Let me out of here
Maybe I shouldn't do theatre anymore...
I just got back from my audition for Winter Generals. I did really well, I did a very good rendition of King of the World and then hit a home run with Lonely House. Even tho I technically can't be in shows for winter, the people from Into the Woods seemed really impressed and asked me to fill out a form for them, so I was like, "Hey, that's a really good sign, right? They thought I did good. Maybe I _can_ succeed here even with all the competition. Heck, maybe I can do the Dolphin Show AND production."
So I hung back after to finish filling out the form, and someone in the next group did King of the World.
Yeah, he did.
And he did it twenty times better than me.
And I'm not saying that because I'm being hard on myself or that I'm doubting myself or anything. I'm saying it because it was a fact.
It's not that I'm upset that I'm not THE BEST anymore. I know I'm not. But I just want a chance, and I won't ever have a chance if people like that can one up me for every song, every monologue, every effort I put in.
I gave it my all in that audition, I didn't hold back.
I don't know if I'm cut out for this line of work. But I have to keep going. If I give up now, I know I'll get to be 40 and go through a mid-life crisis regretting the fact I didn't stay with it. I could even see that happening when I'm 30 or even 20... I can't give up because I never know what could be in store for me. I just don't if I have the constitution to continue to put myself on the line and be rejected so easily.
It's just frusterating to be in a possition that I neve have been in before... This is just really strange... I know I'll get over it and it'll all be fine, but damn it. I know I have some talent, and I know that I need to hone and perfect it, but I can only do that if I get experience.
Give me the experience, Northwestern, that's all I'm asking. Is that too much to ask?
I just got back from my audition for Winter Generals. I did really well, I did a very good rendition of King of the World and then hit a home run with Lonely House. Even tho I technically can't be in shows for winter, the people from Into the Woods seemed really impressed and asked me to fill out a form for them, so I was like, "Hey, that's a really good sign, right? They thought I did good. Maybe I _can_ succeed here even with all the competition. Heck, maybe I can do the Dolphin Show AND production."
So I hung back after to finish filling out the form, and someone in the next group did King of the World.
Yeah, he did.
And he did it twenty times better than me.
And I'm not saying that because I'm being hard on myself or that I'm doubting myself or anything. I'm saying it because it was a fact.
It's not that I'm upset that I'm not THE BEST anymore. I know I'm not. But I just want a chance, and I won't ever have a chance if people like that can one up me for every song, every monologue, every effort I put in.
I gave it my all in that audition, I didn't hold back.
I don't know if I'm cut out for this line of work. But I have to keep going. If I give up now, I know I'll get to be 40 and go through a mid-life crisis regretting the fact I didn't stay with it. I could even see that happening when I'm 30 or even 20... I can't give up because I never know what could be in store for me. I just don't if I have the constitution to continue to put myself on the line and be rejected so easily.
It's just frusterating to be in a possition that I neve have been in before... This is just really strange... I know I'll get over it and it'll all be fine, but damn it. I know I have some talent, and I know that I need to hone and perfect it, but I can only do that if I get experience.
Give me the experience, Northwestern, that's all I'm asking. Is that too much to ask?