(no subject)
Well another day and a nother time. hows it going all? everything going good for you? well im at my intership again and my uncle is not here because he went out of town so im just chillen for now because i am hella tired. i will put jokes up at least tuesday - friday!
The only cow in a small town in Arkansas stopped giving milk. The people did some research and found they could buy a cow up in Westby, Wisconsin, for $600. They bought the cow from Wisconsin, and the cow was wonderful. It produced lots of milk all of the time, and the people were pleased and very happy.
They decided to acquire a bull to mate with the cow and produce more cows like it. They would never have to worry about their milk supply again.
They bought a bull and put it in the pasture with their beloved cow. However, whenever the bull came close to the cow, the cow would move away. No matter what approach the bull tried, the cow would move away
from the bull, and he could not succeed in his quest.
The people were very upset and decided to ask the Vet, who was very wise, what to do. They told the Vet what was happening: "Whenever the bull approaches our cow, she moves away. If he approaches from the back, she moves forward.When he approaches her from the front, she backs off. and when he approaches from the side, she walks away to the other side."
The Vet thinks about this for a minute and asks, "Did you buy this cow in Wisconsin?"
The people were dumbfounded, since they had never mentioned where they bought the cow. "You are truly a wise Vet," they said. "How did you know we got the cow in Wisconsin?"
The Vet replied with a distant look in his eye, "My wife is from
Wisconsin."
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A guy hooked up with a girl from Mexico. After dating for a few weeks, they begin to have sex. One night while they were having sex, the girl starts yelling "PERJUCIO AGUJERO, PERJUCIO AGUJERO" faster and louder as they reached their orgasm. The guy didn't know what she said but took it as some sort of praise.
The next day as he was playing golf with his friends. He was bragging about how lucky he got the night before. When he got a hole in one, he shouted "PERJUCIO AGUJERO!" They stared at him and said, "what do you mean 'wrong hole?'"
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Two old men decided that since they were so old and probably didn't have much time left on this earth, they would like to have a good time.
After a few drinks they end up at the local brothel. The madam takes one look at the two old geezers and whispers to her manager, "go up to the first two rooms and put an inflated doll in each bed. These two are so old and drunk, I am not wasting two of my girls on them. They won't know the difference."
Her manager does as she is told and the two old men go up the stairs and take care of their business.
As they are walking home, the first one says, "you know, I think my girl was dead!"
"Dead", says his friend, "why would you think that?"
Well, she never moved or made a sound all the time I was loving her."
His friends says, "I think mine was a witch."
"A WITCH!! What makes you say that?"
"Well, I was making love to her, kissing on her neck and I gave her a little bite and then she farted and flew out the window!"
The only cow in a small town in Arkansas stopped giving milk. The people did some research and found they could buy a cow up in Westby, Wisconsin, for $600. They bought the cow from Wisconsin, and the cow was wonderful. It produced lots of milk all of the time, and the people were pleased and very happy.
They decided to acquire a bull to mate with the cow and produce more cows like it. They would never have to worry about their milk supply again.
They bought a bull and put it in the pasture with their beloved cow. However, whenever the bull came close to the cow, the cow would move away. No matter what approach the bull tried, the cow would move away
from the bull, and he could not succeed in his quest.
The people were very upset and decided to ask the Vet, who was very wise, what to do. They told the Vet what was happening: "Whenever the bull approaches our cow, she moves away. If he approaches from the back, she moves forward.When he approaches her from the front, she backs off. and when he approaches from the side, she walks away to the other side."
The Vet thinks about this for a minute and asks, "Did you buy this cow in Wisconsin?"
The people were dumbfounded, since they had never mentioned where they bought the cow. "You are truly a wise Vet," they said. "How did you know we got the cow in Wisconsin?"
The Vet replied with a distant look in his eye, "My wife is from
Wisconsin."
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A guy hooked up with a girl from Mexico. After dating for a few weeks, they begin to have sex. One night while they were having sex, the girl starts yelling "PERJUCIO AGUJERO, PERJUCIO AGUJERO" faster and louder as they reached their orgasm. The guy didn't know what she said but took it as some sort of praise.
The next day as he was playing golf with his friends. He was bragging about how lucky he got the night before. When he got a hole in one, he shouted "PERJUCIO AGUJERO!" They stared at him and said, "what do you mean 'wrong hole?'"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Two old men decided that since they were so old and probably didn't have much time left on this earth, they would like to have a good time.
After a few drinks they end up at the local brothel. The madam takes one look at the two old geezers and whispers to her manager, "go up to the first two rooms and put an inflated doll in each bed. These two are so old and drunk, I am not wasting two of my girls on them. They won't know the difference."
Her manager does as she is told and the two old men go up the stairs and take care of their business.
As they are walking home, the first one says, "you know, I think my girl was dead!"
"Dead", says his friend, "why would you think that?"
Well, she never moved or made a sound all the time I was loving her."
His friends says, "I think mine was a witch."
"A WITCH!! What makes you say that?"
"Well, I was making love to her, kissing on her neck and I gave her a little bite and then she farted and flew out the window!"