Pulse - Heechul/Gunhee
Title: Pulse
Pairing: Heechul/Gunhee
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Heechul has spent his entire life telling fate to go fuck itself
A/N: Raye tries to write one of those "soul mate" AU fics without making it completely cliche. The pacing in this might be horrible and it can't decide on a tone aaaaaaaaaaaaa. Actually this has...not other "pairings" per se but other relationships are mentioned between suju members that aren't heechul just so you are aware. the only one that is actually a romantic relationship is between ppl who are married irl so
“I met the person whose number matches mine today,” Sungmin said in the middle of their conversation before taking a delicate sip of his iced coffee.
“You don't seem happy,” Heechul noted. Of course he of all people would understand why one wouldn't be happy finding their “soul mate”, but while Sungmin was one of the few who actually liked to date people in between finding their soul mate he still believed when he did find his soul mate they would be a perfect match.
“I should be happy right? She's really cute and she was really nice when she approached me. Her name is Saeun,” Sungmin sighed.
“Oh,” Heechul said pointlessly when he realized the problem. Sungmin was a very open person so he liked to say he was bisexual, but everyone knew he leaned towards men. Really leaned towards men.
“Maybe you're right and these things don't know what they're doing,” Sungmin said, laying his wrist on the table and running a finger over the 10 digit number.
Heechul didn't even glance at his number not that he could even if he did it was always covered by his shirtsleeve or a couple bracelets anyway.
“It's not that I don't think they know what they're doing, though I suspected as much,” Heechul shrugged, “I just don't like being told what to do. Even by some omniscient force.”
*
Of course children started asking early what the number means.
Heechul got the standard response from his mom. There's one person in the world whose number matches yours and that person is your soul mate.
Heechul's response had been “I'm not going to be with someone just because a number tells me to.”
Heechul didn't remember that, but his mother told the story a lot.
*
Everyone who knew Heechul knew how he felt about the number. Most thought he was strange.
“Your number is special Heechul,” Siwon said, gripping his hand tightly, “God put it there to help you find your perfect match.”
“So you're telling me god only talks to us so he can tell us who to fuck?”
Siwon didn't talk about the number to Heechul anymore after that.
*
“Hey, wanna dance?”
“What's your number?”
Heechul just walked away whenever he heard that phrase. Ignoring the eyes staring at his wrist, trying to puzzle out what he'd carefully hidden.
“Why come to a club if you aren't going to dance with anyone if they aren't your stupid match,” Heechul muttered to himself.
Heechul had a good enough reason to hate this mark trying to tell him who he was meant to be with, but the universe just wanted to fuck him over more. Most people were more concerned with finding a match than having a good time.
Giving up on finding anyone to hang out with, Heechul wandered over to where the DJ was. He swayed by himself, taking a sip of his drink. He looked up at the stage the DJ is on and found he was actually pretty cute.
The DJ caught him staring and winked.
Oh.
Heechul smirked back and moved his hips more obviously than before. But of course the only guy here that seemed interested in having some fun was working.
The song ended and the DJ looked away. Heechul downed his drink and went back to the bar to get a refill. No point in hanging around here if he couldn't even talk to the guy.
Heechul wove his way through the crowd and back to the bar, ordering another drink. As soon as the drink was pushed into his hand there was a tap on his shoulder. Heechul turned and was surprised to see the DJ. Heechul glanced at the DJ booth and saw someone new there.
“Want to dance?” the man asked, looking at Heechul with clear interest.
“Shouldn't you be working?” Heechul teased, taking a sip of his drink.
“I got someone to fill in,” the man said, “Don't get people like you around here often.”
“And what kind of people would those be?”
“Those of the drop dead gorgeous variety,” the man held out his hand, “I'm Gunhee.”
“Heechul,” Heechul said in kind. He dropped his eyes from Gunhee's to his hand, reaching out to shake it.
He froze with an inch of space left between them when he saw the numbers on Gunhee's wrist. He only had to glance at them and he knew. He knew those numbers as well as he knew himself; had glared at them trying to erase them only to get the exact sequence burned into his brain instead.
Heechul pulled back as if he had been burned and quickly turned and disappeared through the crowd, dropping his still half full drink on the table and ignoring Gunhee-his soul mate calling his name.
*
“Um, are you okay?” Han Geng asked, peering into Heechul's room.
Heechul grunted.
“It's just that you kinda face planted on the bed when you got home and haven't moved for twenty minutes,” Han Geng scratched the back of his neck, “So as your best friend and roommate I'm concerned.”
Heechul rolled onto his side so he could talk to Han Geng. “This is the worst day of my life.”
“I'm pretty sure I've heard that one before,” Han Geng said, leaning against the door jab.
“I mean it this time,” Heechul said, sitting up, “I met him.”
“You're going to need more specific.”
“I met the one,” Heechul violently pushed the bracelets covering his wrist out of the way, “The one who matches this stupid number.”
Han Geng was quiet for a second. “You like him.”
Heechul sputtered. “What the hell are you talking about. I talked to him for like a minute before I noticed.”
Han Geng shrugged and walked into the room. “Then you're interested in him. If you hated him you would have immediately laughed it off that your soul mate was so wrong.”
Heechul flopped back onto the bed face first so he didn't have to admit that Han Geng might be just a little right.
*
Heechul figured the world was so big and it took him so long to even meet his match in the first place there was no reason to lock himself in his apartment for the rest of his life. Plus he'd been locked in his room for a week and Han Geng kicked him out to get groceries, but the reason he was a shut in for a week was definitely unrelated.
Still, Heechul pulled his jacket sleeve down over his number self-consciously as if it would send out a giant signal to Gunhee that Heechul was his soul mate and he was right here.
“Excuse me.”
Heechul spun around when he felt a tap on his shoulder and-oh damn that number was sending out a signal because there Gunhee was.
“Heechul, right?” Gunhee said, looking at him eagerly, “I'm Gunhee. We met at a club about a week ago remember?”
“Yeah,” Heechul mumbled, fighting the urge to run again. He didn't want to seem like a total weirdo especially because now that Heechul thought about it Gunhee didn't see his number.
“I just wanted to say I don't know what I did that made you run away, but whatever I did I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you.”
Heechul took a breathe. Good. He could just tell Gunhee it was fine and he didn't do anything and they could both be on their way. “It wasn't you. Something came up, so don't worry about it.” Heechul smiled reassuringly and started to walk away, but a tug on his sleeve stopped him.
“Wait, are you-”
Gunhee paused and Heechul turned to see what was wrong and realized with horror that Gunhee was staring at the number on his wrist, pulled into view by Gunhee's grip on his sleeve.
Heechul's adrenaline kicked in faster than ever and he pulled away from Gunhee and disappeared through a crowd once again before Gunhee could even recover.
*
Heechul morosely shoved another little triangle sandwich in his mouth. He saw Yesung slipping little pieces of his own sandwich to Kkoming.
“Why don't you just give it a chance?” Ryeowook asked, and Heechul slowly turned to look at him. Ryeowook glanced briefly at him before returning to cutting more vegetables for his own sandwich.
“Why should I do something just because a number tells me to?” Heechul questioned back. He glanced at Yesung's blank wrist and wanted to voice his envy of the two of them. But he was not heartless and he knew Yesung was still sensitive about his number disappearing when he was a teenager.
“If you were interested in him before you saw his number, then it's not the number dictating your actions really,” Ryeowook shrugged.
“I didn't want this,” Heechul blurted without thinking. As soon as it was out of his mouth of course he realized what he said and looked at Yesung putting down his food like he lost his appetite and Ryeowook putting down his knife. “Sorry.”
“Would you really be happier if that number disappeared right now?” Ryewook asked.
“No, it's not like I want this Gunhee guy to...” Heechul left the “die” unspoken, “I just want to feel like I have a choice.”
Ryeowook left the kitchen counter and at with Heechul and Yesung at the table. “You always have a choice. You know, my number disappeared when I was a baby so it never really meant anything to me.” Ryeowook glanced at Yesung when he said it. “My parents were the most concerned. They thought it would mean I would be alone forever, but I'm not alone. I have friends like you, and Henry, and Kyuhyun, and Zhou Mi, and everyone else.”
Yesung started pouting the longer Ryeowook went without mentioning him. Ryeowook leaned over and toucheed his shoulder. “And especially Yesung.” Yesung perked up then.
“I guess what I'm saying is my wrist is blank and I have all of the people in my life I could ever want. Your wrist has a number and you could still be alone all your life if you choose. But is that what you really want?”
“I have to go,” Heechul said, standing abruptly, “Thanks for lunch.”
“I'll walk you out,” Ryeowook said, also standing, “Yesung stop giving Kkoming table food.”
Yesung looked guilty and pulled his hand that was handing Kkoming a slice of ham back up.
“Can I just ask you one thing?” Heechul asked, stopping at the front door to Yesung and Ryeowook's apartment.
“Of course.”
“Would you rather have a number and be pressured to be with whoever had the same one or would you rather have things like they are where you got to meet Yesung naturally.”
Ryeowook blinked. “Yesung and I aren't together.”
Heechul eyes actually widened a little. “But every time someone asks about it you two avoid the question. What else could that mean?”
“We're not together like people with soul mates are,” Ryewook said wistfully, looking back at Yesung who had taken to playing with Kkoming, “But we're not really only friends either. I guess,” Ryeowook turned back to Heechul and smiled slightly in a way Heechul's never seen before, “I guess it's just something only people who have had the only person the universe says they are meant to be with ripped away from them would understand.”
*
“Hey, lover.”
Heechul nearly fell out of his seat on the subway when Gunhee suddenly appeaed next to him and said that.
“How the fuck do you keep showing up?” Heechul snapped at him, “I only saw you for the first time like two weeks ago.”
“Fate?” Gunhee held up his wrist with that accursed number on it and shrugged.
“I don't believe in fate,” Heechul said crossing his arms.
“I could've guessed,” Gunhee said, looking pointedly at Heechul's bracelet-covered wrist.
“Look, I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not going to do something just because a number on my wrist I didn't ask for told me to,” Heechul told him, “So let's just pretend we don't know each other.”
“You know, I might have agreed with you at one point, but then I found out my supposed soul mate was the most beautiful man I've ever seen and thought I'd give it a try.”
“The feeling isn't mutual,” Heechul said, steadfast.
“I would hope so, I don't see how you could look like that if you've never looked in a mirror,” Gunhee smirked.
Okay that was not funny or charming at all Heechul told himself. Because if he told himself that that meant it was true.
The subway stopped, announcing a location.
“This is my stop,” Heechul said, standing.
“Alright, see you later babe,” Gunhee called happily.
“No, you won't,” Heechul shouted, not looking back.
Heechul sighed when the doors closed behind him. He walked the rest of the four blocks to his apartment because that wasn't his stop.
*
“Why don't you just give it a shot? Knowing your luck he's probably just going to keep popping up until you give in,” Han Geng said after Heechul revealed what happened on his way home from work that day.
“I may have been slightly interested before, but I'm definitely know I don't like him now. He thinks he's so funny and good looking and he's always doing weird shit and he's gross,” Heechul complained.
“You literally just described yourself. Wow fate sure has a sick sense of humor,” Han Geng mused.
“I am not gross,” Heechul defended, but only the gross part.
“When we met you were wearing a shirt with a human figure encased in jello that said EAT ME OUT in English under it,” Han Geng pointed out.
“Yeah, that shirt is great and considering I met you while wearing it, accurate.”
Han Geng rolled his eyes. “Like I was saying just go on one date with him and try to keep an open mind about it for once.”
“Or I could take you everywhere with me until I run into him and pretend you're my boyfriend.”
*
“Yes, look Han Geng there he is!” Heechul whispered fiercely, grabbing Han Geng's arm.
“And it only took five days,” Han Geng sighed.
“Gunhee!” Heechul called happily to the man walking towards them. Of course he only sounded happy because he was about to get Gunhee off his back and not because he hadn't seen Gunhee in a while.
“Heechul,” Gunhee greeted, “And you're calling my name in ecstasy already what a surprise.”
“Oh my god Heechul he's perfect for you just marry him,” Han Geng blurted.
“Han Geng! The plan!” Heechul scolded, punching his arm.
“Let me guess,” Gunhee said, “The old we can't be together because I already have a boyfriend plan.”
“Yep,” Han Geng confirmed and Heechul glareed at him.
“I can't believe you! Some friend you are,” Heechul said and stomped off.
“Nice to meet you Gunhee. Good luck! You'll need it,” Han Geng called as he followed Heechul back through the crowd.
“Traitor!” Heechul shouted, walking away faster.
*
“Why didn't you tell me you met your soul mate?” Zhou Mi whineed as soon as he saw Heechul, “You need to tell me everything that happened. I want every detail.”
“That's exactly why I didn't tell you,” Heechul said, taking his laptop out of its case and placing it next to Kyuhyun's on the coffee table, “I don't really feel like reliving the worst day of my life.”
“I think you're exaggerating a little,” Kyuhyun said as Zhou Mi pouted.
“I met him at a club that's all,” Heechul said to console Zhou Mi, “It's not interesting.”
“I'm sure it's very interesting,” Zhou Mi said and sighed wistfully, “Meeting your soul mate is always romantic. I can't wait until it happens to me.”
“I will never understand how you can be so happy about this thing,” Heechul said, gesturing to his wrist, “If you already know who your soul mate is as soon as you look at their wrist how romantic can it be? Kyuhyun, you get what I mean right?”
“I don't think so,” Kyuhyun shook his head, “I'm actually very romantic. Imagine playing the most intense Starcraft game of your life. Your competitor is so great you have to know who they are. You ask their number and it matches yours! That's how it should be.”
Zhou Mi rolled his eyes. “You'll never find your soul mate like that. You should go out more Kyuhyun! Besides what if the person doesn't play Starcraft?”
“Then Heechul is right and this whole soul mate thing in bullshit.”
*
There was a slight possibility that Heechul hadn't gone out as much as usual since he first met Gunhee because it seemed like every time he went out he ran into him. But there were some things Heechul couldn't keep himself locked up for. Like hair care.
Besides there was a new salon that opened up down the block and Heechul had heard good things.
Heechul was convinced all those compliments from friends were lies when he saw Gunhee appear where his hairdresser should be.
“I want someone else,” Heechul said as soon as he realized Gunhee was meant to be his hairdresser.
“Sorry, everyone else is busy,” Gunhee said and winked at the girl next to him who clearly didn't have a customer at the moment. The girl giggled and Heechul suddenly didn't want her doing his hair either.
“Fine,” Heechul sniffed, “Then I want to speak to the owner.”
Gunhee sighed. “Alright,” he said and turns around, facing Heechul again with a more serious face, “What seems to be the problem.”
The hairdressers around them started giggling. Heechul was half way to fighting the whole salon. “Are you making fun of me?”
“No, it's just that I'm the owner of this salon,” Gunhee said with a not-at-all-heart-stopping smile.
“The J?” Heechul asked with a raised eyebrow.
“My last name is Jeon,” Gunhee explained.
“Jeon Gunhee,” Heechul said.
Gunhee scratched his neck. “Technically Jeon Younghun. I just go by Gunhee.”
Heechul eyes narrowed. “And you were just going to let me go thinking Gunhee was your real name forever?”
“Oh Heechul, I didn't know you cared,” Gunhee said looking pleased.
“I'm leaving,” Heechul announced, turning on his heel.
“Hey, come on,” Gunhee said, “I'm sorry for teasing. Let me do your hair, I'll give you the soul mate discount.”
Heechul slowly turned to face Gunhee again. “Fine, but only for the discount.”
“Stupid, vain, smug-” Heechul mumbled, stalking into the house and to his bedroom.
“You meet Gunhee again?” Han Geng caled, but received no answer.
“I hate him,” Heechul said, glaring into the mirror on his dresser.
Damn, his hair looked good.
*
“I think you should give him a chance,” Sungmin said when he and Heechul met up for another cafe date.
“Et tu, Sungmin?” Heechul asked, “Of all people I thought you would understand.”
“I will never understand you Heechul,” Sungmin said with a sweet smile, “And stop being a drama queen. You know as well as anyone how I felt when I first met Saeun, but I gave it a chance and look at us now. We're engaged.”
“Well Saeun isn't obnoxious,” Heechul said.
“No, she isn't,” Sungmin said looking pointedly at Heechul.
“Oh, shut up.”
*
“So, listen, do you want to go on a date or something?” Gunhee asked, randomly appearing like usual while Heechul was on his way home from work.
“Okay,” slipped out of Heechul's mouth before he could even think about the implications and Gunhee looked about as surprised as he did. “I mean,” Heechul cleared his throat, “Just to hang out not like a real date. And only because all of my friends have betrayed me.”
“Your friends betrayed you?” Gunhee frowned.
“Yeah, they all keep telling me I should go out with you.”
*
“What are you doing here Heechul, you never come over,” Eunhyuk asked when he saw a despondent Heechul on his couch.
“Everyone abandoned me,” Heechul bemoaned.
Donghae looked up from where he was patting Heechul comfortingly and gestured to his wrist.
“Oh yeah, the soul mate thing,” Eunhyuk sighed.
Heechul sat up. “Hey, you guys are on my side, right?” he asked, “You two have matching numbers and you're not dating.”
“Sorry Heechul, I'm with everyone else,” Eunhyuk admitted.
Heechul looked hopefully at Donghae, but he shrugged and disappeared somewhere deeper into the apartment.
“It's not like we never gave it a shot. We tried dating multiple times since we met when he were teenagers. It just never felt right.”
“If you know its not going to work why do you still try?” Heechul asked.
“Well we don't anymore. Donghae met someone apparently. I don't know anything about him though, just that he's a guy because he says 'my boyfriend'. He could be dating an alien for all I know and for what I know about Donghae.”
Heechul had to agree.
Eunhyuk sat down next to Heechul on the couch. “I know you're really into the idea of not being with your soul mate, but do you ever wonder if it's not all it's cracked up to be?”
“It's my decision.”
“I'm just saying Donghae and I don't feel that way about each other, but here we are. We've been living together since we were nineteen because our families know we match and that's what is expected. If you don't you have to explain to everyone why not. I don't even know how to explain it to myself I mean I love Donghae just not like that. Not to mention I haven't had a girlfriend in years.”
“I can tell,” Heechul said.
Eunhyuk looked like he wanted to push Heechul, but knew he didn't have the privilege. “I'm just thinking if I had the opportunity to really love the person I was destined for I'd be happy. You may see it as a freedom not to follow your destiny, but as someone who can't seem to follow it I've never felt so trapped.”
*
Heechul couldn't believe he was standing in front of the door to Gunhee's apartment about to go on a--hang out with him. When Heechul asked what they were going to do Gunhee said they would figure it out and gave Heechul his address, asking if he could be there at six.
Still, he didn't get dressed up (not that dressed up though) and walk here just to turn around like a coward.
Heechul knocked on the door sharply, two times.
“Just a second,” a voice called from behind the door.
Gunhee opened the door just as he was pulling his t-shirt over his head, giving Heechul a short glimpse of well-defined abdominal muscles Heechul did not expect to see.
“Hey, ready to go?” Gunhee asked, smiling. If he noticed Heechul still gaping at his covered stomach he didn't say anything.
“That's why I'm here,” Heechul said, forcing his eyes to meet Gunhee's, “Do you even know where we're going?”
“That depends how you feel about sushi.”
“Wow, you can almost eat as much as me,” Gunhee noted while Heechul's shoves another bite into his mouth.
“Please,” Heechul snorted, mouth still full, “I'm matching you plate for plate.” He gestured to the two stacks of plates next to them, both the same height.
“I'm also the wasabi master though so I still win,” Gunhee said, taking a large chunk of the stuff and holding it up.
“Uh huh, and what are you going to do with that genuis,” Heechul asked, calling the bluff.
Gunhee unceremoniously stuffed the wasabi into his mouth and Heechul's eyes widened. Of course two seconds later Gunhee's face was red and he had tears coming out of his eyes.
Heechul couldn't help it; he started laughing. He laughed until he had tears coming out of his eyes too.
“Holy shit,” Gunhee said once he was somewhat recovered. He grabbed a napkin and wiped the snot from his nose.
“Why the hell would you do that? Are you crazy?” Heechul asked once he could breathe.
“Made you laugh though, didn't it?” Gunhee asked, tears still in his eyes.
“Oh please,” Heechul replied but he was still smiling.
“Do you want to come up?” Gunhee asked awkwardly when they reached his apartment, “For coffee or something?”
Heechul must have drank too much at the sushi bar, wait, he didn't have any alcohol, something went wrong then because Heechul agreed.
“I'll go turn on the coffeemaker, you can sit anywhere,” Gunhee said, disappearing into what Heechul assumed was the kitchen.
“Oh, you were serious about the coffee part,” Heechul noted looking around the place. The place was pretty modern and stylishly decorated which Heechul could appreciate. Wait, was that a giant stuffed kangaroo? Weird.
“Do you want cream or sugar?” Gunhee called.
“Both,” Heechul replied, finally sitting on the couch.
Gunhee reappeared a minute later with two steaming mugs.
Heechul took the one offered to him and briefly wondered what the hell he was doing here. He was doing exactly what he said he'd never do.
Just as he was thinking Gunhee sat next to Heechul and Gunhee's just-tight-enough shirt highlighted Gunhee's defined pectorals.
Fuck me, Heechul thought taking a sip of his coffee and ignoring his burning tongue.
It was silent for a minute which was strange when Heechul was with Gunhee so he turned to look at the other man. Gunhee was staring at his wrist and Heechul looked at it as well and realized he didn't put on his bracelets today. Not that there was a point anymore.
“I think that's only the second time I've seen it,” Gunhee noted. He held out his own arm, wrist facing up. Heechul looked between their wrists. A perfect match.
“I hate this thing,” Heechul said even though he knew Gunhee already knew, “I hate being told what to do.”
“I kinda hate it too,” Gunhee admitted, “I'm really curious if you would like me if it wasn't for this thing.”
“Don't be stupid,” Heechul said, “It's not like I don't like you I just don't like this thing.”
Gunhee just hummed. Probably because he knew that already like everyone else in the world seemed to. Gunhee reached over slowly, like he was afraid Heechul would pull away at any second, and ran a finger over the number.
“Do you know why it's on the wrist?” he asked, looking into Heechul's eyes, “Because that's where your pulse is. Your heartbeat.”
Heechul rolled his eyes. That was probably the cheesiest thing he had ever heard.
“And it wouldn't work out well if the number was right over your heart. Then we'd all be looking at each other's boobs in public. More than usual,” Gunhee finished with a grin.
Heechul chuckled. “I don't have boobs,” he said, “You however might want to invest in a bra.”
Gunhee looked down at himself. “I like to work out. You don't like it?” Gunhee looked worried at the idea.
Heechul couldn't seem to take his eyes off Gunhee's chest now that he mentioned it.
“Um, Heechul?”
*
“I know you're awake,” Gunhee said, poking Heechul's bare arm.
“No I'm not,” Heechul said, burrowing under Gunhee's covers, “I'm not even here right now. You probably think I'm the worst person sleeping with you as soon as I found out you're ripped.”
Gunhee laughed. “I think a lot of things about you Heechul. The worst isn't one of those things,” he assured, “Actually I thought you were giving in to the unbearable sexual tension, but I can deal with you just being into my totally hot body too.”
“My life wasn't supposed to go like this,” Heechul said, coming out of hiding.
“You're telling me,” Gunhee said, “But if you want I can go take a shower and you can sneak out and pretend this was a one night thing. Then I'll probably see you next week.”
Gunhee moved to stand and Heechul got another view of those damn abs. “Wait,” Heechul grabbed Gunhee's wrist, “Look I know I've been a pill okay?”
“Maybe a pill and a half,” Gunhee joked, sitting back down.
“I've just spent my entire life thinking I wasn't going to end up with you,” Heechul said, “My match. But of course you had to be...”
Perfect.
“But you don't like me because we're 'soul mates', do you?” Gunhee asked, hopeful.
“No,” Heechul admitted, “I like you because you have a hot body.” Gunhee snorted. “And because you do stupid shit to make me laugh. And you do my hair perfectly.”
Gunhee leaned forward and kissed Heechul. “That's the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me.”
“That's sad,” Heechul said, trying not to smile and Gunhee hit him playfully.
“Can you give this a shot? Please?” Gunhee asked sincerely, taking Heechul's hand.
“Fuck it,” Heechul said, smiling and kissing Gunhee, “Just don't tell my friends.”