Gee
I wonder if anyone ever reads my journal. Granted, I never, ever post. Maybe it's because I don't post. Oh well.
I've decided that things change, and always change for a reason. Be it good or bad, things change.
Things in my own life have changed drasticly over the past several months. I've decided to accept bad things from the past as just that, the past. Those bad things happen for a reason and then must move past it. Sometimes I seem to dwell on the bad and pull myself down into the depths. I hate that feeling. Hate holding resentment. I hate hating. It should be just like the phrase: "Always look on the bright side of life!" It's going to become my new attitude.
Sure things will always bring me down. I've been told that I'm a gloomy person, always negative. That I always look at the bad. That I never have a positive attitude, or outlook. I look at it as reality! The world isn't perfect. Things really do go wrong. But my point is, I'm not going to dwell on it. Not going to let it bug me. Just move past it.
Now, my point of this post is for a certain thing. I'm glad it happened, and it honestly changed my outlook on a few things in just a blink of a second. It's about forgivness. Forgivness isn't for the person you're forgiving, it's about YOU. It's about the person who is forgiving.
In the past I've said a few choice words about a certain subject (yes being vague for a reason) that was taken quite close to heart. I hurt a persons feelings. Really hurt them. At the time I said certain comments, I was angry. I was hurt myself and upset. What I said was uncalled for, but it was said out of anger. Yes, that's no excuse. The first way to solve that anger and hurt is to forgive and get over yourself about what it is that made you angry in the first place. To understand and finally sit back and look at the entire picture. After over a full year (yeah that long), I can finally look back and say, "geesh I was angry/hurt/pissed whatever, and what I said hurt some feelings. I'm wrong and sorry" Now the forgiving comes from what happened AFTER I said those hurtful things. Things were said back about me that hurt me. (eye for an eye)? Maybe. But, in the end maybe both sides were wrong. BUT, I forgive that anger that was shown towards me. Why am I forgiving? I'm a nice guy? nah I'm as much as a dick as the next Joe. We all are. I'm forgiving because I felt me, in turn, was forgiven. At least that's how I took it.
I saw and chatted with someone today that I hadn't seen in almost a year (the said person above). A very pleasant conversation ensured and I was suprised. I didn't expect it. And truth be told, I'm very glad it was a true, honest conversation. Now, I don't know where it was to lead, because it was brief, but I really felt good about it. I was almost shocked. That is the reason for my post. Was the chat for forgivness? Not sure. Was it to clear the air of bad blood? Perhaps. Was it just a pleasant conversation from 2 people who hadn't seen each other in a year? Maybe. But, in just a few short minutes, it actually had an impact on me. To me, it was a heartfelt conversation.
Now, who I am referring to is on LJ. I don't think even many people even read my journal anymore (as I stated above) and this person may not even see this post. I hope this person does actually. They might not realize it at first, but I hope this person does. Again, I am not stating who it is, or even what the true conversation was about. That's not the point of this post. For me, and yeah, right now it's about me, it's about getting over things and moving on with life. Because believe me, there is much more to life than petty fights. And honestly, that's what had transpired over a year ago. I hope personally all is forgiven. It can be on my end, and I hope on the other end it can be as well, and things can be forgotten.
Damn, I actually feel good for once. Wow.
I've decided that things change, and always change for a reason. Be it good or bad, things change.
Things in my own life have changed drasticly over the past several months. I've decided to accept bad things from the past as just that, the past. Those bad things happen for a reason and then must move past it. Sometimes I seem to dwell on the bad and pull myself down into the depths. I hate that feeling. Hate holding resentment. I hate hating. It should be just like the phrase: "Always look on the bright side of life!" It's going to become my new attitude.
Sure things will always bring me down. I've been told that I'm a gloomy person, always negative. That I always look at the bad. That I never have a positive attitude, or outlook. I look at it as reality! The world isn't perfect. Things really do go wrong. But my point is, I'm not going to dwell on it. Not going to let it bug me. Just move past it.
Now, my point of this post is for a certain thing. I'm glad it happened, and it honestly changed my outlook on a few things in just a blink of a second. It's about forgivness. Forgivness isn't for the person you're forgiving, it's about YOU. It's about the person who is forgiving.
In the past I've said a few choice words about a certain subject (yes being vague for a reason) that was taken quite close to heart. I hurt a persons feelings. Really hurt them. At the time I said certain comments, I was angry. I was hurt myself and upset. What I said was uncalled for, but it was said out of anger. Yes, that's no excuse. The first way to solve that anger and hurt is to forgive and get over yourself about what it is that made you angry in the first place. To understand and finally sit back and look at the entire picture. After over a full year (yeah that long), I can finally look back and say, "geesh I was angry/hurt/pissed whatever, and what I said hurt some feelings. I'm wrong and sorry" Now the forgiving comes from what happened AFTER I said those hurtful things. Things were said back about me that hurt me. (eye for an eye)? Maybe. But, in the end maybe both sides were wrong. BUT, I forgive that anger that was shown towards me. Why am I forgiving? I'm a nice guy? nah I'm as much as a dick as the next Joe. We all are. I'm forgiving because I felt me, in turn, was forgiven. At least that's how I took it.
I saw and chatted with someone today that I hadn't seen in almost a year (the said person above). A very pleasant conversation ensured and I was suprised. I didn't expect it. And truth be told, I'm very glad it was a true, honest conversation. Now, I don't know where it was to lead, because it was brief, but I really felt good about it. I was almost shocked. That is the reason for my post. Was the chat for forgivness? Not sure. Was it to clear the air of bad blood? Perhaps. Was it just a pleasant conversation from 2 people who hadn't seen each other in a year? Maybe. But, in just a few short minutes, it actually had an impact on me. To me, it was a heartfelt conversation.
Now, who I am referring to is on LJ. I don't think even many people even read my journal anymore (as I stated above) and this person may not even see this post. I hope this person does actually. They might not realize it at first, but I hope this person does. Again, I am not stating who it is, or even what the true conversation was about. That's not the point of this post. For me, and yeah, right now it's about me, it's about getting over things and moving on with life. Because believe me, there is much more to life than petty fights. And honestly, that's what had transpired over a year ago. I hope personally all is forgiven. It can be on my end, and I hope on the other end it can be as well, and things can be forgotten.
Damn, I actually feel good for once. Wow.