Why??
"Throwing the dog a treat" (quote by father) as he threw the dog treat at my mother.
What the heck??? Does he have no respect? I know it was probably a joke, but to us "women" its just another insult. It's not like even remotely close to a joke to me!! I would use profanity right now, but after the incident with my father reading my journal, I wouldnt dare.
Unfortunatly I dont know when Zach or Dean is coming home, Zach is giving me a hoodie! Im so excited, Its a Rancid one, and I've wanted a Rancid one for a while now. Thanks Zach. Zach is so great, hes one of my best friends, I can talk to him about anything. I can with Dean to, but I think at times he doesnt understand where Im coming from, and he, at times, isnt very helpfull with my problems like Zach. I really do appreciate all the things that Dean has helped me through though. He is such a dedicated boyfriend. Ok, Im not gonna lie, at times I think skateboarding to him is more important to him than I am. I'm not gonna dump him because it is though, because unlike other girlfriends Im dedicated too, and I support him in all of his decisions, and I think that is the best way.
Dean was always helpful to me though when I needed him, like when my parents have fights Im pretty sure his brother would come pick me up if it was really important, and Dean said I was always welcome to his house if my parents are having a party ( I dont want to go into details with them and there partys, I just dont like when they drink) and all I have to do is call. Im really a lucky girl to have Dean, although its hard to go out with some one, when quite a bit of girls like him. But I guess you could say Im used to it, because I know they can never have him :-D. ( how come that looked like a penis) lol.
But unlike Zach, Dean really hasnt been through the same thing as me, and Zach says things alot more thoughtful than Dean does, I guess you could say..."Zach has a way with his words" because when he says things to me when I tell him my problems, He always makes me happier and they always make me smile, and Im not saying Im in love with Zach, because I am in love with Dean, Zach is just a good friend that helps alot.
But see Zach wouldnt just come over to hold me if I was crying, Dean would, and I love Dean for that. If I was ever in need of a hug, Dean would be there right at my door, Zach would probaly give me a hug, but Dean would make it seem so much better, just to have him hold me, would make me forget about everything, just to cry in his arms and him whisper "its gonna be alright" will make me forget about everything.
Wow, this whole journal entry was mostly about Zach and Dean, I hate it when there both gone, see if Dean is gone I would call Zach, because of course I would be over reacting and crying because Dean would be gone for a day, but thats just how I act, so get over it. But with them both gone! I have no one to talk to....besides Jackie and Jamie and Lindsay, lol but I mean guys, because I talk about alot of different things with Zach and Dean, than my friends that are girls. No offense to all of my girl-friends because I still think your great! oh and I decided to make my font small and bold, ok. lol. (random) anyways....Zach and Dean...Crap I lost my train of thought, I hate when that happens cause I start to say like alot, which I have found out today when I was in the hot tub with Joey, telling him a story and listening to someone else tell a story at the same time.
AH HA!!! I found out what I wanted to say.... alright my age is 13 but do you think it would be wrong to want your relationship with your boyfriend to start getting more "intimate"? I'm not saying sex, or anything like that, cause im not ready, and I know for a fact Dean isnt either. I'm mean its been almost 2 years, and we've barely done anything. I wouldnt even call when we kiss, making-out either! only because its not like in movies where they kiss for like ever and its all wonderful, lol, and thats kinda what I want. But movie kissing is just so perfect, and no kissing can compare! When me and Dean kiss, ya I guess you could say its nice, but its not very romantic, I've always wanted to make out in the rain! and that chance, I can tell you, will never come. ( GOD I SOUND LIKE A FREAKING RETARD TELLING EVERYONE IN THE WORLD THAT I WANT TO KISS LIKE THE PEOPLE IN MOVIES) or like going to a beach and making out in the sand!! I've always wanted that, and its never gonna happen!! and its pissing me off, and I wish for my b-day Dean could take me out to the movies or take me to a nice restaurant or something! I mean its been almost 2 years, and we've never been on a real date! how pathetic huh? but most of it was because my mom said I wasnt aloud, and well Deans mom was just not liking me at the time, do I dont really blaim dean? I blaim the parentals. But now my parents trust Dean, and so they wouldnt mind, and I dont think Deans would either. It seems like shes's changed alot since she's met me. Wow that makes me super special!
Wow I have written alot, maybe because I have nothing better to do...Im bored. lol.
Well I am done writing, but I will update again soon.
G'day Kiddies,
-Ileta