My life is not my own
I sat outside and thought for awhile tonight. Thought about my continued place in the military and whether or not I should get out in a few months. I had this romanticized view of the service when I got out initially and now that I'm back in I can't help but wonder if this is the right path for me. Do I need the service to be hooah? To be a better person? Nah, that I've determined after being here for 10 months. So what is the answer? When I get back I could re-class into something more suited to my talents but what if I learn that that too is a dead-end such as the one I languish in now. What I've figured out is that the service was a necessary First Step in my evolution but now that time has come to a close. The service is stifling me and I can't afford to waste any more time. One of my smaller regrets was not going to West Point, looking at some of the LT's around here I'd say that was a blessing in disguise. My time here has showed me that just because you come from a prestigous school doesn't necessarily preclude you from being a complete incompetent. I can still retain the Military Values while a civilian and still live the Military Values better AS a civilian than most of the fucks I am forced to see on a daily basis. Loyalty, Duty, Respect, Selfless Service, Honor, Integrity, Personal Courage, these things memorized ad nauseum by folks here and generally forgotten about, I will extoll. I can find greater success and personal fortune out of the military I feel. The idea of becoming a civilian again is almost intoxicating. I miss my goattee.....
Until next time
Until next time