FANMIX'S BY RICEBALL & KANO
1[Tatu - Loves Me Not]
Complicated our lives, by falling in love with him. I complicated our lives, now I'm losing my only friend. I don't know why, I had to try...living my life on the other side. Now I'm so confused, I don't know what to do.
Harry didn't know what to do. Ginny knew....Ron knew. They know now he fucks boys and likes it. What's even worse that he loves Malfoy. That question from Ron broke him every time he thought of him, "Fuck Harry, what about Ginny? She loved you."
2[The Exies - Dear Enemy]
You're self righteous, the butt of the joke. And it's a secret, everyone knows. (...You're like a virus eating my skin, it's a problem I think it's a sin.)
Ever sence Malfoy's father was thrown into Azkaban, people think Malfoy got what was coming to him. Now not at the top of the Slytherin hierarchy, but still self righteous and pompus as ever, Harry couldn't help but smile.
3[Muse - Time Is Running Out]
I wanted freedom, bound and restricted. I tried to give you up, but I'm addicted. (...How did it come to this?)
He was told on more then one occasion that he was obsessed 'bloody Malfoy'. He didn't care anymore. He needed to find Malfoy. But it quickly turned into something more; it was almost a game, as if Malfoy knew he was being watched by him. Every trace of blond hair that was seen was followed, hoping it was him.
4[Sevendust - Praise]
Save you; I would never- Deny you. Even though your hate for me is strong.
Harry never thought Malfoy was truely as evil as his father or Voldemort. He can tell from looking in those pale grey eyes that he wouldn't hurt anyone unless he truely had to; that made him want to pull him to his side, but the animosity between them was too great to even reach the boy. It was tearing Harry apart.
5[Tatu - Friend or Foe]
Give to each other, lie undercover so, are you friend or foe? (Because I used to know.)
Pale skin met more pale hot skin, sweaty and smelling of sex. A pounding heart beats under lips as Draco made his way to Harry's own. As the blond looked up to the boy under him, that look he's been advoiding, questioning. He ignores it and takes a nipple into his mouth, forcing a moan from his lover.
6[The Rasmus - In The Shadow]
They say, that I must learn to kill before I can feel safe. But I, I'd rather kill myself than turn into their slave. Sometimes, I feel that I should go and play with the thunder; somehow, I just don't wanna stay and wait for a wonder. (I've been waiting.)
Bloody and almost broken, Draco escapes the confines of the Riddle House, now the holding ground for the Death Eaters. He never wanted to be a Death Eater, but played along anyways, even if it meant risking his life for a boy he cared more about then he wanted to admit. In the freezing cold, grasping his wounds tightly, he heard a branch break behind him. "I didn't think you'd come Malfoy." That voice, Draco turned around and smirked back at Potter. "He's in there Potter. Now kill the bastard."
7[Dido - Here With Me]
I’ll do what I want. But I can’t hide. I won’t go. I won’t sleep. I can’t breathe, until you’re resting here with me.
The ground was stained with blood and memories of what had happened just hours previously. He had just escaped with an inch of his life, Harry was lucky, Voldemort laid in thousands of pieces and probably burnt to ashes by now by the ministry. But he couldn't find Draco, no clothing, wand, or hair left behind. Nothing.
8[TaTu - Perfect Enemy]
Things I loved before, are not for sale. Keep yourself away, far away from me. I forever stay your perfect enemy.
Harry raised his wand to the Death Eater before him. Gasping for breath, speaking as he pressed his want to the mans throat. "Malfoy, you had a chance to change sides, I gave you that chance. But you didn't take it." The brunette presses the pliant wood into the skin, "die Malfoy, for all I care---Avada Kad-" Steel-blue eyes widen as a green light burn his skin.
9[Kylie Minogue - Can't Get You Out Of My Head]
There's a dark secret in me, don't leave me locked in your heart. Set me free-Feel the need in me-Set me free, Stay forever and ever and ever and ever.
Draco turned his head as he watched Scar-head leave the Great Hall in quick rush. It was as all over the wizarding papers that Potter's delinquent of a godfather was killed. He faught the frown quickly taking his delicate features. Whoever did this, to him; his Har-Scarhead, is going to pay. He's the only one who can make Potter's life hell.
10[My Chemical Romance - I'm Not Okay(I Promise)]
Forget about the dirty looks, the photographs your boyfriend took. You said you read me like a book, but the pages all are torn and frayed. (...I'm not Okay, I Promise.)
Harry gripped the expensive fabric of Malfoy's shirt, shoving the stunned blond roughly against the cold stone wall. "You know how I feel about you Malfoy and you do this stupid shit in front of me. With that whore of a Ravenclaw." Malfoy tilted his head to the side, a grin filling his features fully to his eyes. "Yeah? Jealous Potter?"
~0~
1) sleeps with butterflies - tori amos
Are you having regrets about last night?
I'm not, but I like rivers that rush in
So then I dove in
They had a bottle of firewhiskey to thank for it, when Remus fell silent at how close they'd gotten, and Sirius worked up the courage to put his fingers in Remus's hair, his tongue in Remus's mouth.
2) take me as I am - faith hill
I don't need a bed of roses
because roses wither away.
All I really need is honesty
from someone with a strong heart - a gentle hand,
Who'll take me as I am.
The sun was up, another full-moon survived. James was watching dispassionatly as Sirius held Remus, and smoothed his fine-blonde hair away from his eyes.
"You smell like a wet dog." Remus whispered through the worst of his aches, snuffed there close to Sirius's chest.
"You have werewolf breath.." Sirius whispered back, looking down as Remus glanced up, and when their eyes met, they both smiled.
"Weird sense of romance those two have, there.." James mused aloud, to himself. Peter, afterall, was still sleeping in his transfigured form.
3) so I need you - three doors down
Your imitation of my walk
And the perfect way you talk
It's just a couple of the million things
That I love about you
Sirius couldn't help but feel a little offended at the series of corrections Moony was scribbling over his essay, and with such ease that he almost looked bored, sparing glances to his own homework between the big, red circles he was overlapping over every other sentence of Sirius's work (it was but for Remus's loving 'pre-checks' of work that Sirius intended to turn in, that Sirius ever passed half his classes).
Finally, annoyed and belligerent, Sirius stood up and over Remus's shoulder, pointing to one such mark. "And what's wrong with that one, eh?" Remus dared a second-long glance, then returned to marking and crossing out and circling. "Climatic and Climactic mean two different things, and I think you meant to say Climactic."
Sirius straightened, folded his arms over his chest. "No, I meant to say climatic." he said, factually.
Remus sat the quill down, turning in his seat to look at Sirius.
"So then, you found the ending of the book to have meteorological conditions that you needed to note in your essay?"
Sirius's lips went tight.
4) until I hear it from you - gin blossoms
Until I hear it from you
I can't let it get me off
Or break up my train of thought
As far as I know, nothing's wrong
until I hear it from you
Dumbledore looked stricken as he spoke the news, as did the rest of the order, but Remus found the things he said, the accusations, unreal - impossible. James and Lily weren't dead, they couldn't be. Not James Potter; James Potter who had been like an older brother; and Sirius - Sirius of summers spent longing, and schoolyears spent sneaking, of future plans - of future everything.
Well, that was just ludicrious, the notion Sirius would - could have had anything to do with such an impossible accusation at all. Remus said so, too. He said so until he felt hands gripping his shoulders, shaking him, shaking him hard and telling him to quiet down, now.
5) lost in the crowd - shinedown
And should I offer up my hand
and lay the guilt on myself
so it's easier for you not to stay.
They asked a series of questions that Sirius was free to answer, but he knew that nothing he could say would make a difference, in the end. His denial would only serve to prolonge Moony's pain - or worse, give him some futile cause to hand his life to, some romantic fool's notion he could petition enough to get Sirius released; noone was released from Azkaban, guilty or not.
No, the kindest thing he could do was to stay quiet when the time for denying it came, because he wanted Moony to walk away from this - walk away and never look back.
6) into dust - mazzy star
I could feel myself growing colder
I could feel myself under your fate
Under your fate
It was you breathless and tall
I could feel my eyes turning into dust
And two strangers turning into dust
Turning into dust
The verdict came, and with it, the sentence. The sound of it could be heard, not just in the rows where the rest of the order and the ministry sat, but from outside, in the hallway, where Remus stood with his eyes closed tightly and his back to the wall.
7) don't - jewel
Please let me forget
all those sweet smiles
all of the passion
all of the heat, the peace, the pain
all those blue skies
where your words were my freedom..
Sirius had dragged them so deep into the underbrush that Remus was having a tough time combatting the branches that reached out and snagged into his wool vest - one caught his tie and nearly choked him, for the pace Sirius was running with his hand grasped firmly around Remus's wrist.
It was the middle of august, when the leaves outside were just turning to tangerines and honeydew yellows, their feet cushioned into fallen beds of the autumn foliage as Sirius slowed, suffiently satisfied at how utterly lost he'd gotten them both, because lost meant lost, meant alone.
He looked beautiful, then. Turning around to face Remus, leaves and bits in his hair, perspiration dampening his skin. Tie half slung over one shoulder, the tail of his oxford shirt hanging haphazardly half-out of it's tuck. One hand still grapsing Remus's wrist as he smiled.
.
.
Remus sat up with a jolt, in his rented room, alone. It was the middle of august, and from the open window drifted in the heady scent of birch and blooming. The freshness of it was bittersweet, that the most he had left of the man he'd loved was a smell, a memory.
8) somwhere over the rainbow - tori amos
Somewhere over the rainbow
way up high there's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby
Somewhere over the rainbow
skies are blue and the dreams that you dare to dream
really do come true
Sirius didn't want to hear any more of Moony's apologies, so he closed the distance between them, lies and hurt and thirteen long years that needed to be worked through, and forgiven, and gotten over, taking the humbled man made of the quiet boy he'd known into his arms for one moment of uncomplicated honesty that had never stopped being honest, no matter the circumstances.
"I've never stopped loving you, Remus Lupin."
And the hands bracing against either side of his face and the desperate, long kiss, bodies that couldn't be close enough and the wet, hot tears that mashed from one face onto the other, told Sirius that Remus Lupin had never stopped loving him, either.