On My Own....
So, I've decided that if I lived alone I would either get a second job so that I was never not working, or I would be the neatest person on earth. No joke. I'm serious here. Ethan has been asleep since about... 6:30 or so... and I have cleaned the kitchen, sorted through all the old mail I could find, done two loads of laundry, put away everything that was stacked on top of the dryer, worked on real estate stuff, and taken a shower. I hate the silence, and I think it might drive me insane. I was bummed before I came home. Coming home and having nothing to take my mind off my bummed-ness isn't cool. So I have mixed feelings between wanting to just yell at Ethan to wake up, or just let him sleep until morning. Oh.. as a side note, we haven't had dinner b/c he wasn't hungry when he fell asleep, and I'm too bummed to really care that much. So.... I would really just let Ethan sleep until morning... but he's fully clothed.... he even has his sneakers on.... in my bed.... GRRRRRRR. But that's an issue for another time. I just don't know how he can sleep with shoes on. He's gonna ruin his ankles... or something... whatever. Anyway, blah blah blah. I hate being alone. Really do. Can't tell you how much. Another thing, though, is that if I lived alone I would never sleep. B/c I can't seem to make myself want to go to bed as it is. I'm tired.... but I'm so tense from the lack of someone to talk to or at least noises from something that I think I could challenge a violin string at the moment. I'm jumpy too. Like REALLY jumpy. When the dogs make noise I have to peel myself back off the ceiling. Crazy, eh? I am pathetic, really. I didn't know that I was this bad off. I'm not always. I guess it's just that Ethan's been recluse all week, and I've been alone all day during the days, so basically I've had next to know real interaction with anyone since Sunday.... and it's Thursday. I saw Tessa briefly... but I'm too sure that counts. It was SO brief. Well.. that's about all. I guess I ought to go make my husband get his nasty grubby sneakers out of my bed. Or something. Sheesh!