Where's the prozac when I need it?
Let me start by saying GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!! Ok, better now; I think. Serious, I needed that. If you have to ask, then you don't need to know.
Why why WHY do people have to annoy me?! Is it like, some mission that I don't know about? Do they get a prize or something for doing it?!! It's days like this that make me REALLY rethink the whole nun thing. Being in a convent, somewhere far far away; a vow of silence and NO PEOPLE...NOT a bad concept!
Ok, sorry about that; but right now my online and offline line seem to majorly suck. If it's not online problems, it's my mother driving me up a fucking wall. Ok, I KNOW she's old and I SHOULD have more patience, but sometimes...gggggrrrrr. How is it that the woman can make me feel guilty so easily?! It's like a talent or something. I sometimes think the only thing in life that would make her happy would be if I moved back to New Orleans and left David here in Texas. If I hear one more time how she has 'no one', I am going to scream..again...loudly. And I have offered her, time and again to move in with us even. May the gods preserve me.
Guilt is such a wonderful thing *sarcastic mutter*. I even feel guilty about being online. Guilty because I didn't get done what I wanted in the house, guilty for not roleplaying with Nita, guilty for roleplaying with Nita instead of Heather. Serious, my head is about to explode. And then, of course, there is the guild on Guild Wars that I am sure thinks I have died or something equally horrible, so I feel guilty about that too. *big sigh*
Today, for the first time in awhile, I thought about cutting myself, really seriously thought about it. I'm trying real hard to fight it, but it isn't easy. At least maybe it would relieve some of this stress. I'm fat, 41, have no life and..blah. Sorry for the 'pity party' it's just one of those days.
I usually do not rant like this and I do apologize. I guess everyone (even me) has a right to a little hissy fit every now and then, eh?
Why why WHY do people have to annoy me?! Is it like, some mission that I don't know about? Do they get a prize or something for doing it?!! It's days like this that make me REALLY rethink the whole nun thing. Being in a convent, somewhere far far away; a vow of silence and NO PEOPLE...NOT a bad concept!
Ok, sorry about that; but right now my online and offline line seem to majorly suck. If it's not online problems, it's my mother driving me up a fucking wall. Ok, I KNOW she's old and I SHOULD have more patience, but sometimes...gggggrrrrr. How is it that the woman can make me feel guilty so easily?! It's like a talent or something. I sometimes think the only thing in life that would make her happy would be if I moved back to New Orleans and left David here in Texas. If I hear one more time how she has 'no one', I am going to scream..again...loudly. And I have offered her, time and again to move in with us even. May the gods preserve me.
Guilt is such a wonderful thing *sarcastic mutter*. I even feel guilty about being online. Guilty because I didn't get done what I wanted in the house, guilty for not roleplaying with Nita, guilty for roleplaying with Nita instead of Heather. Serious, my head is about to explode. And then, of course, there is the guild on Guild Wars that I am sure thinks I have died or something equally horrible, so I feel guilty about that too. *big sigh*
Today, for the first time in awhile, I thought about cutting myself, really seriously thought about it. I'm trying real hard to fight it, but it isn't easy. At least maybe it would relieve some of this stress. I'm fat, 41, have no life and..blah. Sorry for the 'pity party' it's just one of those days.
I usually do not rant like this and I do apologize. I guess everyone (even me) has a right to a little hissy fit every now and then, eh?