a dime a dozen

Nov 03, 2003 21:28

I don't really know what I feel like writing. I kinda just feel like writing some serious stuff. Wow, I might actually put it as public! Today, one of Philish's good friends from highschool named Tiffany died. (LJ Shesaith) I didn't know her at all but I read her LJ a lot and she wrote some pretty awesome stuff if you wanna check it out. She was hit by a car when she was getting out of her car on I-95 to help out people. Geez, of all ways to go. Philish is pretty upset by it. As she should be. It just kinda made me stop and realize how precious life is. We take so many things for granted. Now that we are getting older, more things are happening to us and more people in our lives are dying. Death is such a harsh thing to deal with. It's one of those things where you kinda have to accept it but never really do. And I for one surely don't want to just accept it. Last year when Brooke Straub died, I was so upset. She was my exboyfriend's cousin and she was only 23 years old and had a little baby girl who is 2, named Desire. I used to babysit her all the time. One of those things that just kinda makes you stop and be like...whoa...that could have been me....I guess you gotta live everyday to it's fullest? Which I kinda always try to do anyways. You know my motto..."All or nothing baby" I freaking even have that tattooed on me. I live by it. Maybe that's why I am so affectionate with people? I just believe in letting people that you love know that you love them. I try and tell people all the time and I love to hug, tight, suffocating hugs. haha. Yesterday at dinner I was talking with Kristin about how I didn't have that one person that I could just share everything I was thinking about, my deepest thoughts and secrets with. Neither did she. I think everyone should have one of those. Maybe that's why I do private entries? It's like my fallout best friend. But Kristin used to be that person and I'm thinking things are getting back to how they used to be. I surely hope they will next year. I'm ready for some changes. I'm just tired of all this going on with me. I just pray that moving back home will be a good decision. I think when I first moved up here I had just gotton out of a serious relationship so I was ready to party and do all the crap that typical college student do. Now, I just wanna chill with friends, drink sometimes, or just hang. Gville doesn't really do that. Well, maybe I just don't have the friends up here that do that. Eh, I'm done for now. I think I'll throw in some poetry of mine later too. Maybe, if I can conjure up some that is worth showing. Even though I don't think there is really any "bad" poetry. As long as you're saying what you want to say and how you want to say it. You can express words however you want to.
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