(no subject)
as many of my friends have decided to point out lately, i'm rapidly losing my hearing. at least half of all my conversations consist of "what?! huh?! wuh?!" i'm not sure if it's because i'm just not paying attention, or if i'm really damaging my eardrums. people have pointed out that i turn my music way up, or when i'm at a show, i stand way close to the speakers. the closer i stand, the more it damages my ears..so i can't hear. and then i stand even closer to speakers, and i play my music even louder. catch 22 anyone?
i don't mind. when i'm old and i can't hear a damned thing, it'll be my excuse to ignore everyone talking to me. and i'll just play music in my head. cuz i'm crazy like that.
so i've been having a little trouble sleeping lately.
- - - but before that, i must say that i'm having a quite..strange..case of..i guess vertigo..right now. things are spinning a little..but at the same time i feel as if i should lean toward my left just to stay upright. i'm not sure if it's like that if i turn around..since i'm sitting. let me check....nope. it's not directional. it's just..left. i must lean toward the left. - - -
okay back to the sleeping difficulties. i've never been one to sleep immediately after i pull the covers over my head [like my roommate. she doesn't even get comfortable. she hits the bed and she's gone.] but i've been having significantly more trouble falling asleep. i suffer for about an hour or two reviewing occurances of the day in my head. events that could or could not be improved had i been a little quicker, a little wittier. by the time i go to sleep i'm really really stressed. and my dreams don't turn out so well due to said stress.
i'm sure some of you have played grand theft auto. imagine the stress of having policeman chasing after you everywhere because you shot a cop. even if it's just in the game. but have that stress raised so that it's apparent in real life. and then multiply it a few times because everything's much worse in nightmares. i had an entire night of running away from the police because someone i was with shot one and stole their car. and imagine that while you are with two other people, that car you're in suddenly turns into a bike. so that you and someone else are on the bike..and the third person is being dragged from a rope. for a whole fucking night!
okay so obviously i wake up really really stressed and on edge because the feelings from dreams linger into wakefulness. and somewhere in the back of my mind i have to keep telling myself to calm down because i did NOT shoot anyone, nor did i steal any cars or donuts. now all of this sasser worm business is entering my dreams.
story time! last night i had a dream where i travelled back in time and this behemoth of a computer got the first virus in history. but it was cured by some guy name norton [ooh i'm so creative.] and then miraculously the monstrosity turned into a human being. he was fucking huge. and he stepped on norton. like..what the fuck, right? he just cured your ass, you ungrateful motherfucker. but ah-HA! karma said "your ass is mine." and our jolly green giant got a splinter from norton's pocket protector and he died of an infection. the end.
i don't know if i'll sound bitchy saying this, but have you ever had someone in your class that you think to yourself, "geezus. that fucker looks annoying?" like..they haven't spoken yet. they haven't done anything except exist, but somehow, someway there's something making them look fucking annoying? i must admit that's happened to me a few times, and often i'm looking to prove whether or not it's true. but the other day, one of them stood up to talk. i'd always thought that she looked annoying. and she opened her mouth to speak. i was actually quite pleased to know that i was completely right. she spoke in a way so that every word she said sounded like the end of a question and it rose in intonation. imagine having to listen to someone speak like that. then imagine having to listen to someone speak like that about don quixote and its themes. then throw in a couple of ums, likes, whatevers, and annoying little squeaks which i can only assume were laughter.
but i digress. i'm going to try to fix this odd left-vertigo thing. and i'm going to try to gain my hearing back. does anyone know if listening to softer things will help my hearing? would it develop back if i stopped listening to loud shit?
ah fuck it. whatever.
hit this shit
--e--
survey time!
what would you do/think if you were allowed to love only one person at a time?
++addendum++
why does it sound so nice for people who have two syllables in their last name to be called BY their last name? cooper? cohen? instead of calling christina by her first name, i'm going to call her chacon. why can't my name work? chiu? NO! don't call me chiu! that's a terrible name! damn chinese last names. they're all one syllable and they're all terrible first names. "hey, wong," or "hey, chang." see it doesn't sound as cool as "chacon, how you doing?" or "cooper, how's it going?" i love my family. i love my ancestors. i don't like the sound of my last name so much. maybe i'll get married to someone with a cool last name so i can be called that. in fact, i don't like my first name either. i think i've mentioned this before. emily? it's so..old fashioned. and snobby. and..english. i'm boring. give me a new name. what should it be, guys?
i don't mind. when i'm old and i can't hear a damned thing, it'll be my excuse to ignore everyone talking to me. and i'll just play music in my head. cuz i'm crazy like that.
so i've been having a little trouble sleeping lately.
- - - but before that, i must say that i'm having a quite..strange..case of..i guess vertigo..right now. things are spinning a little..but at the same time i feel as if i should lean toward my left just to stay upright. i'm not sure if it's like that if i turn around..since i'm sitting. let me check....nope. it's not directional. it's just..left. i must lean toward the left. - - -
okay back to the sleeping difficulties. i've never been one to sleep immediately after i pull the covers over my head [like my roommate. she doesn't even get comfortable. she hits the bed and she's gone.] but i've been having significantly more trouble falling asleep. i suffer for about an hour or two reviewing occurances of the day in my head. events that could or could not be improved had i been a little quicker, a little wittier. by the time i go to sleep i'm really really stressed. and my dreams don't turn out so well due to said stress.
i'm sure some of you have played grand theft auto. imagine the stress of having policeman chasing after you everywhere because you shot a cop. even if it's just in the game. but have that stress raised so that it's apparent in real life. and then multiply it a few times because everything's much worse in nightmares. i had an entire night of running away from the police because someone i was with shot one and stole their car. and imagine that while you are with two other people, that car you're in suddenly turns into a bike. so that you and someone else are on the bike..and the third person is being dragged from a rope. for a whole fucking night!
okay so obviously i wake up really really stressed and on edge because the feelings from dreams linger into wakefulness. and somewhere in the back of my mind i have to keep telling myself to calm down because i did NOT shoot anyone, nor did i steal any cars or donuts. now all of this sasser worm business is entering my dreams.
story time! last night i had a dream where i travelled back in time and this behemoth of a computer got the first virus in history. but it was cured by some guy name norton [ooh i'm so creative.] and then miraculously the monstrosity turned into a human being. he was fucking huge. and he stepped on norton. like..what the fuck, right? he just cured your ass, you ungrateful motherfucker. but ah-HA! karma said "your ass is mine." and our jolly green giant got a splinter from norton's pocket protector and he died of an infection. the end.
i don't know if i'll sound bitchy saying this, but have you ever had someone in your class that you think to yourself, "geezus. that fucker looks annoying?" like..they haven't spoken yet. they haven't done anything except exist, but somehow, someway there's something making them look fucking annoying? i must admit that's happened to me a few times, and often i'm looking to prove whether or not it's true. but the other day, one of them stood up to talk. i'd always thought that she looked annoying. and she opened her mouth to speak. i was actually quite pleased to know that i was completely right. she spoke in a way so that every word she said sounded like the end of a question and it rose in intonation. imagine having to listen to someone speak like that. then imagine having to listen to someone speak like that about don quixote and its themes. then throw in a couple of ums, likes, whatevers, and annoying little squeaks which i can only assume were laughter.
but i digress. i'm going to try to fix this odd left-vertigo thing. and i'm going to try to gain my hearing back. does anyone know if listening to softer things will help my hearing? would it develop back if i stopped listening to loud shit?
ah fuck it. whatever.
hit this shit
--e--
survey time!
what would you do/think if you were allowed to love only one person at a time?
++addendum++
why does it sound so nice for people who have two syllables in their last name to be called BY their last name? cooper? cohen? instead of calling christina by her first name, i'm going to call her chacon. why can't my name work? chiu? NO! don't call me chiu! that's a terrible name! damn chinese last names. they're all one syllable and they're all terrible first names. "hey, wong," or "hey, chang." see it doesn't sound as cool as "chacon, how you doing?" or "cooper, how's it going?" i love my family. i love my ancestors. i don't like the sound of my last name so much. maybe i'll get married to someone with a cool last name so i can be called that. in fact, i don't like my first name either. i think i've mentioned this before. emily? it's so..old fashioned. and snobby. and..english. i'm boring. give me a new name. what should it be, guys?