Worry, Hate, (yes I think I mean it) and Hope
Worry.
I had to rush my Dad to the hospital late Friday night, he was having chest pain. Needless to say I was freaking out, especially knowing the family history. His parents died in their 60's due to heart disease, his brother died in his early 50's. Dad is now 55, I honestly don't think I have ever been so scared. They kept him overnight for observation, just incase, but I was able to bring him home this morning. The Dr's think the pain and pressure were a rare side-effect to his high cholesterol meds.
Hate.
As I was quickly getting dressed to bring him to the ER, he went into the bedroom to tell my mother. (When they are both home at night, he sleeps on the couch) He then tells me she isn't coming with us and we get in the car and leave. This does not occur at all strange to me until I am alone in the waiting room. How dare she not come with us? Now I know that they are less than thrilled with each other and that divorce is going to happen eventually, but COME ON NOW! He is still her husband and they've been married for over 20 years, any normal human being would show enough compassion to at least muster up some fake concern! Nope! I was brought in to see him when they decided to admit him. When the wheeled him up to ICU, the nurse asked me to wait in the waiting room until they got him settled, luckily, as I was walking in, I saw John's mom who was on-call that night. She was able to sit with me for a bit and give me the support that my mother should have. I was able to then call John and leave him a message, and then go in to see Dad. After he was settled in and the Dr's had decided a plan of action, he made me go home to get some rest. I walked in the door, my mother was still sleeping. I honestly wanted to beat the hell out of her! An hour later, I heard her walking around in the livingroom and Dad's alarm went off. I got up to turn it off and I swear to God, she looked right at me and said, "Where is your father?". YUP, that's what she said. By this time I was exhausted, worried, and really angry at her so I said, "At the hospital, you moron!". She looks at me and again, I couldn't make this shit up, she says, "Why?" WHY? WHY? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! So at this point, the small amout of self-control, respect, and care for my mother I had left, have now been completely destroyed. And I start screaming at her. I think I called her everything under the sun, and then some. She says to me that she thought that my Dad had said that his shoulder was bothering him. I finally managed to scream that, no, like he told you, I had brought him to the hospital, "FOR HIS CHEST, YOU IDIOT!" At this point I was honestly afraid that I was going to black out I was so mad, that I just walked away and went into my room. I couldn't understand or believe that she was that stupid! I sat in my room in shock until John came home. He sat with me while I told him what had happened, he couldn't believe it either. We tried to figure out how on earth my mother would misunderstand my dad telling her he was having chest pains for something wrong with his shoulder. . . we couldn't come up with anything. Later in the day, after bringing her to the hospital to see him, I asked him about it. I wanted to make sure I wasn't blowing it out of the water, although, I admit, it was a bit too late for that. He said that he woke her up and told her that he was going to have me bring him to the ER because he felt like his chest was really tight, and asked if she wanted to go. He said that she then said no, it was okay and she rolled over to go back to sleep. Okay, so now I'm thinking, "holy crap, I don't have to apologize, she was really that insensitive and stupid!" She swore up and down to me when I got home for the night that Dad didn't say anything about his chest, and basically tried to say that he was lying and that had he said something, she would have gone. I'm sorry, I don't think in any way that my Dad would lie about this! In my own opinion, she flat out didn't care and didn't want to be bothered with him! She is a cruel and heartless BITCH and I would be happy to never speak to her again. . . BUT I live with her. I am so over her. I honestly WANT my parents to get a divorce, I am an adult and I can finally see how she treats my Dad and I hate her for that. I think that at this point, she is just out for any money she can get from him, between her changing banks and trying to hide money, to not paying bills she said she's paid, to trying to make my Dad pay for her surgery and whining that she doesn't have any money. . . I'm done. Hopefully, once the divorce is under way, Dad, myself and John plan on getting a place together, at least then I know that he's okay. She'll qualify for assisted living and can get her claws out of my Dad, forever. For God's sake, my sister came to the hospital even though we knew at that point, everything was okay, he just couldn't be discharged until the Dr checked him in the AM!!!!
Hope.
My Dad is okay, that is the most important part of this whole story. I still have my Daddy, and I am still his little girl.