(no subject)
I'm so fucking.... confused. I'm tired, I haven't had much sleep for the past 3 days, no more than 5 hours every night. I have the drivers ed test tomorrow, and I have to study for that religion class thing too.
I found out some stuff about Cole, but I'm not going to get into that because you're probably not interested. I have a shit load of stuff on my mind but there's no one to talk to about that would really understand. I'm keeping a diary again because it's the only thing I can really vent to.
I'm not going to Canada anymore, because my Uncle's condition got worse, and everyone has to take care of him and if I'm there it's too much of a hassle. My day is just going great isn't it?
I tell everyone I don't want a boyfriend. But I really kind of do, someone who loves me unconditionally, and would listen to my problems and take me away. But who wouldn't right? It's just I can never find anyone who can put up with me and my bitch-fits. And I'm encapable of changing myself, it's easier to convince myself that I don't need someone than to change myself for someone to love me.
And the people who do like me or have dumb little crushes on me, don't even really know me. Telling me that they like me may get a bit of my attention, but I seriously won't even give them a time of day. Because that doesn't impress me. Once they get to know me they'll probably stop liking me anyways...
I can't forget about this one guy. Everything happened so long ago... when I say long I meant a couple years back. Everytime when I see him again I feel the same way I did the first time. But nothing will ever happen... because of what I did a long time ago. I'd give anything to change that, but I can't. Life sucks boo hoo, I'm whining like a fucking baby. If you don't like it don't read it.
One last thing...
What do you think of when you look at the person you really like?
I found out some stuff about Cole, but I'm not going to get into that because you're probably not interested. I have a shit load of stuff on my mind but there's no one to talk to about that would really understand. I'm keeping a diary again because it's the only thing I can really vent to.
I'm not going to Canada anymore, because my Uncle's condition got worse, and everyone has to take care of him and if I'm there it's too much of a hassle. My day is just going great isn't it?
I tell everyone I don't want a boyfriend. But I really kind of do, someone who loves me unconditionally, and would listen to my problems and take me away. But who wouldn't right? It's just I can never find anyone who can put up with me and my bitch-fits. And I'm encapable of changing myself, it's easier to convince myself that I don't need someone than to change myself for someone to love me.
And the people who do like me or have dumb little crushes on me, don't even really know me. Telling me that they like me may get a bit of my attention, but I seriously won't even give them a time of day. Because that doesn't impress me. Once they get to know me they'll probably stop liking me anyways...
I can't forget about this one guy. Everything happened so long ago... when I say long I meant a couple years back. Everytime when I see him again I feel the same way I did the first time. But nothing will ever happen... because of what I did a long time ago. I'd give anything to change that, but I can't. Life sucks boo hoo, I'm whining like a fucking baby. If you don't like it don't read it.
One last thing...
What do you think of when you look at the person you really like?