Writing story, Rosengarten: Fallen
I love to make up stories and write. Well lately I've been taking some of my older rp stories I use to do on AIM and saved, and now am rewriting them into a mini book. :D This particular story is based off of one of my main characters, Thanonisco Massiv or Thanos. Who is a fallen angel and time walker. He has a long story but it's quite interesting the people he comes across.
In this scene he gave Ayria (his step sister) the ring he was going to use to propose to Kraven as a farewell. He was finally over it all, crushed by having been cheated and forsaken by Kraven, one of his true loves. So he went to cast his human body into the sea of souls so that he could return to hell, the underworld from where originally he avoids. The reason why he avoids going back into the underworld is because it is difficult to find a body host for him to come to Earth, where he would prefer to be.
This is just the end of the chapter and first book. I have retyped this part many times just tweeking it for effect and would like someone else feedback and critizism! So please let me know what you think! ! ^_^
::Chapter Fallen::
Thanos turned from Kraven, slowly walking to the doorway. With a quick glance back at Kraven sitting on the bed, he turned and closed the door behind him. Kraven could hear Thanos's boots clunk against the ground as he walked out of the room. A bright flash of yellow light could be seen underneath the door slithers and then silence.
He was finally gone.
Leaving Kraven Valentine alone and shaking on the bed, his eyes red and watering up. Quietly sitting there he could only think about what had just happened. He was such a horrible person, how could he do this to Thanos, who remained faithful by his side throughout his time when he was so insecure. The guilt started filling him to shake a little in grief and regret.
Minutes later which felt like hours to Kraven, another yellow flash came from the door corners. Slowly the door creaked open. He looking up almost in disbelief as a tiny figure with long blonde hair poked her face from behind the door. "Kkkraven?” Ayria's voice wailed through the silence, "Kkraven iit's me." She slowly paused and timidly walking through the doorway, anxiously spinning her head every which way looking about the room. Kraven still somewhat shocked, sat there unmoved.
"Where is Thanos? Is he here? Thanos where is HE? Pleease? I must speak to him,” she asked impatiently and quickly. Kraven looked up from where he sat on the bed side looking up at her with big teary eyes. She knew in her heart what had happened but hated to admit it. Kraven's mouth tried to move but no words came out. She went to his side kneeling on the floor in front of him. "Thanos, he is gone.", he found the words too difficult to say.
Ayria tears welling up in her eyes she held up a tiny little box from her hand, "He-he-he-he, wanted you to have this, before he left, he-he said to give it to you, would be good for you." She held out her petite hand with a tiny black velvet box in her palm. Slowly Kraven leaned forward took it from her, opened it carefully.
Inside was a thin gold band ring and set in the center was a gorgeous sparkling blood red Blackstone. Kraven remembering the same stones used to buy Xarius free of his father. Containing himself any longer, let loose a wave of tears that were followed by muffed screams as Ayria pulled Kraven's face into her shoulder. "Kraven, he really is gone... I c-can feel him, h-he's d-done with Earth,” she barely managed the words as she began to sob for the first time for her brother.
Kraven loosening his hand let the ring box go, dropping it to the floor. "Oh god no."
Thanos was standing on top of a very large mountainside by a shimmering blue ocean. That happened to be the same mountainside is where he took Kraven long ago, to profess his love for him.
As Thanos just stood on the edge of the cliff, he arched back sprouting out his long black feathery wings with shimmering golden tips. His hair growing extremely long and straight grey, whipped around his legs and massive wings, tangling in them in the wind. He looked down through now red eyes, scanning the endless sky below, that only he knew where led to.
"And so, this Fallen Angel, falls again...” he proclaimed, his voice carried into the wind. Extending out his arms in one last effort now outspread his beauteous wings and then took a step forward. The anticipation caught in his heart but he knew it had to be done. Lunging forward, his arms flying back, his hair caught up in his body on an elegant slow descent, of cascading silver hair into the sea below.
Fall from grace.