I don't get me
What is so wrong with doing homework? I mean, why don't I do it? I'm slightly better now, I am completing all of my labs on time, but homework is constantly an issue. And I have been in a bad mood for over a month now. Intermittent with being happy, of course, but in general in a bad mood. Always on the verge of tears. Always wondering what is wrong with me. What is wrong with me? What is my aversion to completing assignments? What am I fighting, or trying to prove? I don't get me. I stay home from class and get nothing done and always feel like crap. Seriously. I have had 4 sore throats- 2 of them strep- so far this year. i also had the flu over winter break, though that was in December. but why is my body shutting down? i don't get it. my brain doesn't feel stimulated anymore by anything, i just have headaches all the time. i have no desire to do or to be or anything. i don't want to be sick, i don't want to be depressed, i just want to get out of this rut that I'm caught in but i don't know how. theoretically i could exercise more and do my homework and study more and go out and do things more, but it won't happen. i wish i had the will to tackle life. right now it is controlling me instead of me controlling it. and i dont know how to take control. i have never been the controlling forward upfront type. i am passive. and i dont thing i have the will to change.