(no subject)
A broken Heart is not what I wanted from this
but I guess I've learned from this
But arent you supposed to learn from your mistakes
I don't consider this a mistake
I just wish the story didnt end this way
'Cause I'm still in love with the person helped me write it
Remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go
Remember when we talked of where we'd be a year from now
Frazzled, thats all I can say now. I dont write in this thing as much because I hate typing now that I have done 7 college apps. and a crap load of work and projects. Speaking about work, I still have my job and even work ::gasp:: two days a week. hah. But anyway, if matt and me were to still be going out, it would be a year on friday. I dont even know why, im thinking about it, but the 12th, maybe cause its my birthday day just always sticks out I guess and guys will think this is kinda nerotic, but girls know, they remember everything. To be like just totally honest, I miss talking to him, the way we used to talk. Not soo much the going out part because put it anyway I like, we went out for practically for 7 months, and I was rejected, more or less in a bad way, but I still felt the same. I poured my heart out one night in a text to him, saying how much I just missed hanging out and talking and whatnot, but I never got a response, which inturn turned into a sign. I wish I just could go back to summer and not act the way I did when I was around and just be like, im not obessed with you, and you can do whatever you want, but when you need someone to talk to, I just hope im the person you come to. and I def didnt say that, actually, I acted soo freaking dumb around him it was pretty pathetic. I was never the close to someone, and never had someone know so much about me, me know so much about them, and have it just all end infront of me. im not going to lie, breaking up sucks, a lot, esp. if its before your finals. But its the not the worse thing that could happen and I hate people that make theres out to seem that way. It was rough, I mean I feel like the person who changed me so much, for the better, walked out, and I thought for a while they didnt even care. it was a while ago tho but I never wrote about it, in here I mean. I actually saw him today, we were in town I wanted to say hello, and he looked great, and looked happy which just actually made me really happy. I still, I like it when we talk, even tho its not like it was, he just makes me happy because he just has this way, I dont know. I just dont know, time goes by way to fast, I was looking at pictures I have from this time last year, and wanta cry and just laugh at the same time. Whether its with me and matt or friends, there just such good memories from track and school and making new friends, and the cookie monster doll I still have, and lunch, and the last of the sweet sixteens...
such good memories
goodnight, <3 danielle
and I still think I miss it all