Now, I've never considered myself a horror fan. EVER. My mom claims that when I was a year old, I screamed at Maggie Simpson's head going round and round during an episode of Treehouse Of Horror. I still get a little bit scared at the ending of Shaun of the Dead.
However, my life has been taken over by the insanity that is The Evil Dead and I LOVE every bit of it. To the first movie to musical and even some of the comics. So here's my rather long and cracked out tribute to the only horror movie franchise I've ever claimed to love.
Overture: 'Do The Necronomicon'~Off-Broadway Cast of Evil Dead: The Musical
Deadite always like to get their freak on
And when we get together we do the Necronomicon
A tribute to the epicness that is Evil Dead: The Musical. Plus, it's just a perfect opening to this insanity.
ACT I: The Evil Dead
'Holiday'~Weezer
Let's go away for a while
You and I
To a strange and distant land
Where they speak no word of truth
But we don't understand anyway
Yeah! Go take a vacation in an abandoned cabin in the woods with all of your closest friends! That'll end well!
'Thriller'~Michael Jackson
It's close to midnight and something evil's lurking in the dark
Want to make the first two Evil Dead movies more fun? Shout "DA-NAAAAAA!" every time a Deadite pops into frame.
'Good Girls Go Bad'~Cobra Starship feat. Leighton Meester
I make them good girls go bad
You play one tape of a professor reciting words from The Book of the Dead and all of a sudden, you get raped by a tree, your window gets broken by shakey cam, you get stabbed in the ankle by a pencil and you're an evil Candarian Demon.
'(I Just) Died In Your Arms'~Cutting Crew
Oh I, I just died in your arms tonight
Dramatic song for Scotty and Ash.
'Bad Romance'~Lady GaGa
I want your ugly
I want your disease
...
I want your horror
I want your design
...
I want your love and
I want your revenge
You and me could write a bad romance
"KILL HER IF YOU CAN, LOVER BOY!"
'Heads Will Roll'~Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Off with your head
Dance until you're dead
Heads will roll
Heads will roll
Heads will roll
Heads will roll
On the floor
Decapitation by Shovel: A move later stolen by Herbert West.
'Life's So Hard'~Marc With A C
I'm so sad
I'm Fifteen
Life's So Hard
LIFE'S SO HARD
Ash's life sucks pretty hard by the end of the first film.
'Here Comes The Sun'~The Beatles
Here comes the sun, here comes the sun,
and I say it's all right
Why was Ash so convinced that waiting until morning was going to make everything okay?
ACT II: Evil Dead 2: Dead By Dawn
'The Time Warp'~The Cast of The Rocky Horror Picture Show
It's astounding, time is fleeting
Madness takes its toll
But listen closely, not for very much longer
I've got to keep control
Wait...Linda's alive again? Where are the other guys? He's playing the tape again?! LINDA'S A DEADITE AGAIN?! IS THIS A REMAKE OR A SEQUEL?! MAKE UP YOUR MIND, SAM!
'U & Ur Hand'~Pink
It's just u and ur hand tonight
Get it? GET IT?!
'Let's Go Crazy'~Prince and the Revolution
We're all excited
But we don't know why
Maybe it's cuz
We're all gonna die
Out of all the songs I pick for Ash's insanity, I go with this one. Well, Prince is my favorite nutbar.
'Cotton Eyed Joe'~Rednex
Where did you come from where did you go
Where did you come from Cotton-Eye Joe
Just where did Jake come from anyway?
'Redundant'~Green Day
We're living in repetition.
Content in the same old shtick again.
To take a quote from Evil Dead: The Musical on why Bobbi Jo wasn't in the play: "I figured with that Cheryl girl getting attacked by the trees and all, Bobbi Jo would have appeared to be useless and redundant."
'Devil Inside'~INXS
The devil inside
The devil inside
Every single one of us the devil inside
Deadite Ash...Deadite Eddie...The witch in the Cellar...
'It's Warmer In The Basement'~Cobra Starship
You can't escape now
I've got you locked inside this room
That fucking Fruit Cellar just becomes the bane of Ash's existence.
'Smooth Criminal'~Michael Jackson
Annie Are You OK?
So, Annie Are You OK
Are You OK, Annie
NO SHE IS NOT!
'Time Warp Playout'~2009 European Touring Cast of The Rocky Horror Show
Let's do the time warp again!
Ash getting sucked through the hole to 1300. Or: The Evil Dead franchise in a nutshell.
ACT III: Army Of Darkness
(What the actual fuck, Japan?)
'Slave Labor'~Mariachi El Bronx
Live like a slave
With no holiday
"My name is Ash and I am a slave."
'Asshole'~Denis Leary
Maybe I shouldn't be singing this song
Ranting and raving and carrying on
Maybe they're right when they tell me I'm wrong...
NAAAAH!
Over the course of three films, Ash goes from skinny little cowardly kid to ripped and kind of a jerk. Man, cutting off your own hand does WONDERS!
'I Hate Myself For Loving You'~Joan Jett and the Blackhearts
I hate myself for loving you
Can't break free from the the things that you do.
I wanna walk but I run back to you, that's why
I hate myself for loving you
After much deliberation, this became Shelia's song. "First you wanna kill me. Now you wanna kiss me."
'My Own Worse Enemy'~Lit
It's no surprise to me I am my own worst enemy,
Cuz every now and then I kick the living shit out of me
I got my own handbasket, thank you.
'Come Alive (The War Of the Roses)'~Janelle Monae
We're dancing in the dungeon every Monday night
That's when we come alive!
Great...Ash fucked up the words and the Dead rise again. WE'RE FUCKED EVERYONE!
'When You're Evil'~Voltaire
And it's so easy when you're evil
This is the life, you see
The Devil tips his hat to me
I do it all because I'm evil
And I do it all for free
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need
DNW BAD!ASH'S SUGAR! D:
'I'll Make A Man Out Of You'~Donny Osmond and Chorus
Let's get down to business
To defeat the Huns Deadites
Did they send me daughters
When I asked for sons?
You're the saddest bunch
I ever met
But you can bet
Before we're through
Mister, I'll make a man
out of you
God, even this film had a montage.
'Hungarian Wedding Song'~Tori Amos
When you said you'd marry me
I thought you meant you'd wanted too
Then I thought you'd like to
Maybe on a Tuesday
All the dead are coming
I heard they'll be dressing
Something kind of maggoty
Rolling with a-froppity
Bad!Ash/Bad!Shelia
'Dia De Los Muertos (Day of the Dead)'~Voltaire
Día de los Muertos, cien calacas vió
Oh, oh, oh, y el gringo se asustó
Día de los Muertos, el cabrón se arrugó
Oh, oh, oh, aquí en México.
I could have chosen something grand and epic for the final battle, but Voltaire singing about the dead coming to life in Mexico seemed appropriate too.
'Victory Fanfare'~Final Fantasy III
Instrumental
WOOO! WE DEFEATED THE DEADITE ARMY!
'Fatso's Theme (Play Him Off, Keyboard Cat!)'~Keyboard Cat
Instrumental
Original "I SLEPT TOO LONG!" ending. Such a Keyboard Cat moment.
'Do The Bruce Campbell'~MC Lars and YTCracker feat. Schaffer the Darklord and ZeaLouS1
Get on the floor and do the Bruce Campbell
Get on the mic wax a chump like a candle
Four MCs, we're more than you can handle
Protect your neck and do the Bruce Campbell
The S-Mart ending, which is my preferred ending. Badassery all around.
Postlude: 'Don't Stop Me Now'~Queen
Tonight I'm gonna have myself a real good time
I feel alive and the world it's turning inside out Yeah!
I'm floating around in ecstasy
So don't stop me now don't stop me
'Cause I'm having a good time having a good time
Just my own little tribute to Shaun Of The Dead, which is a fine successor to The Evil Dead.
Download:
Zip File from Mediafire Enjoy the mix! Feel free to leave comments or ask for individual songs if you want.