I just need to keep you in mind.... as something larger then life.
I like to babble.
Just ranting for miles without knowing how to put it to verse.
Just try to streighten out the words into some clever metaphor.
Of course, someday, when I learn how to write worthwhile, I'm going to look at these.
And laugh at how clever, or lack there of, I really am.
I'm gonna feel stupid, and putrid, and digsusted and hating,
But right now....
Right now...
I don't care.
This makes me happy.
The sheer fact that no ones gonna read any of these to any actknowledgement, I'm fine with that. I'm done showing people these, I can just hope maybe someone makes an effort to find this themselves? or ask me even.
I like to be pushed around.
It makes me happy.
I hate being the boss, because its my head when the bad times go down.
I don't evne know what I'm saying anymore.
But once I figure it out, I'll put it here.
...
hmmm. I wonder. No one cares enough to see these, so why do I always try to make everything on here sound so rythmic and lyrical?
Personal satifcastion? No, because I'm happy with myself.
Maybe flattery, because I want to be good at this. And someone out there has to like my work, someone has to like my stuff.
I've had someone tell me my stuff was horrible. It made me feel better then anything anyone else has ever said about it.
When I trust someone, I trust them with everything I am, I give myself up to them. It just sucks when thats too much for them to bare.
Just ranting for miles without knowing how to put it to verse.
Just try to streighten out the words into some clever metaphor.
Of course, someday, when I learn how to write worthwhile, I'm going to look at these.
And laugh at how clever, or lack there of, I really am.
I'm gonna feel stupid, and putrid, and digsusted and hating,
But right now....
Right now...
I don't care.
This makes me happy.
The sheer fact that no ones gonna read any of these to any actknowledgement, I'm fine with that. I'm done showing people these, I can just hope maybe someone makes an effort to find this themselves? or ask me even.
I like to be pushed around.
It makes me happy.
I hate being the boss, because its my head when the bad times go down.
I don't evne know what I'm saying anymore.
But once I figure it out, I'll put it here.
...
hmmm. I wonder. No one cares enough to see these, so why do I always try to make everything on here sound so rythmic and lyrical?
Personal satifcastion? No, because I'm happy with myself.
Maybe flattery, because I want to be good at this. And someone out there has to like my work, someone has to like my stuff.
I've had someone tell me my stuff was horrible. It made me feel better then anything anyone else has ever said about it.
When I trust someone, I trust them with everything I am, I give myself up to them. It just sucks when thats too much for them to bare.