About, and for, Perkins
[07/26/2007 11:51] zug is here: I don't know. Eric only gets what he wants to get
[07/26/2007 11:51] zug is here: you're trying to feed him information he isn't really interested in hearing, as much as he says (and maybe even thinks) he is
[07/26/2007 11:51] eldritch74: which i also pointed out to him
[07/26/2007 11:51] eldritch74: told him he was being solipsistic
[07/26/2007 11:55] eldritch74: because he only hears what he wants to hear and refutes what he does not.
[07/26/2007 11:55] zug is here: I honestly, at this point, don't think he's going to change until there's a major upheaval in his life that forces him to take action
[07/26/2007 11:56] zug is here: i thought nae might be that upheaval... but he was too needy for her
[07/26/2007 11:56] eldritch74: heh
[07/26/2007 11:56] zug is here: he can't "just change"... he can't wrap his head around the 'just do it already' philosophy
[07/26/2007 11:56] eldritch74: i know
[07/26/2007 11:57] zug is here: in his head, changes are gargantuan beasts which must have every angle carefully considered before daring to act, lest you make a misstep
[07/26/2007 11:57] zug is here: instead of something you just do, then see how it works
[07/26/2007 11:57] eldritch74: right
[07/26/2007 11:57] eldritch74: i know this :P
[07/26/2007 11:57] zug is here: I know you do, but yet you keep giving him help/advice
[07/26/2007 11:57] eldritch74: he kept saying that last night
[07/26/2007 11:57] zug is here: when we both know it'll make zero difference
[07/26/2007 11:57] eldritch74: eh
[07/26/2007 11:58] zug is here: He'll hear it, and will thank you for it, and promptly forget all of it
[07/26/2007 11:58] eldritch74: sin duda.
[07/26/2007 11:58] eldritch74: but at least i can say i gave a whole-hearted effort.
[07/26/2007 11:59] zug is here: The only possible way you could get through to him is to somehow demonstrate through words that his idea of change itself is all wrong
[07/26/2007 11:59] zug is here: i've never been able to get that past him... saying "dude, just fucking do it" doesn't get through to him
[07/26/2007 11:59] zug is here: I don't know how else to put it
[07/26/2007 11:59] zug is here: Perhaps somebody could like him the "30 days" steve pavlina article that talks about making a life change for 30 days and evaluating it
[07/26/2007 12:00] zug is here: I'm not sure that anything can get through to him
[07/26/2007 12:00] zug is here: and if you handhold him through the process, he won't ever internalize that change is not difficult... he'll see you wrestling the gargantuan beast, without realizing there's no beast at all
[07/26/2007 12:00] eldritch74: probaly not
The article: http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/04/30-days-to-success/
[07/26/2007 11:51] zug is here: you're trying to feed him information he isn't really interested in hearing, as much as he says (and maybe even thinks) he is
[07/26/2007 11:51] eldritch74: which i also pointed out to him
[07/26/2007 11:51] eldritch74: told him he was being solipsistic
[07/26/2007 11:55] eldritch74: because he only hears what he wants to hear and refutes what he does not.
[07/26/2007 11:55] zug is here: I honestly, at this point, don't think he's going to change until there's a major upheaval in his life that forces him to take action
[07/26/2007 11:56] zug is here: i thought nae might be that upheaval... but he was too needy for her
[07/26/2007 11:56] eldritch74: heh
[07/26/2007 11:56] zug is here: he can't "just change"... he can't wrap his head around the 'just do it already' philosophy
[07/26/2007 11:56] eldritch74: i know
[07/26/2007 11:57] zug is here: in his head, changes are gargantuan beasts which must have every angle carefully considered before daring to act, lest you make a misstep
[07/26/2007 11:57] zug is here: instead of something you just do, then see how it works
[07/26/2007 11:57] eldritch74: right
[07/26/2007 11:57] eldritch74: i know this :P
[07/26/2007 11:57] zug is here: I know you do, but yet you keep giving him help/advice
[07/26/2007 11:57] eldritch74: he kept saying that last night
[07/26/2007 11:57] zug is here: when we both know it'll make zero difference
[07/26/2007 11:57] eldritch74: eh
[07/26/2007 11:58] zug is here: He'll hear it, and will thank you for it, and promptly forget all of it
[07/26/2007 11:58] eldritch74: sin duda.
[07/26/2007 11:58] eldritch74: but at least i can say i gave a whole-hearted effort.
[07/26/2007 11:59] zug is here: The only possible way you could get through to him is to somehow demonstrate through words that his idea of change itself is all wrong
[07/26/2007 11:59] zug is here: i've never been able to get that past him... saying "dude, just fucking do it" doesn't get through to him
[07/26/2007 11:59] zug is here: I don't know how else to put it
[07/26/2007 11:59] zug is here: Perhaps somebody could like him the "30 days" steve pavlina article that talks about making a life change for 30 days and evaluating it
[07/26/2007 12:00] zug is here: I'm not sure that anything can get through to him
[07/26/2007 12:00] zug is here: and if you handhold him through the process, he won't ever internalize that change is not difficult... he'll see you wrestling the gargantuan beast, without realizing there's no beast at all
[07/26/2007 12:00] eldritch74: probaly not
The article: http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/04/30-days-to-success/