Caution: This one isnt' pretty...
The switchfoot concert Thursday left me in a spiritual euphoria only those who experienced it with me could understand. I knew it would last awhile, and i knew it would end. The question was how long, and how soon.
Its not your fault, dont think that it is. it was a number of things compounding to the end, and now im back where i was before, not bad not great, but nothing more. Its not your fault and im not blaming you, but you did start it, and you saw it through.
I dont appreciate your lies, and your untold secrets. Dont call me to oppologize, i dont care to listen. I knew before you said a word, your tone of voice told the story. I knew something was up the second you said her name. you didnt care to explain, but i knew. I hung up the phone perturbed...pissed off...and done. Done with trying to keep you in my close circle, done with trying to fill you in, done with with the effort of trying to make this work, because its not. You did not know this...no one did.
you called me later to fill me in, on the hunches i already had. you proved me right...again. You had been dating her for awhile, but i never heard her name till just then...some kind of best friend.
I dont appreciate the way you got on my case for questioning you. When later you did exactly what i figured you'd do. You punked out again, and i could have really been screwed, but on top of it all you lied. you should have told me the truth when i asked you, instead of making me feel wrong for inquiring. Im sorry if youve taught me that i have to watch my back....
I dont appreciate the way i tried so hard, and put up with so much...to have you end it like this.
So here we are, at the end of this little rant and ramble. I think its important to note that I'm not mad for what you are doing. by all means, i support whatever endeavor you deem necessary. But if you respected me at all as a person and a friend, I should not have found out this way. You disrespected me in the way you didnt want to tell me about her, in the way you decided to when you were having problems, im sorry buddy but im holding no sympathy. You disrespected me when you lied, and then decided to tell me the truth...does your concience feel better? cuz ive felt like crap all weekend. i never expected that from you...after all that we've been through and talked about, you throw it away in an instant, along with my respect. I know thats why you didnt tell me. i know thats why you lied. I know you didnt want to hurt me or worry me. I thought you would know better, with all the times you asked me to just be up front and honest.
Dont applogize, dont reply. I dont care to listen right now.
I hope this is making it easier on you....really.
Its not your fault, dont think that it is. it was a number of things compounding to the end, and now im back where i was before, not bad not great, but nothing more. Its not your fault and im not blaming you, but you did start it, and you saw it through.
I dont appreciate your lies, and your untold secrets. Dont call me to oppologize, i dont care to listen. I knew before you said a word, your tone of voice told the story. I knew something was up the second you said her name. you didnt care to explain, but i knew. I hung up the phone perturbed...pissed off...and done. Done with trying to keep you in my close circle, done with trying to fill you in, done with with the effort of trying to make this work, because its not. You did not know this...no one did.
you called me later to fill me in, on the hunches i already had. you proved me right...again. You had been dating her for awhile, but i never heard her name till just then...some kind of best friend.
I dont appreciate the way you got on my case for questioning you. When later you did exactly what i figured you'd do. You punked out again, and i could have really been screwed, but on top of it all you lied. you should have told me the truth when i asked you, instead of making me feel wrong for inquiring. Im sorry if youve taught me that i have to watch my back....
I dont appreciate the way i tried so hard, and put up with so much...to have you end it like this.
So here we are, at the end of this little rant and ramble. I think its important to note that I'm not mad for what you are doing. by all means, i support whatever endeavor you deem necessary. But if you respected me at all as a person and a friend, I should not have found out this way. You disrespected me in the way you didnt want to tell me about her, in the way you decided to when you were having problems, im sorry buddy but im holding no sympathy. You disrespected me when you lied, and then decided to tell me the truth...does your concience feel better? cuz ive felt like crap all weekend. i never expected that from you...after all that we've been through and talked about, you throw it away in an instant, along with my respect. I know thats why you didnt tell me. i know thats why you lied. I know you didnt want to hurt me or worry me. I thought you would know better, with all the times you asked me to just be up front and honest.
Dont applogize, dont reply. I dont care to listen right now.
I hope this is making it easier on you....really.