(no subject)

[respirez_pas]

the emotional coccoon.
am i the only one in it?
i'm too scared to be vulnerable
but every time i reach my hand out for something
it gets slapped away, and the thing gets
further and further
from my reach.

i want to say that i will "stop trying"
but there's still an irritating sense of hope
that yeah,
things will work out for me
but of course, they never do
and i relish stupid moments that dont mean anything
at the end of the day,
i cant figure out if i want to shoot myself in the head
or play the smiths.

usually its both.

i want summer to come.
i want boys to go away
and i want couples to just fall off a cliff
and never make their love known.

i am soooo frustrated with the opposite sex
i want to go on a bike ride to jerusalem.