who won’t take Yuri’s death..
****
Meanwhile in the ICU..
“His brain is stopped five minute ago, he won’t survive.. I..” Umika’s father closed his eyes and Keito can see he will have a break down after this. Chinen is like his own son..
Keito try to look at other direction. He maybe will be crying at any minute. They will be take record about Chinen’s death time anytime soon.
But his eyes catched something imposible..
The heart detector..
“AH!! DOCTOR!! LOOK!! The heart..”
It’s beating!!
****
To Be Continue..
I want to write so bad but my time and brain is full and tired, so sometime I can't think anything to make a plot.
But, the other day I look at my other fandom and someone make an account in twitter and posted a story just a paragraph everyday. It's cute and I think if everyday maybe when I'm in my journey to my office I tweet a paraghraph or so..
It will be cute..
But, let see.. :) You can comment about it, and about the story of course.
Thank you for reading!!
Author : Rien (Plot : mly_yamada)
Rating : PG
Words : 3394
Still terrible terrible english, grammar and all but I don't have time and knowledge to fix it.. :D So please bear it..
I don't know when I will come back..T_T
I'm so sorry..
The Best Heart 7
Two weeks later..
That was the time I was spending with Rei and her family. They make me busy with our wedding preparation.. maybe it was so sudden for a lot of people, but for them this was the best time. Between that time Rei’s mother bought us an apartment in Tokyo because I still work in that city, my new movie, the one I was shoot in Paris just about to launch so I have a lot of promo to begin with. Rei’s mother was so keen to make us together everytime, so she get that apartment for us.
Two days after I and Rei get together, I called Takaki and asked him about Yuri’s condition. He said Yuri still feel so weak, he was back to his treatment in Hospital directly after our meeting in my hometown. He was asleep when I call Takaki and I can’t say ‘I’m sorry’ to him. Since then I never call him or Takaki again because I’m afraid if I see him or hear his voice I want to go there.. to his place and leave Rei. I couldn’t do that..
I had promised to stay by her side, I can’t leave her just like that.
“You like this apartment, Ryosuke? It is so warm, because we have big window in our family room and that was so good..” Rei walked to the window which she said and stand there looked at the landscape outside.
“Yeah..” I answered shortly and staring at our new T.V.
“Yuto will come here this morning, he promise me to installing our TV and all the gadget here. You can accompany him for that, yeah?”
“Umm, alright..”
“I must go now.. I have a new project.”
“Okay, becarefull in your way there..” she walked to me and peck my lips softly. I just nodded and pick my car’s key and wallet from the table.
“Let Yuto know, no need to wait for me.. he can go home even I’m not comeback yet..”
“Yeah, I know..”
“Bye..”
“Ryosuke!”
I turn back my body to face Rei.
“Thank you, I’m really happy I can life with you..”
She was beautiful and I was so blind if I can’t falling in love with her again. But..
“Yeah, me too..”
My reply just short without any feeling..
****
“New energy drink commercial.. Is new life for you, Yamada!” I nodded to my manager. We sit in the conference room wait for the
Chinen’s company marketing manager if I’m not wrong, Takaki was their new marketing manager. I sighed, I will meet him like now? I don’t even prepare myself to see him.. how can I face him, I just like runaway from them without an apology..
“Morning..” Takaki come in alone, my manager stand to shake hand with him so I just followed him and Takaki seems don’t care with my nervousness he shake my hand tightly. After that he sit and talked to my manager he never looked at me. I know he was angry with me but he must know about how all that professionals do their job, right?
“The movie going pretty good, our president really proud of that..”
President? Yuri?
“How is he?” I asked blurtly. Because of my question Takaki for the first time stared at my eyes.
“He was good, he will doing his operation for his new heart. But he was good, right now. Thank you for asking..” he answered flatly.
“We will do the shooting tomorrow, because we need this out the same time with world cup event. So, I hope for your attend tomorrow Mr. Yamada.. this is the contract, you can sign them..” he give me the file but he refused to looked at my eyes again. I give up and sign up the contract. He take the folder back and stand up.
“Thank you so much. I really hope this will be going so well. Thank you..” he shake my manager’s hand again. And when he thrusting his hand to me I don’t take it.
“Takaki..”
Takaki take his hand back and sighed. My manager leave first and give us the place. Takaki just stand there in front of the conference’s room door and frowning at me.
“Can’t you be a gentleman? You never come or call.. you know how hard he was struggling to forget you? If you want this to end, do it yourself!”
“Yeah..”
“Don’t just be say ‘yeah’ like that!”
“But. If he already forget me, it was good, right?”
“He can’t sleep, you know? He always complaining if his bed room was too cold..” Takaki sighed.
“He don’t eat much too.. We really hope he will more healthy when he get a new heart..”
“Why he suddenly healthy after that incident? He even come with Umika to my hometown..”
“They said, they do the surgery to plant a new chip in his heart. He use that chip before he get Rei’s heart, so they plant it again. And that was managed to make him concisious and healthy again. But they say we better do the surgery for new heart as soon as possible because his heart can stopped suddenly. That chip isn’t really good with a sudden change of temperature.” Takaki look at his watch and nodded.
“He was coming here after lunch. You can see him if you a gentleman..”
“But, are you think that will be good? I’m afraid if he see me it will make his condition bad..”
“No, that’s okay.. You can say good bye to him.. actually he was intended to come to your place to say good bye before he was gone.”
“Where? Is he going somewhere?”
“He will go to America next week, his surgery will be held in that country.”
“Oh..”
He will leave from Japan, apparently..
“Be a gentleman and say to him you had forgiven him.. that will make him better.”
“Thank you, Takaki..”
****
Meanwhile Yuto and rei were busy to unpack our gadget and installed the device. They talked about their past and laughed when they say something funny.
“I love you first than Yamada, though..” Yuto said which make Rei stopped laughing.
“What..”
“Its true!” Yuto who laughing now..
“I like complimenting you and said ‘she was smart and beautiful, she was my ideal woman’ to Yamada. He agree and next week after that he already confessed to you. I was lost from him because I’m so slow!” Yuto smile to Rei, but she isn’t think this funny.
“Why you said that to me?” Rei asked him, her face serious.
“You think this wrong? I just thinking I will tell that in my speech at your wedding.. It was the past and still funny..” Yuto said, he was move more fast now, like he want to finished his work and leave from there. He never know telling her that story will make him feel embarrassed like this.
“Yuto..” Rei stroked Yuto’s shoulder softly.
“I’m sorry if I make you uncomfortable.. but, you know they will thinking you still have that feeling for me. And it will make your relationship get awkward with Ryosuke..”
“You don’t like if I still have that feeling? You know, I think Ryosuke’s feeling have changed toward you.. he has fallen in love with someone before you comeback here..” Yuto said that, suddenly feeling brave.
“No, he said he still love me?”
“Are you pretending to be blind so you can be together with him? Aren’t you see he was suffering? You torn him apart from the one he love..” Yuto looked at Rei. That girl face is pale and worried, Yuto stroked her cheek.
“You have known that I love you, right? You always refused if I want to come when you have date with him. Why you ignored me Rei? I can be as good as him because I falling in love with you in the same time with him. More important I haven’t change my feeling toward you..” Yuto kissed Rei’s head first.
And when he was sure Rei more calm and trust him, he kissed her lips..
****
I was standing at Chinen’s company park right at the lunch time. Takaki said he will be here for lunch, so I can meet him and say sorry. My eyes wondered a bit until I found him sat under the tree, I feel my heartbeat increasing, I feel more nervous than when I see Takaki this morning.
I must say something to him, though. Or I will lost him before I try to fight.
I will lost him eventually, but it will worth it to fight.
After make my own decision I move my legs to his table, its weird when I become close to him that doubt before gone little by little and when I stand in front of him I never more sure with my choice.
“Yuri.. how are you?”
He was in the phone with someone at that time and when he saw me the phone in his grip fell to the ground. I was panicked and take that from the ground.
“Hi? You will crushed your phone..” I sat across him and give the phone back to him, I put it in the table. Now he was staring at it like the phone was not real.
“Why you here?” he asked quietly.
“I think Takaki said you wanted to see me, but I think it will much better if I’m the one who see you..” he still looked down to his phone.
“I’m sorry. That day when I say I don’t know you I was acting.. It’s not true..”
“I think that’s better for us.. You want me to forget you, so you can be together with Rei.. I know that..”
“NO! I don’t even know that time I will be together with Rei! I always think she has died..” Now, I was bowed my head like him.
“But, you know.. I don’t have a choice..”
“You don’t have any choice?” finally we can stared at each other this time. His eyes a bit teary and his face pale, always pale since that day I brought him to hospital..
“You always think she was died and you said you love me Yamada! I think when I tell you she still alive you will still choose me! You will forget her and forgive me about her heart that I take from her!!” his voice can’t get more louder even when he want to shouted at me, because his tears choked his voice.
“I can’t! I can’t leave her, you know I already hurt her because I’m not there beside her when she need me! I have a lot of debt with her!”
“I DON’T CARE!! YOU SAID YOU LOVE ME!!” he manage to shouted out this time, after that he was a crying mess.
“Yuri, it was true.. I love you. I love you..” I tried to grab his hand but he slap my hand away.
“No, I never in your choice!”
“But..”
“You must say good bye to me. It was the one I wanted to asked you if I met you!!”
“NO! YURI TELL ME WHAT I’M SUPPOSED TO DO!” I began to feel panicked, I don’t want him to hate me. But at this time I can’t love him..
“I.. One week later I will doing a surgery for my new heart. I hope after that I will not “beat” for you again..”
I almost cry after he said that.
I don’t know but it was hurt when I know he want to forget me so bad, so he can move on..
“I hope.. the surgery will be success. I want you to be happy..” I said.
“No you don’t..”
“YURI!”
“YOU WANT ME TO BE HAPPY!! ARE YOU HAPPY NOW? WHEN YOU SEE ME LIKE THIS!! BROKEN AND HURT?!! BEFORE, I always feels warm.. but now it’s so cold. I barely breathing because my world suddenly froze..” he stand up then and without saying anything he leave me there and never looked back again.
Bad..
This end so bad..
****
After that I just sit in that chair without any feeling to do anything. I lost my soul.. I lost my Yuri..
“HELP!! SOMEONE HELP!! HE STOPPED BREATHING!!” I stand up so fast from my seat when I hear that and run to the table behind me. There already crowded with people who hear the woman voice.
“CALL 911, PLEASE!”
“I WOULD DO THAT!!” I pulled out my phone and when someone from 911 answered my call, they choose to stopped the car and bring the sick guy to the hospital as soon as possible. So I helped them to carried that guy body to the car which stopped to help us.
“Fuuhhh.. Why my day so bitter? I hope that guy will be okay..” I muttered under my breath and look at my surround me again. I wanted to checked if Yuri still there.
“Human is so kind, helping each other. But that guy won’t survived..”
“WOAH!!” I surprised when suddenly there was a man talked near me. I don’t see him before.
“You can see me?” he said flatly.
“What? Of course I can see you, you standing beside me..”
He just look more sullen after that.
“I think I will have more big job to do..”
“What?”
“Okay, maybe we will see again. And that time you will thanked me..” he smiled to me and walked away, he seems don’t care with my confusing.
“Alright this day is bitter and weird.”
****
“Hey, Ryosuke. Are you tired?” I come back to my.. No, Rei’s apartment and feel more tired when I see her face. What I’m supposed to do? I must do something about this! I definitely lost my feels for Rei when I convinced myself she already die and I can falling in love again with Yuri.
“Can I be by myself? This day? I’m very tired..”
“Oh, okay..” she take a step back and look at me worriedly.
“I’m okay.. Just, want to clear something from my head. I need time for myself.”
“Yeah..” she nooded slowly.
“I will sleep in the other room. You, take a rest too..”
“Ryosuke, can I asked you something? Just one..”
I’m really tired and I can cry anytime soon. But I breath slowly and look at Rei’s eyes.
“Are you tired of me?” she asked.
“No, No Rei.. don’t think about that.”
“I think you are changing..”
“What change from me?”
“You.. maybe.. you don’t feeling the same for me again..”
“What do you mean?”
“Ryosuke I’m sorry..” she sudennly hug me.
“But I don’t want to loose you, I don’t know what will happen if I don’t have you.. Please don’t leave me!!”
“I know and I won’t..” I tried to release her hug and smile to her.
“Go to sleep..”
I close the door of this empty room and sighed.
Can I have a choice? Or I can really made one? If I can, please don’t be so late.
Please don’t make me confuse like this.. my head.. you must work fast.
I don’t want regret about anything..
****
“YAMADA!! YAMADA WAKE UP!!!”
My head is hurt so bad, I don’t remember when I finally falling asleep. But it was like five minute? I don’t fell like sleep at all..
“YAMADA! CHINEN WAS ON THE NEWS!!”
“WHAT?!”
Now, with or without sleep I’m fully awake.
“WHAT HAPPENED??” I run and opened the door. Rei was standing there, tears flowing in her cheek..
“He..” she closed her face with her palm, it just make me more confusing!
“They found the body in his room this morning..”
The sound from the TV make me running there.
“They found him in his bed wrapped up in several blankets and his body already turned blue. He still breath when they found him, but the source tell us his heart already stopped beating before they reach the hospital... Chinen Yuri is the president from the big healty product company.. the world has know he was severe an illness but this company still believe in him to be the president. Now all the share sholder..”
I don’t hear that news again.
Before, I always feels warm.. but now it’s so cold.
I barely breathing because my world suddenly froze..
I must hear him that time. Shit, I was so slow..
I hate myself right now..
“Yamada what you gonna do?” I look up at Rei. My body trembling so hard. But, yeah I’m supposed to do something..
“I will go to the hospital..”
“You will leave me right? For him!!”
“SO WHAT DO YOU THINK I MUST DO NOW!! I LOVE HIM!! I LOVE HIM!!” now, my tears flowed.
“But you love me, yamada?”
“I can’t tell that..”
“NO!! WHY YOU SAID THAT??!” Rei run and hug me thight.
“Don’t leave Ryosuke, please.. I fight so hard to live because of you..”
“But you can live after that for sure.. Rei, you can live without me..”
“NO! NO! I CAN’T!!”
“Rei.. Please don’t do that to me.. Don’t torture me again with this promise things which had been changed. You know we need a lot of time to be in love with each other again. But I can’t erase my love for Chinen now..” my heart feels hurt when I said his name.
“He believe me with all his live, but I just leave him alone in there, in the cold. How mean I am, Rei.. you can’t love me when I feel so regret like this. I don’t deserve you, I don’t deserve anyone.. I can’t live my life if I lost him.. I’m sorry..”
And with that I run out from that apartment off to the hospital.
****
Because I’m so dumb. I’m not realize that I always have a choice..
But since at school I never good with multiple choice.
I always try to think with my head.
Even I know I’m always failed for that one. I have no brain.
Why I’m not think with my heart..
Why..
****
“WHERE IS HE!! LET ME SEE HIM!!”
“You can’t..” the nurses pushed me away from the ICU, the room where I sure they keep Chinen there.
“Yamada! You can’t make a fuss like this! Calm down!” Keito came from behind me. He still wear a suit which mean he just arrived here like me.
“You’re not there with them? How is he?? But you don’t know, right?” I began to talk non sense and panic.
“They say he still breathing. But they can’t do anything..” his face changed to symphaty when he realize I’m so worried with Chinen’s condition.
“Is my fault, Keito. I make him freeze in the cold.. I..” I’m choked when I can’t control my tears which coming down hard from my eyes, I feel my eyes burning.
“It’s not your fault. He have his own choice I think..” Keito stopped himself and he looked sad after that.
“It’s his choice to give up to find his own happiness..” he continued.
“NO! KEITO, DON’T YOU DARE!! TAKE MY HEART!! TAKE MY HEART NOW!” I grab his hand and beg for him with my flowing tears.
“Please, Keito..” I even knelt before him when I see he isn’t react.
“Yamada, you know right? You’re his source of happiness if I take your heart. He will choose to do this again..” Keito said slowly.
“So, you are agree this is my fault?”
“I’m sorry..” he tapped my shoulder and walked away from me to the ICU.
What..
Are they really give up on Chinen, like this?? And make me die because my fault??
Oh.. what must I do??
Please god..
I can’t lost him like this..
Please..
God..
I literally still knelt on the floor and put my head in that cold tile. Because my tears feel hot and the floor make it cold..
I’m a loser, I don’t care again what people think when they see the guy like me crying so hard like this. Not long after that I heard someone stepped in front of me. And stop right at where my head was.
“Yo!”
I don’t want to pick my head up.
“I think you must make a choice now.. yours and his choice..”
What?
Who is this person?
I finally look up to that person.
“Stand up, quick! We don’t have many times..”
He is? The person who talk to me yesterday. This guy yesterday not even try to help that guy who suddenly have an attack. What he want from me now?
“What do you want? You want to tell me if my Yuri wouldn’t survive too? If yes, fuck off..” I try to stand up anyway, even my knees feels so weak.
“The one who make that decision is you.”
“What? Who are you?”
“They call me Yabu.. so that’s maybe my name and I’m an angel of death..”
****
My heart beats so fast. I don’t know why I believe what this person say without him even try to conviced me.
“Angel of death?”
“Yes, that guy who you help yesterday.. I take his live away. And I was given a new order about this Yuri guy. This is the reason why you can see me yesterday.”
“What order? Are you going to take Yuri’s live? YOU CAN’T DO THAT!!” I can’t feel my lips, I’m so nervous. I think everyone will feel like dying when they talk to an angel of death.
“You just listen to me, answer when I ask you..”
Suddenly I feel a lot of pressure around me, it make me knelt down on the floor again. I can’t feel anything, my legs, the floor!! The ground!!
“I know this is hard, please bear with it.. This will be fast..”
He walk close to me and touch my shoulder. Suddenly the world around me hit with the most bright light and we aren’t in the hospital anymore.
“You two is not supposed to be like this. This is the people around you who make mistakes..”
Oh..
“But try to suicide isn’t right. He must learn that, so I must punished him!”
“No! he..”
“You want him to stay alive, right?! So, just quiet. I will asked you with one question and you must answer that quick! That guy haven’t a lot of time..”
“Okay..” I nodded so fast.
“For the punishment, what do you think I can take from him?”
“What?”
“Its mean he lost it..”
“WHAT? YOU CAN TAKE ME!! He can’t lost anything again!!”
“Aren’t you understand!! That guy before already told you, you are his happiness!! That your job when he recovered after this. You must make him happy!!”
“YES! I UNDERSTAND!”
He sighed..
“Because you’re so stupid. I will make a choice for you.. A. his voice B. his eyes or C. his legs..”
I SAID I’M BAD WITH MULTIPLE CHOICE!!
Shit..
“You just have ten second..”
Think Yamada..
Think with your heart..
“Four.. Three..”
“EYES!! You.. Can.. Take his eyes..”
He looked at my eyes. What? Is he try to see if I’m sure or not?
“Alright, then..”
“Ah..”
“Good bye..”
He eventually smile..
And I’m falling to the darkness after that. Back to the world and hope he is the real angel who won’t take Yuri’s death..
****
Meanwhile in the ICU..
“His brain is stopped five minute ago, he won’t survive.. I..” Umika’s father closed his eyes and Keito can see he will have a break down after this. Chinen is like his own son..
Keito try to look at other direction. He maybe will be crying at any minute. They will be take record about Chinen’s death time anytime soon.
But his eyes catched something imposible..
The heart detector..
“AH!! DOCTOR!! LOOK!! The heart..”
It’s beating!!
****
To Be Continue..
I want to write so bad but my time and brain is full and tired, so sometime I can't think anything to make a plot.
But, the other day I look at my other fandom and someone make an account in twitter and posted a story just a paragraph everyday. It's cute and I think if everyday maybe when I'm in my journey to my office I tweet a paraghraph or so..
It will be cute..
But, let see.. :) You can comment about it, and about the story of course.
Thank you for reading!!