Jun 16, 2005 12:23
used, abused, cheated.
i hate being lied to, i hate being taken advantage of.
i've been betrayed by most people that come into my life, and i can't help but forget about anything and everything they do. why? because i let them.
being nice is my persona, my being. i've tried being stern. i'm done. i'm tired of the smartass remarks. i'm sick of hearing opinions about myself from those other than the beholder.
i won't let this CRAP bring me down anymore. be prepared to see my ugly side. i've let things go for far too long. i hate to be like this, but you can only get kicked in the face...oh so many times. i don't care what anyone thinks about me anymore. i'd rather be disliked for something i've ACTUALLY done and said. so here it begins.
i usually let things go, i find it hard to hold things against people, because i make so many mistakes myself...but i've finally reached the point of no return.
i hold back, keep it to myself, try to keep face. that's what has gotten me here. a place where i have valid reason to be insecure about any kind of positive figures in my life. here on out, your getting the real review. if you can spill it, i will scoop it up and throw it back in your face.
to be honest, i'm tired of being relied on. who the hell can i trust, who do i get to lean on? i stand just fine on my own, but it's nice to know that if needed, you can turn to someone. i hate getting to this point, but it's only making me stronger. i'm broke, i'm poor, i'm struggling. let me recooperate.