Denial II, chapter 31: The Garden of Earthly Delights
Title: Denial II, chapter 31: The Garden of Earthly Delights
Author: wastingyourgum
Characters/Pairings: Little John, Much, Eleanor
Rating: PG
Genre: Gen with the teeniest hint of slash and het
Words: 1450
Disclaimer: BBC & TA own; we just want to play in their universe
Notes: Beta'd by jagnikjen & robinfanatic; takes place after AU 2x13 but prior to 3x01
Introduction and chapter links for Denial II are here...
Summary: John tries to come to terms with what he's just witnessed in Carter's room - with a little help from Much...
>>>---------------->>
Chapter 31: The Garden of Earthly Delights
by wastingyourgum
John walked to a quiet spot in the garden and sat on a stone bench under a tree, placing his head in his hands.
So Legrand and Carter had...had... Who cared? He certainly didn't. Why should he? He was the queen's lover and besides, men shouldn't... do that with other men. It wasn't right.
His memory flashed back to that brief glimpse of long legs, smooth bodies, tight muscles.
God, he looked good naked...and no need to wonder what Much ever saw in Carter either.
John shook his head.
Do not do this. Don't think about it. Don't think about him. It's wrong!
"It's Legrand, isn't it?"
"What?" John looked up, startled. Much was standing in front of him.
"You're upset he's not talking to you any more."
"Yes...." Amongst other things.
"And you are more than just friends, aren't you?" Much sounded almost scolding in his tone.
John realised Much probably knew full well what was going on and had for some time. It must have hurt him that John had kept on denying it. He took a deep breath then replied in a low voice, "Yes."
He flinched in surprise as Much hugged him tightly. "Thank you for telling me, John."
"It's not like you and Carter... I mean you and Robin," John blustered.
"How do you mean?"
"I mean we, er, we haven't...we don't...we're not..."
"You haven't slept with him?"
"No! God, no! We, er, we...just...umm..."
"I see." Much nodded slowly as he sat down beside John on the bench.
John stared at the ground. Could my face get any hotter? He nodded. "It was just...nice...having someone else there. That's all."
Much remained uncharacteristically silent.
"We were just...helping each other out," John added.
"That sounds perfectly reasonable," Much agreed. "But you're with the queen now, so you don't need Legrand any more."
"No." That's right. I don't need him for that... So why do I miss it?
"And I'm sure Legrand will be able to find somebody else to be close to. He's a handsome man - with a good position."
Yeah, right behind Carter, thought John with a scowl. Wait...am I.. am I jealous? Of that? No. Never. He turned and looked at Much and was surprised to see how sad his friend looked. I don't think you're thinking of me and Legrand, are you? "I'm sure Carter will be fine too." More than, based on what I saw.
"Oh I'm sure he will," Much said. "It's hard to let go of something you've gotten used to, is all."
"Yes..." John said uncertainly. It's not the routine I miss... It wasn't ... It's... It's him.
"John?"
It's him. "I miss him."
"What?"
"I miss him," John sighed. "He was good company. We got on well together." John was silent for a moment and then plucked up his courage to ask, "Much, when... When did you know? That you felt that way about another man?"
Much's eyes widened a little in obvious surprise at the blunt question but then he smiled at the memory. "About a year after I became Robin's manservant. I found myself thinking about him the same way I'd thought about some of the serving girls, just wondering what it would be like."
"And it didn't bother you?"
"Of course it did. I had to accompany Robin to Mass every week. I knew it was blasphemous but still..." Much paused, then looked again at John. "John, you know the difference between right and wrong, perhaps more than anyone I know. Does it feel wrong? Are you hurting anyone else by what you feel for Legrand?"
John gave that a long moment's thought. "No." Just myself.
Much sighed. He stood in front of John then, to John's great surprise, swung his leg forward over the bench, swung his other leg forward to the other side of John and sat down in John's lap, facing him.
"Much - what're you doing?" he asked.
Much gently took John's face in his hands, then leaned over and kissed him passionately. John was so stunned he didn't even move.
"There. Anything?" Much asked.
"Wh-what?"
"Did you feel anything?" Much asked again. "Are you now seized by an uncontrollable lust for me?"
"Umm, no."
"No, because I'm not Legrand. And while that wasn't entirely unpleasant, it didn't really do anything for me either."
"We've already established that you don't fancy me." John smiled.
"Yes, but I don't fancy you because you're not Carter."
John just caught himself from saying, You mean Robin. It really wasn't the right moment for a correction.
"You like Legrand - not because he's a man but because he's him, because he likes you."
"He's got a bloody funny way of showing it recently."
"Doesn't make it any less true though... John?"
"Yes, Much?"
Much leaned in and kissed him again. "Just checking..." Much winked at him. "Nope - still don't."
John laughed then stood up swiftly and crushed Much to his chest in a massive hug.
"I might not fancy you, Much, but I do love you. Thank you." He planted a large sloppy kiss on Much's forehead.
"Can't...breathe..."
John relaxed his grip, dropping Much to the ground.
Much hugged him back. "I have to go find Robin. Are you alright?"
"I will be. Thanks, Much." John took his seat again as Much headed back inside. He leaned back and looked up at the stars through the trees, remembering another starry night in Acre.
Great...so now I'm happier about having these feelings for Legrand - just as he stops talking to me and hitches up with Carter. And I've just started a relationship with the most powerful woman in the world... You are the biggest idiot in Christendom, John Little...
>>-------------------->
Eleanor watched John sit for a few minutes, giving him plenty of time to assume she had only just arrived. She stepped from her concealment and walked towards him, her shoes making only the slightest noise on the gravel path. He looked up then quickly sank to one knee as he recognised her.
"Your Majesty."
"John. Is Carter back yet? Did you deliver my message to him?"
"Yes, Your Majesty."
"Thank you. Please - retake your seat." She sat beside him. "The gardens have a completely different kind of beauty in the moonlight, don't they?"
"Yes, they're lovely."
"You look so sad, John - is anything wrong?"
"What could possibly be wrong, Your Majesty?" He smiled at her. "I'm in a beautiful garden with a beautiful woman and we're all alone."
She winked. "A beautiful woman who knows all the best hiding places."
He chuckled softly. "I have never met a woman so... forthright in her desires."
"Have you had many lovers, John?"
"I, err, no, not many - only three or four."
"Three or four? You're not sure?" she teased him.
"Three."
"So number four was not a lover after all then. Poor soul...or was it unrequited on your part?"
"No, no - it was hi... it was just a friendship that went a bit further."
Eleanor noticed his near-slip. Interesting. "Ah. Sometimes those can be the most rewarding relationships of all - where love has time to grow slowly from small seeds."
John smiled and his eyes were suddenly looking at something much further away. "I knew Alice for months before I even spoke to her."
"Alice?"
John swallowed nervously. "Number three. My...my wife." He held his breath waiting for her reaction but since the fact of his marriage was not news to her Eleanor decided to put him from his misery.
"I did hear you had a wife...and a son."
"Yes. I...I should have said earlier."
"Why? It is my understanding that since you are outlawed, she is considered a widow and you are both free to pursue other relationships."
"Yes, but knowing that and... feeling it are two different things. She put me behind her long ago when she thought I was dead but I suppose I always harboured some stupid dream of returning to her. I know now that won't happen. She's happy and she's with a good man who can look after her. I hated the idea it wasn't me at first, but now I'm just glad for her."
"And your son?"
"He's better where he is too - and besides, we barely know each other. Maybe one day I'll meet him again but for now I just want to make sure he has nothing to be ashamed of when he thinks of me."
"I'm sure he must be very proud of you." Eleanor stood up and took his arm. "Now, you young rascal. I think it's definitely past your bedtime."
John grinned as he quickly got to his feet beside her. "Going to tuck me in with a hot drink?"
"I had...something else in mind."
Author: wastingyourgum
Characters/Pairings: Little John, Much, Eleanor
Rating: PG
Genre: Gen with the teeniest hint of slash and het
Words: 1450
Disclaimer: BBC & TA own; we just want to play in their universe
Notes: Beta'd by jagnikjen & robinfanatic; takes place after AU 2x13 but prior to 3x01
Introduction and chapter links for Denial II are here...
Summary: John tries to come to terms with what he's just witnessed in Carter's room - with a little help from Much...
>>>---------------->>
Chapter 31: The Garden of Earthly Delights
by wastingyourgum
John walked to a quiet spot in the garden and sat on a stone bench under a tree, placing his head in his hands.
So Legrand and Carter had...had... Who cared? He certainly didn't. Why should he? He was the queen's lover and besides, men shouldn't... do that with other men. It wasn't right.
His memory flashed back to that brief glimpse of long legs, smooth bodies, tight muscles.
God, he looked good naked...and no need to wonder what Much ever saw in Carter either.
John shook his head.
Do not do this. Don't think about it. Don't think about him. It's wrong!
"It's Legrand, isn't it?"
"What?" John looked up, startled. Much was standing in front of him.
"You're upset he's not talking to you any more."
"Yes...." Amongst other things.
"And you are more than just friends, aren't you?" Much sounded almost scolding in his tone.
John realised Much probably knew full well what was going on and had for some time. It must have hurt him that John had kept on denying it. He took a deep breath then replied in a low voice, "Yes."
He flinched in surprise as Much hugged him tightly. "Thank you for telling me, John."
"It's not like you and Carter... I mean you and Robin," John blustered.
"How do you mean?"
"I mean we, er, we haven't...we don't...we're not..."
"You haven't slept with him?"
"No! God, no! We, er, we...just...umm..."
"I see." Much nodded slowly as he sat down beside John on the bench.
John stared at the ground. Could my face get any hotter? He nodded. "It was just...nice...having someone else there. That's all."
Much remained uncharacteristically silent.
"We were just...helping each other out," John added.
"That sounds perfectly reasonable," Much agreed. "But you're with the queen now, so you don't need Legrand any more."
"No." That's right. I don't need him for that... So why do I miss it?
"And I'm sure Legrand will be able to find somebody else to be close to. He's a handsome man - with a good position."
Yeah, right behind Carter, thought John with a scowl. Wait...am I.. am I jealous? Of that? No. Never. He turned and looked at Much and was surprised to see how sad his friend looked. I don't think you're thinking of me and Legrand, are you? "I'm sure Carter will be fine too." More than, based on what I saw.
"Oh I'm sure he will," Much said. "It's hard to let go of something you've gotten used to, is all."
"Yes..." John said uncertainly. It's not the routine I miss... It wasn't ... It's... It's him.
"John?"
It's him. "I miss him."
"What?"
"I miss him," John sighed. "He was good company. We got on well together." John was silent for a moment and then plucked up his courage to ask, "Much, when... When did you know? That you felt that way about another man?"
Much's eyes widened a little in obvious surprise at the blunt question but then he smiled at the memory. "About a year after I became Robin's manservant. I found myself thinking about him the same way I'd thought about some of the serving girls, just wondering what it would be like."
"And it didn't bother you?"
"Of course it did. I had to accompany Robin to Mass every week. I knew it was blasphemous but still..." Much paused, then looked again at John. "John, you know the difference between right and wrong, perhaps more than anyone I know. Does it feel wrong? Are you hurting anyone else by what you feel for Legrand?"
John gave that a long moment's thought. "No." Just myself.
Much sighed. He stood in front of John then, to John's great surprise, swung his leg forward over the bench, swung his other leg forward to the other side of John and sat down in John's lap, facing him.
"Much - what're you doing?" he asked.
Much gently took John's face in his hands, then leaned over and kissed him passionately. John was so stunned he didn't even move.
"There. Anything?" Much asked.
"Wh-what?"
"Did you feel anything?" Much asked again. "Are you now seized by an uncontrollable lust for me?"
"Umm, no."
"No, because I'm not Legrand. And while that wasn't entirely unpleasant, it didn't really do anything for me either."
"We've already established that you don't fancy me." John smiled.
"Yes, but I don't fancy you because you're not Carter."
John just caught himself from saying, You mean Robin. It really wasn't the right moment for a correction.
"You like Legrand - not because he's a man but because he's him, because he likes you."
"He's got a bloody funny way of showing it recently."
"Doesn't make it any less true though... John?"
"Yes, Much?"
Much leaned in and kissed him again. "Just checking..." Much winked at him. "Nope - still don't."
John laughed then stood up swiftly and crushed Much to his chest in a massive hug.
"I might not fancy you, Much, but I do love you. Thank you." He planted a large sloppy kiss on Much's forehead.
"Can't...breathe..."
John relaxed his grip, dropping Much to the ground.
Much hugged him back. "I have to go find Robin. Are you alright?"
"I will be. Thanks, Much." John took his seat again as Much headed back inside. He leaned back and looked up at the stars through the trees, remembering another starry night in Acre.
Great...so now I'm happier about having these feelings for Legrand - just as he stops talking to me and hitches up with Carter. And I've just started a relationship with the most powerful woman in the world... You are the biggest idiot in Christendom, John Little...
>>-------------------->
Eleanor watched John sit for a few minutes, giving him plenty of time to assume she had only just arrived. She stepped from her concealment and walked towards him, her shoes making only the slightest noise on the gravel path. He looked up then quickly sank to one knee as he recognised her.
"Your Majesty."
"John. Is Carter back yet? Did you deliver my message to him?"
"Yes, Your Majesty."
"Thank you. Please - retake your seat." She sat beside him. "The gardens have a completely different kind of beauty in the moonlight, don't they?"
"Yes, they're lovely."
"You look so sad, John - is anything wrong?"
"What could possibly be wrong, Your Majesty?" He smiled at her. "I'm in a beautiful garden with a beautiful woman and we're all alone."
She winked. "A beautiful woman who knows all the best hiding places."
He chuckled softly. "I have never met a woman so... forthright in her desires."
"Have you had many lovers, John?"
"I, err, no, not many - only three or four."
"Three or four? You're not sure?" she teased him.
"Three."
"So number four was not a lover after all then. Poor soul...or was it unrequited on your part?"
"No, no - it was hi... it was just a friendship that went a bit further."
Eleanor noticed his near-slip. Interesting. "Ah. Sometimes those can be the most rewarding relationships of all - where love has time to grow slowly from small seeds."
John smiled and his eyes were suddenly looking at something much further away. "I knew Alice for months before I even spoke to her."
"Alice?"
John swallowed nervously. "Number three. My...my wife." He held his breath waiting for her reaction but since the fact of his marriage was not news to her Eleanor decided to put him from his misery.
"I did hear you had a wife...and a son."
"Yes. I...I should have said earlier."
"Why? It is my understanding that since you are outlawed, she is considered a widow and you are both free to pursue other relationships."
"Yes, but knowing that and... feeling it are two different things. She put me behind her long ago when she thought I was dead but I suppose I always harboured some stupid dream of returning to her. I know now that won't happen. She's happy and she's with a good man who can look after her. I hated the idea it wasn't me at first, but now I'm just glad for her."
"And your son?"
"He's better where he is too - and besides, we barely know each other. Maybe one day I'll meet him again but for now I just want to make sure he has nothing to be ashamed of when he thinks of me."
"I'm sure he must be very proud of you." Eleanor stood up and took his arm. "Now, you young rascal. I think it's definitely past your bedtime."
John grinned as he quickly got to his feet beside her. "Going to tuck me in with a hot drink?"
"I had...something else in mind."