(no subject)
i feel so incredably shitty right now. i had a horrible day. woke up, read some messages from last night, which confused me and made me sad. Then i went to church. Came home did homework, went back to the CCD building to sing a song for some show i have to perform it. Came home did homework had some stupid BBQ. honestly who does that in the middle of autumn? I tried to help people with their problems. Kait was upset so me and tim tried calling her like so many times, i eventually got through, she didn't really want to talk, so i felt bad for not being able to help. Then i coudln't help tim, buti tried really hard. I seriously only want for him to be happy. And i don't get why this girl doesn't liek him. I'd give anything to get my 4th? chance now is it? yeah and she doesn't realize what an amazing kid he is. It just upsets me. And i guess i'm just like ridiculously jealous...Still wishing that things were how they were 2 months ago. But i really hope him and her get together...it'd be nice for him to be happy.
And when i was working on my healt project today, i was thinking about so much because i was going through pics and i have pics of me and tom singing together and it just makes me so mad i miss him so much. Then i thought of him today when i was crying because i'm jealous and feel useless...but i remember one time i was crying, so he came up to my room and started singing one of my favorite songs? honestly could you get a better brother? someone to come up to your fucking room and fucking sing to you just so you would feel better? I miss him so much....i wish he didn't go. The only things i'm looking forward to right now, is next weekend because hes coming back up and i get to see him finally. I wish he wasn't so far away...but oh well its just my luck, i hope hes happy though.
I miss the way things were. tom home...me and tim together..me and caitie friends?
i was thinking about her today too, i really do hope things get better at sterling, thats the only other thing i look forward to...snowboarding.
alright sorry about that entry its just how i feel and i needed to get it out
its not supposed to be a guilt trip don't feel sorry for me
What did i do wrong?
I'll take it back
And start over again
I'll sleep to dream of you
And i'll wake up, alone and unwanted
And i wish i could destroy you
But instead i just adore you
I'll cross my fingers tight
And sleep to dream of you
Cause' when i wake
I know i'll be alone
But its worth it for you
And when i was working on my healt project today, i was thinking about so much because i was going through pics and i have pics of me and tom singing together and it just makes me so mad i miss him so much. Then i thought of him today when i was crying because i'm jealous and feel useless...but i remember one time i was crying, so he came up to my room and started singing one of my favorite songs? honestly could you get a better brother? someone to come up to your fucking room and fucking sing to you just so you would feel better? I miss him so much....i wish he didn't go. The only things i'm looking forward to right now, is next weekend because hes coming back up and i get to see him finally. I wish he wasn't so far away...but oh well its just my luck, i hope hes happy though.
I miss the way things were. tom home...me and tim together..me and caitie friends?
i was thinking about her today too, i really do hope things get better at sterling, thats the only other thing i look forward to...snowboarding.
alright sorry about that entry its just how i feel and i needed to get it out
its not supposed to be a guilt trip don't feel sorry for me
What did i do wrong?
I'll take it back
And start over again
I'll sleep to dream of you
And i'll wake up, alone and unwanted
And i wish i could destroy you
But instead i just adore you
I'll cross my fingers tight
And sleep to dream of you
Cause' when i wake
I know i'll be alone
But its worth it for you