APH KINK MEME FILLS PART 3
YARR, THERE BE VAGUE FAIL SEX- I mean, GERITA KINK DRABBLE
It... It was so hot...
The messy deep kisses, the tantalizingly slow yet rough grinding of hips, the heat between the two was almost dizzying. The fact that the two were still fully clothed didn't help with the heat at all.
Italy let out a soft whine and his trembling hands slowly inched toward the hem of his shirt. He had to take something off before he went mad. He want- no, he needed to get rid of the maddening itch his clothes were starting to cause as his skin burned, eager for freedom. Before he could grip the hem of his shirt, Germany paused and his left arm shot out to grip the other's wrist and firmly held it above the Italian's head.
Italy let out a frustrated whine and weakly tried to struggle against Germany's hold. "Ngh, but G-Germany..."
"Don't."
Italy shivered at the other's husky tone and fervid gaze. He's never seen him like this before... He let out another strangled cry when Germany's arm, the one that was still holding his wrist, accidentally rubbed against his curl when he resumed deliciously grinding their hips.
Maybe he wouldn't mind not feeling skin on skin just this once...
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
THIS IS SO LAME AND SHORT, IT DESERVES NO TITLE
Where could Prussia... No, Gilbert be? Ludiwg cursed to himself as he continued his fruitless search for his brother in the streets of Germany.
Damn the dissolution. Damn it all.
He glanced at his watch and let out a deep sigh. He's been searching for almost 10 hours and it was starting to get dark... He couldn't search all day, so he let out a frustrated sigh and started walking back home.
He trudged into the house, into the living room, fatigue finally catching up to him and depression dragging him down. Before he sat down, he noticed a messily folded up piece of paper taped above the fireplace. He went over, grabbed it and unfolded it to see his brother's messy scrawl.
'Hey West,
This dissolution thing sure sucks, huh? Seriously, I'm supposed to be too damn awesome for this to happen, heh."
Ludwig sighed. How could he take this so lightly?
'You better not overact ments or I'll find a way to kick your amarillo James!'
... What? Did he just read that incorrectly? He must be tired. His brother was an idiot, but surely not retarded.
'Same goes for Francis and Antonio, so tell 'em that for me. Oh yeah, tell that aristocrat bastard that scene impale buffers from gluten airplane.
Hey, that steering haggart deserves it! Said aramco sought moddying liveable dur-'
The rest of the letter was just a bunch of random words stringed together. Ludwig furrowed his brow. Maybe there was a purpose? A hidden message?
...
After trying to 'decode' the message for several hours while reading about 'flying Canada' and 'exploding starch', he grit his teeth and his hand holding the letter shook violently, trying to resist crumpling it.
Damn him.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
WHAT THE HELL AM I WATCHING?
http://hetalia-kink.livejournal.com/13125.html?thread=32825413#t32825413
"Get off your laptop and get ready!"
"But we have 2 hours until we have to go!"
"Shut up! You're still haven't changed! Most of the junk that was in your bag is scattered around the damn floor!"
"But I know where my clothes is, so I can just grab it and go! Jeeze, you're real annoying, old man!"
"Why you-"
Canada sighed as he watched his brother and England fight yet again from the bed. He knew it would've been a bad idea for the two of them to stay in the same hotel room. Especially during the Olympics since the competitive nations tended to become rather irritating (America) or irritable (England). Even some nations that were considered to be more docile could get rowdy and aggressive during the Olympics.
Canada smiled to himself. At least having the Olympics in Vancouver finally made people notice him, even if only for 2 weeks. He hadn't been sat on, missed or mistaken for America since the games began. Even Kumarojo has been recognizing him more than usual.
"AHA," America suddenly blurted out, completely ignoring England's ranting and making Canada flinch. "I've got mail! Shut up for a minute, England, I gotta check it!"
England scowled. "I'm not finished speaking, damn it! Pay attention-"
"Hey, someone sent me a link last night!" America paused when he looked at the sender's address. "Huh? Who the heck is this?"
England frowned and looked over America's shoulder at the screen. "I don't recognize it either-"
"Wow! I thought old farts don't check email!"
England continued after smacking America on the back of the head. "As I was saying, I don't know who's address that is either. I don't think you should open it."
"Hey, there's a link! Oh, it's a video!"
"WHY DON'T YOU EVER LISTEN TO ME!?"
"Oh, it's a French Orangina commercial!" America motioned over Canada as the video began to load. "Hey, come on Canada! Someone sent me a video!"
"If this video is related to that frog bastard, it's probably a waste of time."
Canada shook his head. "No, it's okay. I'll pass."
America shrugged and pressed the play button. "Suit yourself."
"Boo, this is boring. Just some chick on a swing and a bear."
"That bastard's work is boring most of the time. I'm not surprised."
"It's a deer? With boobs? Oh! Maybe the bear is going to eat her!"
"Okay, what the hell does this have to do with jui- Isthatdeerstraddlingthatbear?"
"Woah, this is getting a bit weird... France sure has weird commercials- IS THAT A POLEDANCER!?"
"And why the fuck is there an octopus- those peacocks-... W-what!?"
"Why would somebody send me this!? HEROS DON'T WATCH THINGS LIKE THIS!"
"WHAT THE HELL AM I WATCHING!?"
"I... I don't know! I... I... I'm never drinking Orangina ever again! That's all I know!"
"What the fuck was he thinking of when he made this!?"
"I DON'T WANT TO KNOW."
And after 1 minute and 45 seconds of WTF, jawdrops and screaming, the video ended.
America suddenly got up from his seat, his expression and tone blank. "I think I need some time by myself." He quickly dashed into the bathroom and shut and locked the door.
England stood, frozen, for a whole minute with only an occasional eye twitch. Canada became more worried with each passing second. Could that video have put him into a state of shock? What if it caused him to be completely out of it for the entire day? Should he get some water to splash him with?
Luckily, England suddenly snapped out of it. "FRAAAAAAAAAAAAANCE!"
... Okay, maybe that was a bad thing. Especially since England just got out his magic wand, which started to glow with a bloodred aura.
Canada flinched. He hoped they wouldn't be reported to the front desk as England stormed out of the room while swearing loudly, with his wand letting off crackles and sparks.
Canada sighed, got up and went over to close his brother's laptop.
He looked back at the bathroom door and smirked when he heard sobbing.
When he told his brother last night before the match that he took hockey seriously, he meant it. This wouldn't have happened if his brother hadn't kept rubbing the loss in his face.
His smirk faltered when he heard muffled yelling and crashes come from a room on the floor above their own room.
... But he should apologize to France some time tonight.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
S.A.D.
So America, Spain, Prussia, Germany, Denmark and Sweden walk into a bar and... I have no punchline. *is shot*
"Ah! I didn't see you there for a second!"
Prussia peered over the backs of the nations between him and America to see who he was talking to.
... He was talking to an empty seat to his right. How the hell could that bastard he be that drunk already? They've only been here for 30 minutes!
"Ehehe, sorry Mattie!"
'Mattie? Who the hell is that?'
"Man, you're so quiet! You'd probably make an awesome ninja!"
America burst out laughing while patting the 'suspicious empty space' above the unoccupied seat. England, who was to America's left, scowled, slammed his glass onto the counter and jabbed his shoulder.
...
"Eh? Why are you here Spain? I thought you'd be with Italy's crazy brother today," America said with a loud, blunt tone that made the other nations cringe.
Spain, however, was unaffected and cheerfully responded. "Huh? Should I have brought Romano along?"
"What? You can't bring him along," Prussia huffed.
"But Romano is cute and-"
"Do you even know why we came here?"
"Well, you said something about something and invited me to drink and I said why not!"
Prussia was torn between ripping his hair out in frustration, or ripping out the Spaniard's hair instead.
Germany sighed and firmly held his brother back before he did something to get them banned from yet another bar. "My brother dragged us all here for S.A.D."
Spain frowned. "We're celebrating Sad Day?"
"No you idiot," England snapped. "S. A. D. Not Sad, damn it!"
His frown deepened for a few seconds but then returned to his usual bright grin. He went right up to England, spread his arms . "Looks like the salty, British bastard needs my special cheer up charm on Sad Day! Fu so so-"
"I DON'T WANT YOUR DAMN CHEER UP CHARM," England screeched as he shoved back the other.
Prussia broke free from Germany's grasp and went over to grab Spain away from England and shook him by his shoulders. "S.A.D! SINGLES APPRECIATION DAY."
...
"You didn't call me or anything! How the bloody hell was I supposed to know that-"
"Honestly, I thought we've been together for months! Mon deiu! Can't I try to let you initiate a simple date without having you assume the worst?"
England just glared in response and then turned his back to him
...
Prussia sighed and placed down his beer. There goes another pretty damn awesome S.A.D. drinking buddy. He looked at his younger brother and grinned. Well, at lest West was still there. They've had tons of awesome drinking days together! Plus, it's not like cute lil' Italy is going to come in here by himself and-
"Veeeeee!"
Germany turned towards the entrance, brow raised. "Brother, did you hear-"
Prussia grabbed the other's head and forcefully turned his gaze away from the door. "'s probably nothin'," he murmured. "Prob'ly just a siren or-"
"Veeeee! Geeeeeermany!!"
Prussia groaned and his palm had a nice meeting with his forehead. "Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me," he growled under his breath.
Sure, he thought the kid was cute, but it always irritated him when he clung to West. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
PINK... TOMATO?
Prussia, France, and Spain using lame pick up lines on random people in a big store for laughs. Bonus if they accidentally use one on a nation or two that they weren't expecting to see there.
France and Spain of the Bad Touch Friends Trio were currently hiding out in the most unused part in the large store, snickering, after a few successful and unsuccessful pranks.
(Of course they weren't giggling because 'Team Badtouch Tomato Awesome is too MANLY for that.)
"Mon deui, did you see how fast Gilbert ran," Francis exclaimed, ending with a hearty laugh. "I told him to check before he opened his mouth."
Antonio giggled snickered and peered over the corner of the section they were hiding in to see if Ivan was still around. "I've never seen anyone run that fast! I think he could've broken Lovi's record in fastest retreat!"
"If only I had recorded that," Francis tutted while fiddling with his cellphone. "I was busy laughing..."
"It was almost as funny as the time you tried!"
Francis shuddered. "Those young ladies were far too paranoid..." He gingerly touched a lock of his singed hair on the back of his head and cringed.
"I didn't even know that pepper spray was flammable!"
"Well, mon ami, now you know and we should take that into account... I knew I was going to get slapped or kicked around a few times, but getting my hair burnt off is not on that list."
Antonio checked outside of the aisle for Ivan again. "Sooo, should we wait for Gilbert to come back?"
Francis tried to call Gilbert's cell, but he wasn't picking up. "Non. I don't think he's coming back... Should we go out and find him?"
"It's my turn again, right? One last pick up line and we'll go," Antonio said while searching through the crowd for a target, bubbling with excitement.
"Up to you, mon ami. Please don't get distracted and try not to take an hour like last time-"
"Oh! The tomatoes are on sale!? Be right back!"
Antonio dashed off, completely forgetting what he was planning to do prior.
Francis sighed and leaned against the aisle.
"I'll give him 10 minutes..."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Antonio was a little disappointed when he noticed the tomatoes in the store were much smaller than the ones he grew. But a tomato is a tomato, so he picked up a nearby, empty shopping basket and began to toss several in.
"Let's see~ One for me, one for Romano, one for Feliciano, one for me, maybe three more for Romano since he loves them so much and another five for me-"
He saw a short-haired blonde in the cutest pink and white dress walk by and he snapped out of his tomato heaven stupor. He suddenly remembered the prank he was supposed to do and grinned.
It was perfect. She wasn't carrying anything, not even a purse, and she was alone. Plus the vegetable and fruit aisle didn't have any people besides Antonio and the blonde because the produce was pretty lacking.
Francis, who was spying on Antonio from a distance, saw the perfect opportunity as well.
"There is absolutely no way he can mess this up. All he has to do is calmly walk up to her, say -one- line in an attractive way and then walk away nonchalantly," he mumbled to himself.
He facepalmed when Antonio practically skipped over to the target and, with a bright smile, greeted her. If the blonde didn't oppose Antonio before he went into his tomato and Romano chatter, they would be there for hours, to Francis' despair.
Well, it was Antonio. The day Antonio decides to be sexy, smooth and to the point during one of their hijinks would be the day he stopped drinking wine and switched to drinking Arthur's gin.
As much as Francis didn't want to wish bad fortune onto his friend, he wanted the target to walk away or stop Antonio from blabbering.
The blonde turned her head to look at Antonio with a somewhat confused look on her face.
When she turned, Francis was able to see her face more clearly.
'Wait, she looks like...'
Antonio's smile grew when he saw her face.
"Hey there! You're much cuter close up! Even if tomatoes normally aren't pink, you could be my special toma-"
"Oh, like, you're that tomato dude that hangs out with Italy's, like, totally crazy brother!"
Antonio froze in mid sentence.
'That voice, why is it low!? And that accent a-and actually that hair and face looks familiar and... and...'
"F-Feliks?"
Feliks huffed. "Like, duh. By the way, what was with that tomato stuff you were talking about anyway?"
"Uh, well-"
"But, like, I totally hate tomatoes though. They're like, totally gross and kinda, like, weird."
"Huh!? But-"
Feliks continued to ignore Antonio as he blabbered on. "Well, I already forget why I came here in the first place! Anyway, Toris was yelling at me early about my dress, which is totally awesome and the best, and he's probably just, like, jealous. Also-"
"I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO CHANGE!"
Toris rushed towards Feliks, past Antonio, who was still a bit shocked about the fact that he mistook Feliks for a girl and the fact that there was someone that hated tomatoes. It looked like Toris had been running around a lot before, for he was panting for breath and looked like he was about to collapse.
Feliks pouted and crossed his arms. "Heeey, where have you been, Toris? You, like, totally ditched me earlier. So uncool."
"But you were the one that just left me before I could find better clothes for you," Toris groaned.
"This dress is totally better though."
"L-Look, let's just go back home," Toris sighed. "Ah, I'm sorry Antonio, I hope he didn't cause you any trouble?"
"No... It's fine."
"Aw, you're so not fun Toris."
Toris blushed as he dragged Feliks out of the aisle.
Francis sighed and walked over to Antonio, who had just mentally gotten over the fact that he mistook Feliks for a girl, but was still have trouble getting over the thought that someone found tomatoes disgusting.
"People have different tastes. It can't be helped."
"But tomatoes are the best..."
"As I said before, you can't do anything about that I'm afraid."
"But everybody I know loves tomatoes!"
"... Let's just go find Gilbert."
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
ALFRED/SODA STAIN, WHAT THE HELL, SELF?
Alfred, never one to wait for an invitation or permission, burst into Arthur's room with a half-filled cup of soda in one hand and a folder with pictures in the other.
He bounded to the middle of the room and posed in a comical and dramatic fashion, laughing boisterously.
"Ha ha ha! How was that entrance, Arthur? Pretty awesome-... huh?"
There was his bed, wardrobe, small and simple black couch, small book case and a very simple desk, but no Arthur... Alfred had peeked every room in his house, eager to boast about the new plane design he came up with last week, but Arthur was no where to be found. He was sure that Arthur would've been in his room if not in the kitchen, bathroom, dining room, living room, ect ect ect...
He should've suspected that Arthur wasn't home in the first place considering Alfred had to search through several potted plants outside in order to find the hidden spare house key. Hopefully Arthur won't notice a few 5 broken flower pots...
Alfred grumbled, tossed his folder onto the desk and plopped down onto the small couch and carefully put his soda cup down beside him.
"Well fine. I'll just wait for him to come back then!"
Alfred grinned. "I can't wait to see his face when he sees how awesome my designs art!"
He pumped his fist with gusto and stuck another pose, laughing, but because of that action, he tipped over his cup.
Alfred cursed and jolted off of the couch to avoid getting spilled on and by the time he grabbed the cup off the couch, all of its contents were now soaked onto the couch's soft surface.
"Aw man..." Alfred sighed and placed the cup on the floor a few feet away so that he wouldn't tip it over again. He came back closer to the couch and began to poke the hand-sized soda stain on the seat cushion.
He pouted. "What a waste of soda... It was my favorite kind too..."
Wait, I need to think of a way to hide this before Arthur comes back! I won't even get a chance to show off if he gets angry about this!
He looked around the room for anything he could use. Maybe he could put a pillow from the bed or a book from the bookcase on the stain and hope Arthur didn't pick it up by the time it dried? Then again, he didn't know when Arthur would be coming back... He doubted that Arthur had a blowdryer he could use... Maybe he could...
Alfred let out an aggravated sigh. "Geh, all of this worrying is making me thirsty!"
Unfortunately, he didn't bring anything else to drink. He doubted that there was anything to drink that he'd like in this house, he hated his tea since it wasn't sweet enough, and he couldn't go out to buy something since he didn't want Arthur to come back before he returned.
Alfred groaned and plopped back onto the couch. He absentmindedly looked around the room while trying to think of what to do quench his thirst and to hide the stain.
~~~SKDJFHKSLDFHLKSDJFH~~~
Just one lick...
He slowly lowered his head towards the stain.
I'm just licking a soda stain on a couch once! No harm in that, right?
With his face now only an inch above from his destination, he stuck out his tongue and slowly ran it across the damp, soft couch material. The faint taste of his soda was definitely there; sugary and sweet.
~~~JESUS CRUST WITH BUTTER D:~~~~
The couch... smells like him...
Alfred inhaled deeply and continued to grind his waist against the front of the couch.
"Hah... Arthur... Ngh..."
His smell, that taste, so soft, too hot... Such simple things blinded him as they flooded his senses.
"Wrong... This is so wrong, but I n-need... Hah..."
~~~~BAAAAA~~~~
"Oi, Alfred, you bastard! Would it kill you to not break into my bloody house uninvited- WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO MY COUCH?!"
Alfred immediately stopped dry humping the poor, abused couch and turned to face Arthur, eyes still slightly glazed with arousal.
The two just stared at each other for a few seconds. One with a horrified, shocked expression and the other was at a complete loss of words.
"Arthur! Y-you're finally back!"
"GET-"
"IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE. I SWEAR, I... TRIPPED!"
"LIKE HELL YOU DID. GET OUT NOW!"
It... It was so hot...
The messy deep kisses, the tantalizingly slow yet rough grinding of hips, the heat between the two was almost dizzying. The fact that the two were still fully clothed didn't help with the heat at all.
Italy let out a soft whine and his trembling hands slowly inched toward the hem of his shirt. He had to take something off before he went mad. He want- no, he needed to get rid of the maddening itch his clothes were starting to cause as his skin burned, eager for freedom. Before he could grip the hem of his shirt, Germany paused and his left arm shot out to grip the other's wrist and firmly held it above the Italian's head.
Italy let out a frustrated whine and weakly tried to struggle against Germany's hold. "Ngh, but G-Germany..."
"Don't."
Italy shivered at the other's husky tone and fervid gaze. He's never seen him like this before... He let out another strangled cry when Germany's arm, the one that was still holding his wrist, accidentally rubbed against his curl when he resumed deliciously grinding their hips.
Maybe he wouldn't mind not feeling skin on skin just this once...
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
THIS IS SO LAME AND SHORT, IT DESERVES NO TITLE
Where could Prussia... No, Gilbert be? Ludiwg cursed to himself as he continued his fruitless search for his brother in the streets of Germany.
Damn the dissolution. Damn it all.
He glanced at his watch and let out a deep sigh. He's been searching for almost 10 hours and it was starting to get dark... He couldn't search all day, so he let out a frustrated sigh and started walking back home.
He trudged into the house, into the living room, fatigue finally catching up to him and depression dragging him down. Before he sat down, he noticed a messily folded up piece of paper taped above the fireplace. He went over, grabbed it and unfolded it to see his brother's messy scrawl.
'Hey West,
This dissolution thing sure sucks, huh? Seriously, I'm supposed to be too damn awesome for this to happen, heh."
Ludwig sighed. How could he take this so lightly?
'You better not overact ments or I'll find a way to kick your amarillo James!'
... What? Did he just read that incorrectly? He must be tired. His brother was an idiot, but surely not retarded.
'Same goes for Francis and Antonio, so tell 'em that for me. Oh yeah, tell that aristocrat bastard that scene impale buffers from gluten airplane.
Hey, that steering haggart deserves it! Said aramco sought moddying liveable dur-'
The rest of the letter was just a bunch of random words stringed together. Ludwig furrowed his brow. Maybe there was a purpose? A hidden message?
...
After trying to 'decode' the message for several hours while reading about 'flying Canada' and 'exploding starch', he grit his teeth and his hand holding the letter shook violently, trying to resist crumpling it.
Damn him.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
WHAT THE HELL AM I WATCHING?
http://hetalia-kink.livejournal.com/13125.html?thread=32825413#t32825413
"Get off your laptop and get ready!"
"But we have 2 hours until we have to go!"
"Shut up! You're still haven't changed! Most of the junk that was in your bag is scattered around the damn floor!"
"But I know where my clothes is, so I can just grab it and go! Jeeze, you're real annoying, old man!"
"Why you-"
Canada sighed as he watched his brother and England fight yet again from the bed. He knew it would've been a bad idea for the two of them to stay in the same hotel room. Especially during the Olympics since the competitive nations tended to become rather irritating (America) or irritable (England). Even some nations that were considered to be more docile could get rowdy and aggressive during the Olympics.
Canada smiled to himself. At least having the Olympics in Vancouver finally made people notice him, even if only for 2 weeks. He hadn't been sat on, missed or mistaken for America since the games began. Even Kumarojo has been recognizing him more than usual.
"AHA," America suddenly blurted out, completely ignoring England's ranting and making Canada flinch. "I've got mail! Shut up for a minute, England, I gotta check it!"
England scowled. "I'm not finished speaking, damn it! Pay attention-"
"Hey, someone sent me a link last night!" America paused when he looked at the sender's address. "Huh? Who the heck is this?"
England frowned and looked over America's shoulder at the screen. "I don't recognize it either-"
"Wow! I thought old farts don't check email!"
England continued after smacking America on the back of the head. "As I was saying, I don't know who's address that is either. I don't think you should open it."
"Hey, there's a link! Oh, it's a video!"
"WHY DON'T YOU EVER LISTEN TO ME!?"
"Oh, it's a French Orangina commercial!" America motioned over Canada as the video began to load. "Hey, come on Canada! Someone sent me a video!"
"If this video is related to that frog bastard, it's probably a waste of time."
Canada shook his head. "No, it's okay. I'll pass."
America shrugged and pressed the play button. "Suit yourself."
"Boo, this is boring. Just some chick on a swing and a bear."
"That bastard's work is boring most of the time. I'm not surprised."
"It's a deer? With boobs? Oh! Maybe the bear is going to eat her!"
"Okay, what the hell does this have to do with jui- Isthatdeerstraddlingthatbear?"
"Woah, this is getting a bit weird... France sure has weird commercials- IS THAT A POLEDANCER!?"
"And why the fuck is there an octopus- those peacocks-... W-what!?"
"Why would somebody send me this!? HEROS DON'T WATCH THINGS LIKE THIS!"
"WHAT THE HELL AM I WATCHING!?"
"I... I don't know! I... I... I'm never drinking Orangina ever again! That's all I know!"
"What the fuck was he thinking of when he made this!?"
"I DON'T WANT TO KNOW."
And after 1 minute and 45 seconds of WTF, jawdrops and screaming, the video ended.
America suddenly got up from his seat, his expression and tone blank. "I think I need some time by myself." He quickly dashed into the bathroom and shut and locked the door.
England stood, frozen, for a whole minute with only an occasional eye twitch. Canada became more worried with each passing second. Could that video have put him into a state of shock? What if it caused him to be completely out of it for the entire day? Should he get some water to splash him with?
Luckily, England suddenly snapped out of it. "FRAAAAAAAAAAAAANCE!"
... Okay, maybe that was a bad thing. Especially since England just got out his magic wand, which started to glow with a bloodred aura.
Canada flinched. He hoped they wouldn't be reported to the front desk as England stormed out of the room while swearing loudly, with his wand letting off crackles and sparks.
Canada sighed, got up and went over to close his brother's laptop.
He looked back at the bathroom door and smirked when he heard sobbing.
When he told his brother last night before the match that he took hockey seriously, he meant it. This wouldn't have happened if his brother hadn't kept rubbing the loss in his face.
His smirk faltered when he heard muffled yelling and crashes come from a room on the floor above their own room.
... But he should apologize to France some time tonight.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
S.A.D.
So America, Spain, Prussia, Germany, Denmark and Sweden walk into a bar and... I have no punchline. *is shot*
"Ah! I didn't see you there for a second!"
Prussia peered over the backs of the nations between him and America to see who he was talking to.
... He was talking to an empty seat to his right. How the hell could that bastard he be that drunk already? They've only been here for 30 minutes!
"Ehehe, sorry Mattie!"
'Mattie? Who the hell is that?'
"Man, you're so quiet! You'd probably make an awesome ninja!"
America burst out laughing while patting the 'suspicious empty space' above the unoccupied seat. England, who was to America's left, scowled, slammed his glass onto the counter and jabbed his shoulder.
...
"Eh? Why are you here Spain? I thought you'd be with Italy's crazy brother today," America said with a loud, blunt tone that made the other nations cringe.
Spain, however, was unaffected and cheerfully responded. "Huh? Should I have brought Romano along?"
"What? You can't bring him along," Prussia huffed.
"But Romano is cute and-"
"Do you even know why we came here?"
"Well, you said something about something and invited me to drink and I said why not!"
Prussia was torn between ripping his hair out in frustration, or ripping out the Spaniard's hair instead.
Germany sighed and firmly held his brother back before he did something to get them banned from yet another bar. "My brother dragged us all here for S.A.D."
Spain frowned. "We're celebrating Sad Day?"
"No you idiot," England snapped. "S. A. D. Not Sad, damn it!"
His frown deepened for a few seconds but then returned to his usual bright grin. He went right up to England, spread his arms . "Looks like the salty, British bastard needs my special cheer up charm on Sad Day! Fu so so-"
"I DON'T WANT YOUR DAMN CHEER UP CHARM," England screeched as he shoved back the other.
Prussia broke free from Germany's grasp and went over to grab Spain away from England and shook him by his shoulders. "S.A.D! SINGLES APPRECIATION DAY."
...
"You didn't call me or anything! How the bloody hell was I supposed to know that-"
"Honestly, I thought we've been together for months! Mon deiu! Can't I try to let you initiate a simple date without having you assume the worst?"
England just glared in response and then turned his back to him
...
Prussia sighed and placed down his beer. There goes another pretty damn awesome S.A.D. drinking buddy. He looked at his younger brother and grinned. Well, at lest West was still there. They've had tons of awesome drinking days together! Plus, it's not like cute lil' Italy is going to come in here by himself and-
"Veeeeee!"
Germany turned towards the entrance, brow raised. "Brother, did you hear-"
Prussia grabbed the other's head and forcefully turned his gaze away from the door. "'s probably nothin'," he murmured. "Prob'ly just a siren or-"
"Veeeee! Geeeeeermany!!"
Prussia groaned and his palm had a nice meeting with his forehead. "Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me," he growled under his breath.
Sure, he thought the kid was cute, but it always irritated him when he clung to West. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
PINK... TOMATO?
Prussia, France, and Spain using lame pick up lines on random people in a big store for laughs. Bonus if they accidentally use one on a nation or two that they weren't expecting to see there.
France and Spain of the Bad Touch Friends Trio were currently hiding out in the most unused part in the large store, snickering, after a few successful and unsuccessful pranks.
(Of course they weren't giggling because 'Team Badtouch Tomato Awesome is too MANLY for that.)
"Mon deui, did you see how fast Gilbert ran," Francis exclaimed, ending with a hearty laugh. "I told him to check before he opened his mouth."
Antonio giggled snickered and peered over the corner of the section they were hiding in to see if Ivan was still around. "I've never seen anyone run that fast! I think he could've broken Lovi's record in fastest retreat!"
"If only I had recorded that," Francis tutted while fiddling with his cellphone. "I was busy laughing..."
"It was almost as funny as the time you tried!"
Francis shuddered. "Those young ladies were far too paranoid..." He gingerly touched a lock of his singed hair on the back of his head and cringed.
"I didn't even know that pepper spray was flammable!"
"Well, mon ami, now you know and we should take that into account... I knew I was going to get slapped or kicked around a few times, but getting my hair burnt off is not on that list."
Antonio checked outside of the aisle for Ivan again. "Sooo, should we wait for Gilbert to come back?"
Francis tried to call Gilbert's cell, but he wasn't picking up. "Non. I don't think he's coming back... Should we go out and find him?"
"It's my turn again, right? One last pick up line and we'll go," Antonio said while searching through the crowd for a target, bubbling with excitement.
"Up to you, mon ami. Please don't get distracted and try not to take an hour like last time-"
"Oh! The tomatoes are on sale!? Be right back!"
Antonio dashed off, completely forgetting what he was planning to do prior.
Francis sighed and leaned against the aisle.
"I'll give him 10 minutes..."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Antonio was a little disappointed when he noticed the tomatoes in the store were much smaller than the ones he grew. But a tomato is a tomato, so he picked up a nearby, empty shopping basket and began to toss several in.
"Let's see~ One for me, one for Romano, one for Feliciano, one for me, maybe three more for Romano since he loves them so much and another five for me-"
He saw a short-haired blonde in the cutest pink and white dress walk by and he snapped out of his tomato heaven stupor. He suddenly remembered the prank he was supposed to do and grinned.
It was perfect. She wasn't carrying anything, not even a purse, and she was alone. Plus the vegetable and fruit aisle didn't have any people besides Antonio and the blonde because the produce was pretty lacking.
Francis, who was spying on Antonio from a distance, saw the perfect opportunity as well.
"There is absolutely no way he can mess this up. All he has to do is calmly walk up to her, say -one- line in an attractive way and then walk away nonchalantly," he mumbled to himself.
He facepalmed when Antonio practically skipped over to the target and, with a bright smile, greeted her. If the blonde didn't oppose Antonio before he went into his tomato and Romano chatter, they would be there for hours, to Francis' despair.
Well, it was Antonio. The day Antonio decides to be sexy, smooth and to the point during one of their hijinks would be the day he stopped drinking wine and switched to drinking Arthur's gin.
As much as Francis didn't want to wish bad fortune onto his friend, he wanted the target to walk away or stop Antonio from blabbering.
The blonde turned her head to look at Antonio with a somewhat confused look on her face.
When she turned, Francis was able to see her face more clearly.
'Wait, she looks like...'
Antonio's smile grew when he saw her face.
"Hey there! You're much cuter close up! Even if tomatoes normally aren't pink, you could be my special toma-"
"Oh, like, you're that tomato dude that hangs out with Italy's, like, totally crazy brother!"
Antonio froze in mid sentence.
'That voice, why is it low!? And that accent a-and actually that hair and face looks familiar and... and...'
"F-Feliks?"
Feliks huffed. "Like, duh. By the way, what was with that tomato stuff you were talking about anyway?"
"Uh, well-"
"But, like, I totally hate tomatoes though. They're like, totally gross and kinda, like, weird."
"Huh!? But-"
Feliks continued to ignore Antonio as he blabbered on. "Well, I already forget why I came here in the first place! Anyway, Toris was yelling at me early about my dress, which is totally awesome and the best, and he's probably just, like, jealous. Also-"
"I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO CHANGE!"
Toris rushed towards Feliks, past Antonio, who was still a bit shocked about the fact that he mistook Feliks for a girl and the fact that there was someone that hated tomatoes. It looked like Toris had been running around a lot before, for he was panting for breath and looked like he was about to collapse.
Feliks pouted and crossed his arms. "Heeey, where have you been, Toris? You, like, totally ditched me earlier. So uncool."
"But you were the one that just left me before I could find better clothes for you," Toris groaned.
"This dress is totally better though."
"L-Look, let's just go back home," Toris sighed. "Ah, I'm sorry Antonio, I hope he didn't cause you any trouble?"
"No... It's fine."
"Aw, you're so not fun Toris."
Toris blushed as he dragged Feliks out of the aisle.
Francis sighed and walked over to Antonio, who had just mentally gotten over the fact that he mistook Feliks for a girl, but was still have trouble getting over the thought that someone found tomatoes disgusting.
"People have different tastes. It can't be helped."
"But tomatoes are the best..."
"As I said before, you can't do anything about that I'm afraid."
"But everybody I know loves tomatoes!"
"... Let's just go find Gilbert."
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
ALFRED/SODA STAIN, WHAT THE HELL, SELF?
Alfred, never one to wait for an invitation or permission, burst into Arthur's room with a half-filled cup of soda in one hand and a folder with pictures in the other.
He bounded to the middle of the room and posed in a comical and dramatic fashion, laughing boisterously.
"Ha ha ha! How was that entrance, Arthur? Pretty awesome-... huh?"
There was his bed, wardrobe, small and simple black couch, small book case and a very simple desk, but no Arthur... Alfred had peeked every room in his house, eager to boast about the new plane design he came up with last week, but Arthur was no where to be found. He was sure that Arthur would've been in his room if not in the kitchen, bathroom, dining room, living room, ect ect ect...
He should've suspected that Arthur wasn't home in the first place considering Alfred had to search through several potted plants outside in order to find the hidden spare house key. Hopefully Arthur won't notice a few 5 broken flower pots...
Alfred grumbled, tossed his folder onto the desk and plopped down onto the small couch and carefully put his soda cup down beside him.
"Well fine. I'll just wait for him to come back then!"
Alfred grinned. "I can't wait to see his face when he sees how awesome my designs art!"
He pumped his fist with gusto and stuck another pose, laughing, but because of that action, he tipped over his cup.
Alfred cursed and jolted off of the couch to avoid getting spilled on and by the time he grabbed the cup off the couch, all of its contents were now soaked onto the couch's soft surface.
"Aw man..." Alfred sighed and placed the cup on the floor a few feet away so that he wouldn't tip it over again. He came back closer to the couch and began to poke the hand-sized soda stain on the seat cushion.
He pouted. "What a waste of soda... It was my favorite kind too..."
Wait, I need to think of a way to hide this before Arthur comes back! I won't even get a chance to show off if he gets angry about this!
He looked around the room for anything he could use. Maybe he could put a pillow from the bed or a book from the bookcase on the stain and hope Arthur didn't pick it up by the time it dried? Then again, he didn't know when Arthur would be coming back... He doubted that Arthur had a blowdryer he could use... Maybe he could...
Alfred let out an aggravated sigh. "Geh, all of this worrying is making me thirsty!"
Unfortunately, he didn't bring anything else to drink. He doubted that there was anything to drink that he'd like in this house, he hated his tea since it wasn't sweet enough, and he couldn't go out to buy something since he didn't want Arthur to come back before he returned.
Alfred groaned and plopped back onto the couch. He absentmindedly looked around the room while trying to think of what to do quench his thirst and to hide the stain.
~~~SKDJFHKSLDFHLKSDJFH~~~
Just one lick...
He slowly lowered his head towards the stain.
I'm just licking a soda stain on a couch once! No harm in that, right?
With his face now only an inch above from his destination, he stuck out his tongue and slowly ran it across the damp, soft couch material. The faint taste of his soda was definitely there; sugary and sweet.
~~~JESUS CRUST WITH BUTTER D:~~~~
The couch... smells like him...
Alfred inhaled deeply and continued to grind his waist against the front of the couch.
"Hah... Arthur... Ngh..."
His smell, that taste, so soft, too hot... Such simple things blinded him as they flooded his senses.
"Wrong... This is so wrong, but I n-need... Hah..."
~~~~BAAAAA~~~~
"Oi, Alfred, you bastard! Would it kill you to not break into my bloody house uninvited- WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO MY COUCH?!"
Alfred immediately stopped dry humping the poor, abused couch and turned to face Arthur, eyes still slightly glazed with arousal.
The two just stared at each other for a few seconds. One with a horrified, shocked expression and the other was at a complete loss of words.
"Arthur! Y-you're finally back!"
"GET-"
"IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE. I SWEAR, I... TRIPPED!"
"LIKE HELL YOU DID. GET OUT NOW!"