025.
the night, if anything, was a complete paradox.
the further the road stretched, the longer the cars went on and the more opposing our spines became. this was suppose to be it, the moment of magic and everything we had turned our faces towards in hope for the past few months. instead, we were breathing in frustration and exhaust. we turned to a catalyst, passing it back and forth for all to see. it cast shadows on his wrinkled brow and my cracked knuckles. i became an enigma of sharp worries and apologies and he turned to the color yellow, saying it's okay,
by the time we showed up, i felt like we were walking in the middle of some lengthy conversation. the music traveled it's way down to us and our parked car, and we followed it feet first. cars were still lined up and waiting to get in, hours overdue. everyone was running and soon my feet were moving quickly, too. (baby, baby how much have we missed?)
we reached the top of the venue and stood up, resembling cherries on top of a melting sundae. this was it, though, this was it. i kept turning to him and saying, "it was worth it, anyways, it was. they're playing these songs and look at all these people!, everyone's so happy."
they played green eyes and i couldn't contain myself.
soon, though, it became: baby, baby, my face is so white and i don't feel so well. darling, i'd help hold your head back but you've cut it all off. baby, baby, i've ruined everything, i can't think but in circles. darling darling, just go to sleep, when you wake up, you'll be home. baby, baby, i'm so sorry. i'm so sorry.
i had never felt like i had ruined something meant to be so perfect before. this was a new sharp sting.
i think i said a hundred apologies that night before i curled up in the passenger seat with my blanket and him at the wheel, steering us away from what was suppose to be everything ideal.