whatever
i don't know what to do anymore. i really wish with all of my heart that i could just take back some things. and that now that i think about it, that every single person i actually care about either didn't:
a) get hurt by something retarded i did, OR
b) think a lot less of me than they did oh say about a year ago.
it just makes me really upset thinking about the person i've become. because honestly i don't even like MYSELF anymore. let alone think it's fair for anybody else to ever forgive/forget about crap involving me. i mean granted i know all my friends don't hate me but it's just really hard to now forever be the fuck up. like honestly i didn't always hate myself. i used to seriously be a good friend. i didn't drive myself crazy by thinking every day about things i couldn't change. i had a boyfriend who trusted me and i loved a lot.
well now i don't know what to do and it's really hard when you find no reason to even stick up for yourself anymore.
im getting rid of this journal bye guys.
a) get hurt by something retarded i did, OR
b) think a lot less of me than they did oh say about a year ago.
it just makes me really upset thinking about the person i've become. because honestly i don't even like MYSELF anymore. let alone think it's fair for anybody else to ever forgive/forget about crap involving me. i mean granted i know all my friends don't hate me but it's just really hard to now forever be the fuck up. like honestly i didn't always hate myself. i used to seriously be a good friend. i didn't drive myself crazy by thinking every day about things i couldn't change. i had a boyfriend who trusted me and i loved a lot.
well now i don't know what to do and it's really hard when you find no reason to even stick up for yourself anymore.
im getting rid of this journal bye guys.