Life & Times
My friend Ares sent me this, and I had to think how true this often is. So, I share...
Barbecue Season
After 4 long months of cold and winter, we are finally coming up to summer and BBQ season.
Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime, outdoor cooking as it's the only type of cooking a 'real man' will do.
Probably because there is an element of danger involved...When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:
Routine:
1) The woman buys the food.
2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beverage in hand.
Here comes the important part:
4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
More routine....
5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beverage while he deals with the situation.
Important again...
7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
More routine .
8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces and brings them to the table.
9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all:
10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
11) The man then asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her slightly annoyed, or lack of reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.
Made me laugh anyway.
So, I spent three hours in 'the Chair' Monday. I hate going to the dentist. I think most of dentistry comes from various torture techniques and implements throughout the ages.
There are needles. There are the bright lights that near to blind a person. Then you have the lovely tray of shiny, painful looking instruments. And the needles. The masked people standing around and making hmmm-ing noises at you, but not telling you what they are hmmm-ing about. The needles. And the noises. Holy Hannah, the freaking horrible noises of the 'scraper' and the drill and the suction thingy. And then- after three hours of this, half a face fulll of novacaine and the prep work for two crowns- they give you the bill and you wonder if that tight, breathless feeling in your chest is a heart attack.
It's just badness.
On a positive note, we had the year end conference with Dear Boy's school. They re-did all his testing this year: behavioral assessment, Wechsler intelligence scale, speech/language eval, academic achievement testing, classroom/curriculum assessment and Woodcock Johnson test of achievement. It hadn't been done since the tests they did when he was in preschool. The tests, for the most part, didn't turn out any differently than I thought they would. For his age and grade he scored below average or low average on most everything, especially things involving abstract thinking. Math, he scored high average.
And now I get to gush.
The amazing thing, though, was when they explained the Block Design and Matrix Reasoning portions of the tests. In Block Design you are given various blocks (with dots, lines and colors on the different faces) in a jumble and you have to recreate a picture. The pictures go from very easy to extremely difficult, even for an adult. The scores are based on speed and correctness of the finished design. He rated in the superior range.
Matrix Reasoning, as described to me by the psychology specialist, is the ability to see patterns or codes and correctly complete the pattern or code. Again the patterns go from very easy to extremely difficult. Dear Boy scored completely off the chart. The pschologist said he barely had to look at a pattern to complete it, he never had to go back to correct anything because he always got them right on the first try and he didn't even pause between patterns- his hands were constantly moving and he was completely sure of himself. She said that in her two decades of doing this she'd never seen anything like it.
His IEP was changed- things he had mastered were dropped or modified and new things were added. I learned which school he will be going to next year. Because of the lack of classrooms, every two years Dear Boy will be going to a new school. This means a new transfer bus, new teacher and some new classmates. We'll be doing prep work with him all summer so he doesn't have a meltdown with all the new changes.
Dear Boy had his first day of horseback riding this year. He's really bad with names and can't remember the name of his horse but he had lots of fun.
Mom, the rat, has been in Vegas since the 17th. They invited us to go with, but the boys have school and Hubby had work and there were MD appointments all around. Hubby has never gone and really, really wants to. One day we will. For now, it's Devil's Den for Memorial Day. And won't it be fun digging the camping gear out of the shed?
And now I've got to go get all caught up on everyone else's lives. :~)
Barbecue Season
After 4 long months of cold and winter, we are finally coming up to summer and BBQ season.
Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime, outdoor cooking as it's the only type of cooking a 'real man' will do.
Probably because there is an element of danger involved...When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:
Routine:
1) The woman buys the food.
2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beverage in hand.
Here comes the important part:
4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
More routine....
5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beverage while he deals with the situation.
Important again...
7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
More routine .
8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces and brings them to the table.
9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all:
10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
11) The man then asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her slightly annoyed, or lack of reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.
Made me laugh anyway.
So, I spent three hours in 'the Chair' Monday. I hate going to the dentist. I think most of dentistry comes from various torture techniques and implements throughout the ages.
There are needles. There are the bright lights that near to blind a person. Then you have the lovely tray of shiny, painful looking instruments. And the needles. The masked people standing around and making hmmm-ing noises at you, but not telling you what they are hmmm-ing about. The needles. And the noises. Holy Hannah, the freaking horrible noises of the 'scraper' and the drill and the suction thingy. And then- after three hours of this, half a face fulll of novacaine and the prep work for two crowns- they give you the bill and you wonder if that tight, breathless feeling in your chest is a heart attack.
It's just badness.
On a positive note, we had the year end conference with Dear Boy's school. They re-did all his testing this year: behavioral assessment, Wechsler intelligence scale, speech/language eval, academic achievement testing, classroom/curriculum assessment and Woodcock Johnson test of achievement. It hadn't been done since the tests they did when he was in preschool. The tests, for the most part, didn't turn out any differently than I thought they would. For his age and grade he scored below average or low average on most everything, especially things involving abstract thinking. Math, he scored high average.
And now I get to gush.
The amazing thing, though, was when they explained the Block Design and Matrix Reasoning portions of the tests. In Block Design you are given various blocks (with dots, lines and colors on the different faces) in a jumble and you have to recreate a picture. The pictures go from very easy to extremely difficult, even for an adult. The scores are based on speed and correctness of the finished design. He rated in the superior range.
Matrix Reasoning, as described to me by the psychology specialist, is the ability to see patterns or codes and correctly complete the pattern or code. Again the patterns go from very easy to extremely difficult. Dear Boy scored completely off the chart. The pschologist said he barely had to look at a pattern to complete it, he never had to go back to correct anything because he always got them right on the first try and he didn't even pause between patterns- his hands were constantly moving and he was completely sure of himself. She said that in her two decades of doing this she'd never seen anything like it.
His IEP was changed- things he had mastered were dropped or modified and new things were added. I learned which school he will be going to next year. Because of the lack of classrooms, every two years Dear Boy will be going to a new school. This means a new transfer bus, new teacher and some new classmates. We'll be doing prep work with him all summer so he doesn't have a meltdown with all the new changes.
Dear Boy had his first day of horseback riding this year. He's really bad with names and can't remember the name of his horse but he had lots of fun.
Mom, the rat, has been in Vegas since the 17th. They invited us to go with, but the boys have school and Hubby had work and there were MD appointments all around. Hubby has never gone and really, really wants to. One day we will. For now, it's Devil's Den for Memorial Day. And won't it be fun digging the camping gear out of the shed?
And now I've got to go get all caught up on everyone else's lives. :~)