sorry for ranting
hmmm almost been a week.... I should really update more! Well... lets think. Ummm... Zac and I are still doing great! He is still planning on comeing up here... although he keeps forgetting to get the tickets... and Im worried that he will postpone it to much and then cancle on me T_T but I shouldnt doubt him! I love him! I cant wait to see him!
We are haveing a few problems though... like... all the guys who want me... and thats pissing him off. He knows I wont cheat on him because he knows I love him and wanna marry him, but just the thought of the other guys all over me pisses him off. Its starting to bug me too... they shouldnt temp me so much... Im sorry but after a while I snap... I love Zac more then anything in the world right now... and I dont wanna lose him! so for anyone who reads this.... DONT TEMPT ME!!!!!.... Im sorry if it sounds harsh and mean.... but I dont want you! I want Zac! Im sorry... just please.... I dont wanna hurt you... but if I cant just be happy with Zac.. then Im going to hurt someone! I dont want anyone tempting me or anything like that! I just want you all as a friend... and if all your going to do is talk to me as if you want me... then I cant be that friend for you anymore... I just want Zac... so please back off! We just wanna be left alone so we can be happy together with out him haveing to worry about some other guys grabbing at me... we just wanna be happy.
I have enough problems as it is with my parents hateing him! They think that he is my #1 and there is nothing else... they think I would drop everything and anything to be with him. Yes to a point I would, but I know thats not what he wants me to do so I wont!
Im still going to try and get a job for the summer to make my parents happy...
Im still going to have my surgery and thats going to be a bitch! but I want it so I have to deal with it and make it work! In the long run it will make me happy! and I will be glad I did it!
And Im still going to College...
So I dont know why the hell my parents think that Zac is taking away everything they have "invested" in me... grrrr they need to let go of me sometime! What are they going to do when I get enggaged? what are they going to do when I get married? what are they going to do when I get pregnant? hell... I might even get pregnant before I get married... what then?? huh?? what will they do? tell me that they have invested so much in me and now its all lost because I gave myself to the one and only man I love? or because I cant work burring the time that Im haveing a kid? Sure I still wanna work after haveing a kid... but I want to be able to raise them too! perhaps after they start school I will start work again... but until then, I dont see myself doing that. And I just know mom and dad will have something to say about that! RawR!!!!! *sighs*
I love Zac! I wanna marry him! I really do! I know it wont happen for a long time down the road because we have to stablize things and figure out a way of life and jobs and place to live and stuff. And it will be hard! But I love him! Im going to do anything and everything to make this work! I know it might be wishfull thinking... and there is always that small chance that it wont work out... but Im not thinking about that... Im just thinking about how much I love him! And how much he makes me happy! I just want to be held in his arms! to snuggle, to kiss him... idk.. you name it. I jsut dont wanna lose him! He is the best thing that has ever happend to me! And I thank God every night that he was brought back into my life after such a long time! Thank you God for giving me such a great boyfriend!
Well... I think Im done ranting now... time to talk to Zac now... since he finaly got back home! *laughs softly* ugg... he is such a dork... but I love him to death! mmmm
We are haveing a few problems though... like... all the guys who want me... and thats pissing him off. He knows I wont cheat on him because he knows I love him and wanna marry him, but just the thought of the other guys all over me pisses him off. Its starting to bug me too... they shouldnt temp me so much... Im sorry but after a while I snap... I love Zac more then anything in the world right now... and I dont wanna lose him! so for anyone who reads this.... DONT TEMPT ME!!!!!.... Im sorry if it sounds harsh and mean.... but I dont want you! I want Zac! Im sorry... just please.... I dont wanna hurt you... but if I cant just be happy with Zac.. then Im going to hurt someone! I dont want anyone tempting me or anything like that! I just want you all as a friend... and if all your going to do is talk to me as if you want me... then I cant be that friend for you anymore... I just want Zac... so please back off! We just wanna be left alone so we can be happy together with out him haveing to worry about some other guys grabbing at me... we just wanna be happy.
I have enough problems as it is with my parents hateing him! They think that he is my #1 and there is nothing else... they think I would drop everything and anything to be with him. Yes to a point I would, but I know thats not what he wants me to do so I wont!
Im still going to try and get a job for the summer to make my parents happy...
Im still going to have my surgery and thats going to be a bitch! but I want it so I have to deal with it and make it work! In the long run it will make me happy! and I will be glad I did it!
And Im still going to College...
So I dont know why the hell my parents think that Zac is taking away everything they have "invested" in me... grrrr they need to let go of me sometime! What are they going to do when I get enggaged? what are they going to do when I get married? what are they going to do when I get pregnant? hell... I might even get pregnant before I get married... what then?? huh?? what will they do? tell me that they have invested so much in me and now its all lost because I gave myself to the one and only man I love? or because I cant work burring the time that Im haveing a kid? Sure I still wanna work after haveing a kid... but I want to be able to raise them too! perhaps after they start school I will start work again... but until then, I dont see myself doing that. And I just know mom and dad will have something to say about that! RawR!!!!! *sighs*
I love Zac! I wanna marry him! I really do! I know it wont happen for a long time down the road because we have to stablize things and figure out a way of life and jobs and place to live and stuff. And it will be hard! But I love him! Im going to do anything and everything to make this work! I know it might be wishfull thinking... and there is always that small chance that it wont work out... but Im not thinking about that... Im just thinking about how much I love him! And how much he makes me happy! I just want to be held in his arms! to snuggle, to kiss him... idk.. you name it. I jsut dont wanna lose him! He is the best thing that has ever happend to me! And I thank God every night that he was brought back into my life after such a long time! Thank you God for giving me such a great boyfriend!
Well... I think Im done ranting now... time to talk to Zac now... since he finaly got back home! *laughs softly* ugg... he is such a dork... but I love him to death! mmmm