(no subject)

Sep 04, 2005 12:03

so everyone left for school and summers just about officially over. it sucks...i totallly feel like this isn't supposed to be happening yet. i feel like in 3 days i'll walk right back into squan and have it be the same..i guess it'll be a nice change to not see everyone all the time..i had a good summer i think...went to concerts, met amazing people, smoked, drank, the whole 9. but the more n more i think about how everyone left for school it makes me depressed. i wish i went away to school cuz this lil ol' town is so dead without my girls here....i keep thinking i see like megans car and nicoles all over the place but its not them...obviously. i realized alot this summer too...about mistakes and regrets from the past. now i know why things ended and why we stopped takling. - that was a regret....i did something last nite that i truly regret....i never learn...i met rich as most of u guys know already and i dont kno what to say about that...i like him n everything and its hard cuz we never talk cuz hes always busy "partying" so i've been upset and pissed off alot lately. i've also cried alot more then i have in a while this summer cuz of everything...people leaving, people being assholes, making mistakes, having regrets. i've fought with my mom alot this summer too and that sucks cuz besides megan she is like my best friend so it jus sucks...she did say i can get a tattooo tho...so that's cool i mean this morning we fought over stupid shit but i mean i have been kinda on edge lately about alot...i'm jus like so upset over everything lately..i need a break from this life to go away and kinda forget about everything for a little while. thats why i hope that next weekened i go to ESU to see kerrin and matt.. i was planning on going to see rich but he doesn't really seem like he wants to see me so im not gona bother him about that. so i'll go party it up at ESU forget bout some shit and have that be that. i miss my friends alot...like i realize we really are growing up n its weird...in 4-5 years all of us are going to have real jobs and maybe even start families...all my girls n me have been thru so much shit together and i kno thats gona keep us all intouch even if we all dont stay as close as we started out to be i know that one day, when were all grown up we'll see eachother n kinda have it be like crossroads...in the end we'll all be together having the time of our lives...i know that thanksgiving is in like 2 months nd im gona see all my freinds then so i got nothin to worry bout but girls i want you to know i miss you like hell even if we dont really talk anymore you know who you are!

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