yesterday
Yesterday was the best day that I've had at school to date!
-I received an A on a poetry exam. It was a very difficult exam and I had worked really hard on it. He gave 3 A's and I was one of them!!
-(not yesterday, but Wednesday)I found out that I tied for the highest grade on my music history exam. It was a killer fucking test, but I had studied my fucking ass off and knew gregorian chant like the back of my hand, but hadn't thought that I had done as well as I did.
-What all this means is my grades in all of my classes currently are A's!!!!! I HAVE ALL A'S!!!! That is a first in my entire life, and I for the first time also feel as though I am ready for grad school. A dear friend of mine said last night that everything happens exactly when we're ready, and if we try sooner we have a higher chance of failure. She is so right. Perhaps it is just my time. My self-esteem is growing regarding my intelligence. I have never felt smart. Clever sometimes, but not SMART. You know?
-Right after poetry, during my elation, I ran into a fellow that I hadn't seen in 4 years. His name is Conrad Stininsky. He went to 2nd pres with me and he has always reminded me soooo much of my father. And when I saw him in the crosswalk, I dropped my backpack and gave him the biggest hug!!! He visited with me for an hour and it was just like my dad had come to affirm me for the effort I was making in school. It felt JUST LIKE THAT. I know that it was dad, and I know that it was a gift from God. I cried for a really long time after that, and grieved the loss of my daddy, and haven't felt that grateful in a while. *wipes eyes AGAIN*
-Then I went to LR and went to the mall. I had put on my favorite pair of slacks (the olive ones with the drawstring front) and they were just officially too big. They looked really terrible and even cinching them in the front, they bagged and hung on my ass and thighs. So, I walked into Lane Bryant and 2 hours later walked out the proud owner of jeans, size 22, compared to my slacks, size 28. I'm feeling very very good about that. And my friend Brenda said that they were good butt jeans!!! YES!!! I need a good butt pair of jeans!
-THEN I met up with 2 of our dearest friends T and T. We visited for a very very long time and to celebrate my blessings of the day, they bought me beer (new favorite beer - Amber Bock) and a Muffelletta at this place that I had never been called Gradys. Their company was like nourishment. They inspire me. They love me. They move me. And they just really really care, and it shows, and that means more than surely they know - I hope that my (our) simple adoration for them shows, too. I think that I am going to get to hang with them next Thursday night and watch Survivor!!!!!!! I love that show and miss watching it with my darling Owl...
And best of all, today I get to go home. I will get to see my darling boys and my wonderful, tangible God-part here on Earth - she is my soul piece and I can't wait to meet eyes with her and feel that wonderful warmth that is always certain whenever she is near.
My boys and I are going to decorate the windows for Halloween this weekend, I think!
Sorry for the length, and sorry I hadn't posted sooner. I love y'all.
-I received an A on a poetry exam. It was a very difficult exam and I had worked really hard on it. He gave 3 A's and I was one of them!!
-(not yesterday, but Wednesday)I found out that I tied for the highest grade on my music history exam. It was a killer fucking test, but I had studied my fucking ass off and knew gregorian chant like the back of my hand, but hadn't thought that I had done as well as I did.
-What all this means is my grades in all of my classes currently are A's!!!!! I HAVE ALL A'S!!!! That is a first in my entire life, and I for the first time also feel as though I am ready for grad school. A dear friend of mine said last night that everything happens exactly when we're ready, and if we try sooner we have a higher chance of failure. She is so right. Perhaps it is just my time. My self-esteem is growing regarding my intelligence. I have never felt smart. Clever sometimes, but not SMART. You know?
-Right after poetry, during my elation, I ran into a fellow that I hadn't seen in 4 years. His name is Conrad Stininsky. He went to 2nd pres with me and he has always reminded me soooo much of my father. And when I saw him in the crosswalk, I dropped my backpack and gave him the biggest hug!!! He visited with me for an hour and it was just like my dad had come to affirm me for the effort I was making in school. It felt JUST LIKE THAT. I know that it was dad, and I know that it was a gift from God. I cried for a really long time after that, and grieved the loss of my daddy, and haven't felt that grateful in a while. *wipes eyes AGAIN*
-Then I went to LR and went to the mall. I had put on my favorite pair of slacks (the olive ones with the drawstring front) and they were just officially too big. They looked really terrible and even cinching them in the front, they bagged and hung on my ass and thighs. So, I walked into Lane Bryant and 2 hours later walked out the proud owner of jeans, size 22, compared to my slacks, size 28. I'm feeling very very good about that. And my friend Brenda said that they were good butt jeans!!! YES!!! I need a good butt pair of jeans!
-THEN I met up with 2 of our dearest friends T and T. We visited for a very very long time and to celebrate my blessings of the day, they bought me beer (new favorite beer - Amber Bock) and a Muffelletta at this place that I had never been called Gradys. Their company was like nourishment. They inspire me. They love me. They move me. And they just really really care, and it shows, and that means more than surely they know - I hope that my (our) simple adoration for them shows, too. I think that I am going to get to hang with them next Thursday night and watch Survivor!!!!!!! I love that show and miss watching it with my darling Owl...
And best of all, today I get to go home. I will get to see my darling boys and my wonderful, tangible God-part here on Earth - she is my soul piece and I can't wait to meet eyes with her and feel that wonderful warmth that is always certain whenever she is near.
My boys and I are going to decorate the windows for Halloween this weekend, I think!
Sorry for the length, and sorry I hadn't posted sooner. I love y'all.