The Coming Out Day Clearance Post
Monday was National Coming Out Day. I've never been a huge proponent of doing something simply because someone put it on a calendar, created ribbons for it, and printed up pricey flyers festooned with images of celebrities touting the wonderment of the day. By the same token, the decision to come out is a deeply personal decision that I don't think someone can put on a calendar and think, "Yes! Today is the day I HAVE to spin the wheel of fate to see if my friends and family still love me." It's not like the Great American Smokeout. It's not something you can undo if it becomes too hard. Coming out is a major step in life that no one should take lightly, nor should they feel obligated to do so, because the HRC's celebrity du jour says so. Come out when you're emotionally ready. Period. Because you can only do it once, and there is no going back.
This year National Coming Out Day fell on the heels of several publicized gay suicides after some form of bullying or harassment, and I've been finding myself thinking about that a bit more. I am glad to see several celebrities, gay and gay friendly, participating in columnist Dan Savage's It Gets Better Project on YouTube (Damn you, Tim Gunn, for making me cry!). I'm heartened to see so many average Joes and Josies posting videos of their own that let our gay youth know that they are special, loved, supported, and that there is help for them if they're bullied, beaten, depressed, or in despair. The videos are testimonies that acknowledge what gay and transgendered teens go through is incredibly hard and heartbreaking, but they are not alone. There is help. There is support. There is a light in the world. It does get better.
So, while this post is a day late for National Coming Out Day, and it's only tangentally related to it, I don't think I can wait 364 days to set it loose into the world so that it's "timely." Regardless of whether you're gay, straight, out, or in, there are ways you can do some good in our community and help the next generation. Make a video, and post it to the It Gets Better Project channel on YouTube. Contribute to, or otherwise support, The Trevor Project. Become a mentor to gay youth in your local community. Be there for someone when they need a shoulder to lean on or an ear to bend. These are things you can do every day of the week. No ribbon necessary. I guarantee at least one other human being on earth will be thankful you did.