Boot To The Head!
Title: Romantic Chemistry
Authoress: ria_chan
Fandom-Pairing: Kurogane/Fai - Tsubasa RESERVoir CHRoNiCLE, Icchan/Kurogane - Angelic Layer/Tsubasa RESERVoir CHRoNiCLE
Disclaimer: All of 'em belong to CLAMP~
Rating-Warnings: PG-13 - Themes, Slash, Language
A/N: It was just an idea before minion_master egged me on. (hides) The original idea sparked after staring an art by imnotgaydammit too long to be healthy. Beware. This isn't pretty writing. Rough draft, no editing. (O_O)
He wouldn't be here if not for supplementary courses. Kurogane was determined to go to the grave with that mindset. He'd eve gone so far as to forget his materials and protest any work. He'd make sure this was a summer of Hell for the idiot teacher everybody loved. He sat, devising his plans for the most humiliating torment.
"ICCHAN GO BOOM!"
"What the Hell!?"
Kurogane fell backwards. He was so overwhelmed that he had crawled back until his back was against the wall. His heart was racing. Any more of a fright and he might have shit himself.
"I'm Icchan," the teacher said, crawling out of the air vent he'd popped through, "and I will be instructing year one chemistry summer session one."
Kurogane nodded, slowly. He purposely landed himself in this class to see what the fuss was about. How could this...freak be the favorite teacher among the school?
"Let's make this an easy three weeks, okay? For the both of us."
Again, Kurogane nodded. This time, though, he growled.
~O~
By day four, Kurogane was pulling his hair out. Icchan couldn't have been a worse teacher. The man sent him off on errands, ate crunchy food in the middle of lectures, and would smack him with a paper fan every time Kurogane answered a question incorrectly. He absolutely hated it!
"Now, Kurogane-Kun. This question is simple." The teacher tapped the workbook on the problem, in all its black-and-white glory. "Answer it."
Kurogane reluctantly returned to his problem. It was hard concentrating when the man was laughing loudly at a movie he was watching on his laptop. The only interaction between them was when Icchan would tap at the workbook.
"I feel like caramel popcorn. And cherry cola."
"That's a dangerous combination."
Icchan smiled thinly. For a moment, the muscles in his right arm spasmed, as if he was going to do something. He shifted around in his seat. "Indeed."
~O~
"Kurogane-Kun. What do you plan on getting out of this class?"
Kurogane dropped the bags that were filled to the brim with Icchan's cravings. That should have been a question asked on the first day. Not the middle of the second week.
He shrugged.
"Fai-Kun is set to be in third year chemistry," Icchan mused.
"Really."
A sinister smiled crossed Icchan's face. "Somehow, this leads me to believe there was another reason for you to take this class rather than simply meeting me"
"Whatever!"
"If you take chemistry year three in the Summer, next year, you'll be in year four with him that fall."
"So what?"
"What do you get by taking non-mandatory summer courses?"
"I like them! You got a problem with that?" He could feel his cheeks burning.
Icchan adjusted his glasses. "Go to the grocery store. I was to eat peaches."
"This time of year?"
The teacher grinned. "You do want to pass, right? You have fifteen minutes. Or I'll kill you."
~O~
Icchan was a crazy guy who poked his nose into business that wasn't his.
"-and then, just hold him close. You can whisper something sweet in his ear like, 'I really like you.' Admitting your feelings is one of the most important steps. Fai-Kun might be shy so you should grab him and-"
"What the Hell does this have to do with chemistry!?"
The teacher paused his dramatic gestures, poses to help Kurogane visually understand. "Well, I covered the material so I'm just moving on."
"What the Hell!?"
Icchan fluttered to his desk and pulled out two dolls. One was pretty with blond hair and the other was dark and slightly bigger. The first thought Kurogane had, of course, was him and Fai, though the Kuro-doll had longer hair than his and the Fai-doll was just a little bit tanner. The teacher laid one back-down on the desk and the other sitting on the hip. He locked their arms and smiled at Kurogane.
"So let's say you and Fai-Kun get into this position..."
"Seriously! Are you out of your fucking mind?"
"Oh? You don't want to do this with Fai-Kun?"
Kurogane nearly fainted. "I-I... I don't think about those things!"
Icchan frowned. He grabbed the Fai doll and pulled the cloth at its crotch so that it stayed up. "Well, if Fai-Kun likes you back, he'll probably want this, too."
Kurogane slammed his head in the desk. Thank God this was the last day.
"Roll him onot his stomach like this. You'll have to pull down his-"
"Enough! This is the last day. I'm just going to leave. I'm done!"
"Not so fast!" Icchan grabbed Kurogane by the wrist and pulled him to the front.
The teacher sat him into a chair and knelt between his legs. "Last lesson. If Fai-Kun ever puts you in a situation where you don't feel comfortable, you need to say, 'no.'"
Kurogane wouldn't just say no. He would beat the living Hell out of the bastard! Right now, he just couldn't push Icchan away.
"So let's say Fai-Kun persists after you say no." Icchan grabbed his crotch. "What do you do?"
Kurogane tried to kick the man away but Icchan wouldn't budge. "Wrong answer."
THe teacher opulled out his trusty paper fan and smacked Kurogane upside the head. "And shout, 'get the Hell off of me!' really loud."
"You keep the fuck off of me!" Kurogane roared. He stormed out of the classroom, this time for good.
~O~
"So how was Icchan-Sensei?" Fai asked.
Kurogane thanked everything holy in the world that Fai's locker was next to his. It wasn't easy to get a word in with the blond given how popular he was with the girls.
"He was a pervert."
Fai laughed. "Seriously? He's always so nice and energetic!"
"He'w weird," Kurogane added, slamming his locker shut. "Kept talking about how I was crushing on you."
"R-Really?" Fai's cerulean eyes widened. Kurogane wouldn't admit to thinking he was extra cute blushing like that... "Do you? C-Crush on me?"
"Of course not!" Kurogane threw his head to the side, glaring at random people that weren't Fai and didn't make him blush. Shit. This was heading down the the wrong path faster than the Kuro-doll had humped Fai-doll's legs.
"...Oh."
"If you word your feelings wrong, Fai-Kun might think you don't like him. In that case, you need to explain yourself immediately."
"That was a lie!" Why the Hell did he say that!?
"Apologize and kiss him."
Kurogane grabbed Fai's shoulders and awkwardly leaned over. Fai had wrapped his arms over his back. Those tiny arms were so tense, so unusually stiff. Kurogane couldn't say he was in a better boat.
"Not on the lips or cheek, though. That'll make him feel like a girl. That's never a good thing. You wouldn't want to be treated like a girl, would you?"
Kurogane squeezed his eyes shut. It was his first time kissing an ear. Kissing anything, truth be told. Ass soon as it was done, he pulled away. Tried to, anyways. Fai's hooked arms kept him in place, forced to stare at Fai's expression.
"U-Uh...I...am sorry...?"
One of Fai's hands reached up to touch the spot where Kurogane kissed him. An awkward smile was plastered against his face, flushed a pretty pink. "That was unexpected!"
Kurogane nodded. Nothing could save him from what he just did.
Fai bit his bottom lip uncertainly before kissing Kurogane's cheek.
"Just as repayment, you know. It's not like...weird...or something."
Kurogane nodded.
"W-Well," Fai said, breaking the silence, "are you doing anything this weekend?"
He shook his head. Fireworks were shooting inside his body. No way Fai actually asked him something like that.
"Then let's go somewhere nice." Fai twitched at the scary smile that was slowly creeping onto Kruogane's face. "Um. My class is starting so I have to go now. Bye-bye, Kuro-Chan!"
Kurogane stood idiotically in the hall for a long time. When he did finally move, it was to revel at how soft Fai's lips were. And what a scary good teacher Icchan was.
As if the devil spoke, Icchan passed by him, carrying a box of chemistry materials.
"I'm teaching chemistry third year next summer, just to you you know. Oh, and class has been in session for fifteen minutes. Hurry up and scram."
Kurogane knew he'd be taking that course, but the wink Icchan gave him sent shivers of dread down his back.
Afterthoughts: I'm scared to post this to tsubasarc. Anybody know if this would be acceptable at kuroganefai?
~B.T.A. Ria-Chan is dressed all pretty
Authoress: ria_chan
Fandom-Pairing: Kurogane/Fai - Tsubasa RESERVoir CHRoNiCLE, Icchan/Kurogane - Angelic Layer/Tsubasa RESERVoir CHRoNiCLE
Disclaimer: All of 'em belong to CLAMP~
Rating-Warnings: PG-13 - Themes, Slash, Language
A/N: It was just an idea before minion_master egged me on. (hides) The original idea sparked after staring an art by imnotgaydammit too long to be healthy. Beware. This isn't pretty writing. Rough draft, no editing. (O_O)
He wouldn't be here if not for supplementary courses. Kurogane was determined to go to the grave with that mindset. He'd eve gone so far as to forget his materials and protest any work. He'd make sure this was a summer of Hell for the idiot teacher everybody loved. He sat, devising his plans for the most humiliating torment.
"ICCHAN GO BOOM!"
"What the Hell!?"
Kurogane fell backwards. He was so overwhelmed that he had crawled back until his back was against the wall. His heart was racing. Any more of a fright and he might have shit himself.
"I'm Icchan," the teacher said, crawling out of the air vent he'd popped through, "and I will be instructing year one chemistry summer session one."
Kurogane nodded, slowly. He purposely landed himself in this class to see what the fuss was about. How could this...freak be the favorite teacher among the school?
"Let's make this an easy three weeks, okay? For the both of us."
Again, Kurogane nodded. This time, though, he growled.
~O~
By day four, Kurogane was pulling his hair out. Icchan couldn't have been a worse teacher. The man sent him off on errands, ate crunchy food in the middle of lectures, and would smack him with a paper fan every time Kurogane answered a question incorrectly. He absolutely hated it!
"Now, Kurogane-Kun. This question is simple." The teacher tapped the workbook on the problem, in all its black-and-white glory. "Answer it."
Kurogane reluctantly returned to his problem. It was hard concentrating when the man was laughing loudly at a movie he was watching on his laptop. The only interaction between them was when Icchan would tap at the workbook.
"I feel like caramel popcorn. And cherry cola."
"That's a dangerous combination."
Icchan smiled thinly. For a moment, the muscles in his right arm spasmed, as if he was going to do something. He shifted around in his seat. "Indeed."
~O~
"Kurogane-Kun. What do you plan on getting out of this class?"
Kurogane dropped the bags that were filled to the brim with Icchan's cravings. That should have been a question asked on the first day. Not the middle of the second week.
He shrugged.
"Fai-Kun is set to be in third year chemistry," Icchan mused.
"Really."
A sinister smiled crossed Icchan's face. "Somehow, this leads me to believe there was another reason for you to take this class rather than simply meeting me"
"Whatever!"
"If you take chemistry year three in the Summer, next year, you'll be in year four with him that fall."
"So what?"
"What do you get by taking non-mandatory summer courses?"
"I like them! You got a problem with that?" He could feel his cheeks burning.
Icchan adjusted his glasses. "Go to the grocery store. I was to eat peaches."
"This time of year?"
The teacher grinned. "You do want to pass, right? You have fifteen minutes. Or I'll kill you."
~O~
Icchan was a crazy guy who poked his nose into business that wasn't his.
"-and then, just hold him close. You can whisper something sweet in his ear like, 'I really like you.' Admitting your feelings is one of the most important steps. Fai-Kun might be shy so you should grab him and-"
"What the Hell does this have to do with chemistry!?"
The teacher paused his dramatic gestures, poses to help Kurogane visually understand. "Well, I covered the material so I'm just moving on."
"What the Hell!?"
Icchan fluttered to his desk and pulled out two dolls. One was pretty with blond hair and the other was dark and slightly bigger. The first thought Kurogane had, of course, was him and Fai, though the Kuro-doll had longer hair than his and the Fai-doll was just a little bit tanner. The teacher laid one back-down on the desk and the other sitting on the hip. He locked their arms and smiled at Kurogane.
"So let's say you and Fai-Kun get into this position..."
"Seriously! Are you out of your fucking mind?"
"Oh? You don't want to do this with Fai-Kun?"
Kurogane nearly fainted. "I-I... I don't think about those things!"
Icchan frowned. He grabbed the Fai doll and pulled the cloth at its crotch so that it stayed up. "Well, if Fai-Kun likes you back, he'll probably want this, too."
Kurogane slammed his head in the desk. Thank God this was the last day.
"Roll him onot his stomach like this. You'll have to pull down his-"
"Enough! This is the last day. I'm just going to leave. I'm done!"
"Not so fast!" Icchan grabbed Kurogane by the wrist and pulled him to the front.
The teacher sat him into a chair and knelt between his legs. "Last lesson. If Fai-Kun ever puts you in a situation where you don't feel comfortable, you need to say, 'no.'"
Kurogane wouldn't just say no. He would beat the living Hell out of the bastard! Right now, he just couldn't push Icchan away.
"So let's say Fai-Kun persists after you say no." Icchan grabbed his crotch. "What do you do?"
Kurogane tried to kick the man away but Icchan wouldn't budge. "Wrong answer."
THe teacher opulled out his trusty paper fan and smacked Kurogane upside the head. "And shout, 'get the Hell off of me!' really loud."
"You keep the fuck off of me!" Kurogane roared. He stormed out of the classroom, this time for good.
~O~
"So how was Icchan-Sensei?" Fai asked.
Kurogane thanked everything holy in the world that Fai's locker was next to his. It wasn't easy to get a word in with the blond given how popular he was with the girls.
"He was a pervert."
Fai laughed. "Seriously? He's always so nice and energetic!"
"He'w weird," Kurogane added, slamming his locker shut. "Kept talking about how I was crushing on you."
"R-Really?" Fai's cerulean eyes widened. Kurogane wouldn't admit to thinking he was extra cute blushing like that... "Do you? C-Crush on me?"
"Of course not!" Kurogane threw his head to the side, glaring at random people that weren't Fai and didn't make him blush. Shit. This was heading down the the wrong path faster than the Kuro-doll had humped Fai-doll's legs.
"...Oh."
"If you word your feelings wrong, Fai-Kun might think you don't like him. In that case, you need to explain yourself immediately."
"That was a lie!" Why the Hell did he say that!?
"Apologize and kiss him."
Kurogane grabbed Fai's shoulders and awkwardly leaned over. Fai had wrapped his arms over his back. Those tiny arms were so tense, so unusually stiff. Kurogane couldn't say he was in a better boat.
"Not on the lips or cheek, though. That'll make him feel like a girl. That's never a good thing. You wouldn't want to be treated like a girl, would you?"
Kurogane squeezed his eyes shut. It was his first time kissing an ear. Kissing anything, truth be told. Ass soon as it was done, he pulled away. Tried to, anyways. Fai's hooked arms kept him in place, forced to stare at Fai's expression.
"U-Uh...I...am sorry...?"
One of Fai's hands reached up to touch the spot where Kurogane kissed him. An awkward smile was plastered against his face, flushed a pretty pink. "That was unexpected!"
Kurogane nodded. Nothing could save him from what he just did.
Fai bit his bottom lip uncertainly before kissing Kurogane's cheek.
"Just as repayment, you know. It's not like...weird...or something."
Kurogane nodded.
"W-Well," Fai said, breaking the silence, "are you doing anything this weekend?"
He shook his head. Fireworks were shooting inside his body. No way Fai actually asked him something like that.
"Then let's go somewhere nice." Fai twitched at the scary smile that was slowly creeping onto Kruogane's face. "Um. My class is starting so I have to go now. Bye-bye, Kuro-Chan!"
Kurogane stood idiotically in the hall for a long time. When he did finally move, it was to revel at how soft Fai's lips were. And what a scary good teacher Icchan was.
As if the devil spoke, Icchan passed by him, carrying a box of chemistry materials.
"I'm teaching chemistry third year next summer, just to you you know. Oh, and class has been in session for fifteen minutes. Hurry up and scram."
Kurogane knew he'd be taking that course, but the wink Icchan gave him sent shivers of dread down his back.
Afterthoughts: I'm scared to post this to tsubasarc. Anybody know if this would be acceptable at kuroganefai?
~B.T.A. Ria-Chan is dressed all pretty