Daylight's Burnin'
Title: Daylight's Burnin'
Pairing/Character: Logan/Remy, Jubilee
Rating: PG-13
Fandom: X-Men
Words: ~4000
Summary: A family camping trip.
"Well, which do you prefer: snoring or bears?" Logan asked.
"You said there weren't any bears!"
Notes: Written in the same general verse as Does a Mall Babe Eat Chili Fries?, which I guess I'm gonna go ahead and call Adopted Dad Logan 'verse.
"Remy, how is this supposed to work?" Jubilee whined as she fidgeted with a long, flexible pole.
"Hell if I know," Remy muttered. Across the campsite, Logan had already assembled the larger of the two tents. He was sitting at a wooden picnic table and smirking at them. Remy hated looking like a fool, but it wasn't like he'd ever put up a tent before. It had been Logan's brilliant idea to go away for the weekend and see "nature." It was like he didn't know that the mansion got several cable channels dedicated to nature. Remy straightened his shoulders. "C'mon, cherie, can't be that hard if Logan can do it."
Jubilee grinned at that and said, "And there are only like four pieces."
Remy shook out the big piece of nylon and examined it closely. "Looks like the poles are supposed to go in here."
"In these little sleeves? I mean, I guess, where else would they go, right?" Jubilee threaded a pole into the opposite end of the tent and worked it across. Remy took it once it reached the middle of the tent and inched it toward him.
"Daylight's burnin'," Logan said. God, he could be an asshole. Remy ignored him and snapped the pole into place.
"Looks good, cher, now we just have to do the other one," Remy said brightly. It slid into place a bit faster, now that the first pole was providing some tension to the fabric. Once it was snapped into place, the tent looked very tent-like.
"That wasn't so hard!" Jubilee said. "But what are we supposed to do with these extra pieces?"
Remy shrugged, and Logan spoke up. "That's the rain fly. Nice to have. If it rains."
Jubilee glanced up at the sky, then down at the smaller piece of nylon cloth. "Where's it go? Just over the other piece of tent?"
"Yup," Logan said. He lit a cigar and smiled.
"Lo-gan," Jubilee whined, but he just shook his head.
"Look, darlin', this stuff's important. You'll learn better if you figure it out yourself than if I just tell you."
"When am I ever going to pitch a tent again?"
"Best to be prepared. Anyway, hurry up with the tent, because the next lesson is that y'only get to eat what y'can cook." Jubilee briefly closed her eyes so Logan wouldn't see her rolling them, and he added, "By the way, I took the candy bars out of your backpack back when we stopped for gas."
Jubilee swore in Chinese, then added, "Come on, I was just following the Girl Scout motto. Be prepared."
"Be prepared to have wildlife in your tent, more like."
"Wildlife? Like bears?"
"No," Logan said, breathing out a puff of smoke. "There's no bears here. Well, not usually, anyway."
"Come on, cherie, let's finish this tent," Remy called.
"You're lucky, Remy, Logan put together your tent."
"Oui, I'm a lucky man," Remy agreed. "On the other hand, Logan snores something awful."
Jubilee laughed, a little, as she fidgeted with a smaller pole. She managed to wedge it into a small joint in the front of the tent frame, and triumphantly pulled the fly over the tent and attached it to the new bar. She stood back and admired her work. Remy stood next to her and frowned. It didn't look quite right, somehow, and Logan's snicker confirmed that something was wrong.
"Close, darlin," he said. "But think about it. The point of the rain fly is to have something that will shed rain water away from your tent."
Jubilee swore again. "This little bar thing is upside down, isn't it?"
"But aren't you glad you found out now, instead of in the middle of a rainstorm?"
Jubilee muttered, "I wish you guys were teaching me how to book a hotel room."
"You know, that is an important skill," Remy mused, reflecting on several of his own hotel booking missteps.
"Maybe next spring break," Logan said.
"Maybe Christmas break, so you don't get some kinda fool idea like ice fishing in your head," Remy said.
"Ice fishing?" Jubilee squeaked, looking up from the tent frame. "Is that a thing?"
"Unfortunately," Remy said, helping her pull the rain fly tight.
"There," Jubilee said. "That's it, right? Right?"
"Just about," Logan said. "Tell me, though, what happens if it gets real windy?"
Jubilee bit her lip and peered into the tent bag. She fished out a handful of yellow plastic pegs. "You know, you don't have to tie a hotel room to the ground to keep it from flying away," she said.
"Well, a hotel room don't have a view like this, now, does it?" Logan asked, indicating the forest around them.
"Yeah, because nobody would be dumb enough to build a hotel in the middle of the woods," Jubilee said, viciously shoving the pegs into the sandy campsite.
"Look on the bright side, Jubilee," Remy said. "Least we're at a campground with real toilets. Logan wanted to take us out into the backwoods somewhere. Somewhere we'd have to dig holes."
"Ew," Jubilee said. "Okay, Wolvie, is it done? Or did we forget to dig the moat around it? Or the bear trap? Are we supposed to set up one of those?"
Logan quirked his lips. "I think that'll do it, darlin'. You can set up your sleeping bag and stuff and then we'll start dinner."
"What's for dinner?" Remy asked.
"Whatever Jubilee makes us."
Remy narrowed his eyes. "And you already threw away the candy bars?"
"Yup."
Remy let out a long breath. At times like this, he knew it was no good to think about all the other lovers he could have chosen. Remy liked to go out to eat, to restaurants where the waiters had to be nice to you even if you showed up with, well, Logan. But, he reminded himself, it was only two nights, and he'd endured much worse.
Jubilee climbed back out of her tent and said, "Okay, Iron Chef, what's next?"
"You know how to start a fire?" Logan asked.
Jubilee extended a hand and shot off a small glimmer of fireworks.
"Okay, and how are you gonna cook with that?" Logan said.
Jubilee shrugged, and Logan said, "Okay, then, c'mere."
Jubilee crouched next to Logan and frowned into the firepit. Logan said, "I already split some wood. Can you get a fire going?"
Remy perched on the picnic table to watch what he was sure would be an entertaining show. Jubilee haphazardly dumped some chunks of wood into the pit and tried to light them, to no avail. He lit a cigarette and watched as Jubilee grew increasingly frustrated. Logan remained serene, but eventually stepped in and showed Jubilee how to arrange the wood in a square pattern, with small pieces of tinder in the center. With the wood properly arranged, Jubilee's paf started a decent fire.
"All right," Logan said, "What are we going to eat?"
Jubilee blew her bangs out of her face and said, "You packed the coolers."
"Yup. So, what are we going to eat?"
Remy would swear that Jubilee audibly rolled her eyes as she rolled to her feet and examined the contents of the cooler. "Ew. Raw meat," she observed. "And beer."
"Well," Logan said. "You got meat. You got a fire. What are you going to do with it?"
"Put it on a stick?"
"Ain't hot dogs, Jubilee. Hand me a beer, will ya?"
"Can I have one?"
"Suit yourself," Logan replied. She fished three beers out of the cooler and passed one to Remy, who happily accepted. He realized that Logan would quickly heal from food poisoning and mentally cursed. But he saw how much Logan was enjoying this and managed to keep his mouth shut (for once in his life). Instead, he drank his beer and reached in his pocket for a deck of cards to fidget with while he watched Logan show Jubilee how to wrap the meat in foil with some vegetables and cook it directly in the camp fire.
"Mm. Put the meat there, the outside's gonna burn black and the inside'll be cold," he said. "You want to find a nice spot of coals."
"Coal?" Jubilee asked.
"Coals," Logan said patiently. He pointed out a glowing white-hot spot and Jubilee hesitantly dropped the foil packet down.
"How do you know when it's done?" she asked.
Logan shrugged. "You check it."
"How long is this gonna take? I'm starving."
"Check it in maybe ten minutes, Jubes."
Jubilee let out a huge sigh and sat down next to Remy. She couldn't quite keep a grimace off her face as she sipped her Heineken, but she didn't say a word about it.
"Hey, petite, pick a card," he said. She rolled her eyes but obliged him. She pretended not to be impressed when he successfully pulled her card out through one of her enormous hoop earrings, but he could tell that she had enjoyed it. Before long, Logan prompted Jubilee to check the meat. To everyone's surprise, except perhaps Logan's, it was done and appeared edible.
"It's good!" Jubilee said after her first bite. "Who knew?"
"It ain't bad," Logan agreed, shaking more salt onto his plate.
"Real good, especially for your first try," Remy added.
"And, hey, no dishes to wash!" Jubilee chirped. "Just foil. Well, and the forks, I guess."
"Yup," Logan said.
After the three of them had licked their forks clean, Jubilee said, "I seriously hope there's s'mores for dessert. That's what you're supposed to do when you camp."
"What do you know about what you're supposed to do when you camp?" Logan grumbled, but then he added, "Look in the other cooler."
Jubilee switched on her flashlight and investigated. She came back to the picnic table beaming, carrying slightly damp chocolate bars, marshmallows, and graham crackers.
"You're the best, Logan!"
"Yeah, yeah," Logan said, but he managed a small smile as Jubilee happily stabbed a couple marshmallows onto a stick. The smile turned into a throaty laugh when she promptly set them on fire and shrieked. Then she blew out the flames and experimentally ate one.
"Hey. They're not bad like this," she said.
"You ain't never had a burnt marshmallow before?" Logan asked.
Jubilee shrugged. "Well, my parents weren't really into camping, and after they died... " she trailed off and popped the other blackened marshmallow in her mouth.
Remy glanced sideway at Logan, whose mouth tightened slightly before he said, "If you wanna roast it brown, you should hold it over the coals, not the flame."
"Who knew coals were so important?" Jubilee mused, before putting two new marshmallows on the stick and gamely following Logan's advice.
Remy happily accepted the s'more Jubilee made for him. He caught Logan staring when he licked his fingers clean, and Remy smirked. Logan sent Jubilee down to the communal pump to wash the silverware. She went, only grumbling a little bit, and Logan leaned over and kissed Remy.
"Mmm," Remy purred when they finally broke apart. "Real nice, cher. Y'taste like marshmallows."
"Mm. You, too," Logan growled, before leaning in again. Remy was more or less on Logan's lap when Jubilee came back and shone a flashlight on them.
"Aw, Jesus," Jubilee said. "Get a room. I mean a tent."
Remy batted his eyelashes. Logan said, "We'll put the fire out. Why don't you get settled in for bed, darlin'?"
"What? It's like, eight o'clock."
"So read a book."
Remy very much doubted that Jubilee had packed a book, but he also doubted that she wanted to sit around and watch him make out with Logan. She huffed, "Fine. Good night."
"Bonsoir, cherie!"
"Night, Jubes. Don't let the bedbugs bite."
"Eew." Jubilee stalked off and zipped her tent shut. Remy grinned at Logan and headed for their tent. Logan splashed some water on the last glowing embers of the campfire, then followed Remy in and zipped the tent up forcefully behind them.
They undressed hastily. Remy said, "Dieu, it got cold."
Logan laughed roughly. "Better warm you up, then." He pushed Remy down onto one of the sleeping bags and nipped at Remy's throat. Remy arched his back and pressed himself against Logan. Logan hungrily made his way down Remy's body and took his cock into his mouth.
Remy moaned loudly. He hoped Jubilee had brought her iPod. She probably had. Before long, Logan made Remy forget his concern about noise. Remy had always been, as they say, a screamer.
"Still cold?" Logan asked, after Remy had his very audible orgasm.
"Can't say that I am," Remy purred. He reached out a hand and caressed Logan's back gratefully. "How about you, Logan? How you feel?"
Logan kissed Remy hard before murmuring, "I think you can guess."
Remy winked. "Oh, mm-hmm. I'm a real good guesser." He teased Logan with his mouth before taking his lover's thick cock into his mouth. Logan took his sweet time about it, and Remy's jaw ached by the time Logan finished.
Remy got a pleased "Mm" in response to what he knew was an epic blow job. He knew it was high praise from Logan, though he still preferred it when he could elicit more of a verbal response from his lover. He snaked his way back up Logan's body and curled against him. Logan tightened an arm around him for a moment and said, "Let's get under the sleeping bag. Don't want you to freeze, darlin."
"So thoughtful," Remy murmured.
Logan snorted. "You're no good to me if your lips turn blue."
"Hmph," Remy said. Logan's broad hand gently traced circles on Remy's back, and Remy quickly dozed off under the warm down sleeping bag.
He and Logan both scrambled awake to the sound of Jubilee's cry. Logan threw open the tent's zipper and ran out into the campsite. "Jubilee? You okay?"
"I just heard--I heard a bear, I swear."
Remy poked his head out of the tent and saw Jubilee looking sheepish and scared. He knew what she meant--it was too quiet out here, and the sound of every snapping twig was magnified. He'd be a little nervous about bears himself if he weren't sharing a sleeping bag with Wolverine. If it came down to it, Remy was pretty sure he could fight off a bear, but it was not his area of expertise.
Logan sighed. "Jubilee, I told you, there are no bears here."
Jubilee sounded slightly calmer when she said, "Oh my God, are you naked?"
"I thought you were being attacked. You wanted me to stop and put some pants on if you were in danger?"
"Oh. Um. I guess not. Um. Thanks," Jubilee muttered, her eyes and flashlight pointed at the ground.
"Probably heard, I dunno, a deer. Or another camper. No bears here, I promise," Logan said. "I'd smell 'em."
Jubilee took a deep breath. "Okay. Yeah. I'm sure it was nothing," she said bravely.
"Good night, darlin'," Logan said.
"Night," Jubilee whispered, slinking back across the campsite to her tent.
Logan climbed back into the tent. Remy curled against him. "So brave, mon coeur. Ready to take on a bear."
Logan snorted. "Yeah. Hell, I'll take on a hundred imaginary bears." Logan was breathing a little harder than usual from the adrenaline. Remy could make out the look on Logan's face in the dark, and he liked what he saw. And he'd be lying if he said he wasn't turned on by the image of a nude Logan running off into the woods to fight a bear. Logan let out a low growl and pressed himself against Remy. They both managed another noisy set of orgasms before returning to sleep, only to be again awoken by Jubilee outside their tent.
"Um. Guys. Are you awake?" she whispered loudly.
"What's wrong, Jubilee?" Logan said.
She took a deep breath. "Um, it'sjustcanIsleepwithyouguysplease?"
Remy bit back a laugh. "Sure, cherie," he said. "Just, ah, give us a moment."
Jubilee let out a strangled, frustrated sound. "Fine," she said. "I'm... I'm gonna go get my sleeping bag."
Remy groped around the tent, sleepily searching for his boxers. He squirmed into them. Logan watched mournfully before getting dressed himself.
"You packed coffee, right, cher?" Remy asked.
"Course," Logan said. "Instant."
Remy made a face but kept quiet, knowing it was better than nothing.
"Um, are you guys, you know, decent?" Jubilee called softly.
"Come in, cherie," Remy said.
"Thanks," she muttered. She set down her sleeping bag and nestled into it. "There's just, um. There's just a lot of stuff out here."
"I hear you," Remy said.
Logan chuckled. "The most dangerous thing in these woods is right here in this tent."
"Yeah, yeah, you're soo tough," Jubilee said.
"Ah, girl, I meant you," Logan said. "Teenage girl full of hormones and fireworks."
"Whatever," Jubilee said, but Remy could hear a smile in her voice.
"Good night, Jubes," Remy said.
"Night," she replied, and before long Remy heard her peaceful, even breathing. He smiled and drifted off to sleep himself. He woke up again to a hushed conversation between Logan and Jubilee.
"Kid, you can't just poke me when I'm sleeping," Logan chided.
"Sorry, Logan, it's just, um, you were snoring. Really loud."
Remy bit his lip. "I did warn you about that," he said. "You get used to it after awhile."
"Well, which do you prefer: snoring or bears?" Logan asked.
"You said there weren't any bears!"
"There aren't," Logan said, "Except in your head."
Jubilee considered before saying. "I... I'll still take your snoring over, you know, the other sounds. I guess."
"All right. Then let me get some goddamn sleep, Jubilee," Logan said.
"Sorry," Jubilee muttered. She was right, though. Logan did snore, although Remy could sleep through pretty much everything. Everything except freezing to death.
He woke up with his teeth chattering and pressed against Logan, trying to climb into his lover's skin.
"So cold," he said. He could see his breath.
Logan chuckled. "Tends to get a bit chilly before the sun comes up, yeah."
"This is awful. Why would anyone get up at this hour?" Remy said.
Logan obligingly rubbed his hands over Remy, warming him slightly. It was no use, though. Remy was sure it had to be below zero. Before long, though, Logan was climbing out of the sleeping bag.
"Noo," Remy whined. "I'll freeze to death."
"No, you won't," Logan said. He threw a backpack at Remy. "I'm gonna go start a fire. That'll warm you up."
Remy blinked. Logan was getting up now? The sky was a pale grey. It was not time to be awake.
Logan said, "Daylight's burnin'. Get dressed. You'll warm up."
Sighing, Remy pulled on every layer of clothing he had packed. Jubilee woke up, black hair sticking out in all directions, and whined, "It's freezing!"
"Believe me, I know," Remy said. "Logan's starting a fire."
Jubilee pulled jeans and a sweatshirt over her pajamas. She snuggled up against Remy on the picnic table by the fire pit, and he tucked her in under his leather coat.
Logan smiled at them indulgently and put some water on the fire to boil, and the three of them drank more than their fair share of instant coffee.
"Can we have s'mores for breakfast?" Jubilee asked.
Logan shrugged. "I don't see why not."
Jubilee grinned. "Camping is awesome."
Remy returned her grin over his mug of terrible coffee. "It ain't bad," he agreed. The fire and the increasing sunlight had warmed him up some, and his mood had improved considerably.
Logan shook his head. "It's certainly a lot more exciting with you two around."
"Duh," Jubilee said.
Then the trio looked up from their sugary breakfast at the sound of an approaching golf cart. A cheery park ranger said, "Good morning! How are you folks doing today?"
"Just fine, and yourself?" Remy said, before Logan could reply.
"Well, I'm fine!" the ranger chirped. "But I just wanted to swing by because we had some reports of strange noises last night. Any of you folks hear anything?"
"Strange noises?" Remy asked politely.
The ranger nodded. "Well, screaming. We had reports of men screaming."
"That was me," Jubilee blurted. The ranger raised an eyebrow and Jubilee said, "I thought I heard a bear, and, I've never been camping before, and, um, it was me." She chewed on a lock of hair before adding, "I guess I have a deep voice when I scream or something."
"I see," the ranger said. "Well, I hope everyone's all right?"
"Oh, yeah, we're fine. We're great," Jubilee said, smiling sweetly. "But thanks for checking!"
"Yes. Of course. Well... just so you know, these woods are not known to be a habitat for bears. But please don't hesitate to stop by the ranger station if there are any problems. And, ah, if there aren't any problems, please do remember that there is a noise ordinance... we keep quiet hours here between 10pm and 6am." She glanced sideways at Logan and Remy before brightening her smile and adding, "Have a wonderful stay here!"
"Oh, we will," Jubilee said. After the ranger sped off in her golf cart, Jubilee flashed a huge grin at Remy and Logan. "You guys so owe me."
Remy shrugged. "We saved you from a bear last night. I figure we're even."
"That wasn't you, that was Logan."
"I would have backed him up, though," Remy said indignantly.
"There are no goddamn bears here," Logan said.
"Just a couple of dudes who can't keep their mouths shut when they... you know," Jubilee said, sounding both amused and horrified.
Remy smiled down at her over his mug. Logan cleared his throat and said, "Let's get breakfast cleaned up so we can start our hike. Daylight's burnin'."
Jubilee said, "Stop saying that! Of course it's burning! That's what the sun does! Ugh!"
Remy hid his mouth behind his hand and Logan scowled. "You think you're so smart just because you're in a high school science class? Get your hiking boots on."
"Camping blows," Jubilee muttered.
"I dunno," Remy said. "You just ate s'mores for two meals in a row. And, you know, this is pretty nice," he said, vaguely waving his hand at the soft sunlight trickling through the trees. The campground was mostly quiet, and the fresh air smelled like pine and smoke.
Jubilee looked around and sighed. "Yeah. All right. It's... it's not as bad as I thought it would be."
"Hear that, Logan? Jubilee loves camping and wants to go every weekend!"
"Great," Logan said. "This summer we can go down to the Smokies. Bear country, there."
Jubilee's eyes widened. "No, no no. Let's just go on this nice hike here. I promise I'll be good. Just don't make me go to bear country."
"All right, then, get your boots on," Logan said. "Daylight--"
"Is burning. I got it. Jeeze. Let a girl go to the bathroom first," Jubilee said, stalking off down the trail.
Remy glanced at Logan. "When you say bear country..."
Logan shook his head. "Don't worry. You two are not invited."
Remy nodded, seriously. "I get it. We'll embarrass you in front of your people."
"Look, it's not my fault you can't keep your mouth shut," Logan said, but he sounded proud of himself.
"It is, though," Remy said. "You're the best there is at what you do... and you're gonna get us kicked out of this campground."
"Ah, well," Logan said philosophically. "We been kicked outta worse places."
Pairing/Character: Logan/Remy, Jubilee
Rating: PG-13
Fandom: X-Men
Words: ~4000
Summary: A family camping trip.
"Well, which do you prefer: snoring or bears?" Logan asked.
"You said there weren't any bears!"
Notes: Written in the same general verse as Does a Mall Babe Eat Chili Fries?, which I guess I'm gonna go ahead and call Adopted Dad Logan 'verse.
"Remy, how is this supposed to work?" Jubilee whined as she fidgeted with a long, flexible pole.
"Hell if I know," Remy muttered. Across the campsite, Logan had already assembled the larger of the two tents. He was sitting at a wooden picnic table and smirking at them. Remy hated looking like a fool, but it wasn't like he'd ever put up a tent before. It had been Logan's brilliant idea to go away for the weekend and see "nature." It was like he didn't know that the mansion got several cable channels dedicated to nature. Remy straightened his shoulders. "C'mon, cherie, can't be that hard if Logan can do it."
Jubilee grinned at that and said, "And there are only like four pieces."
Remy shook out the big piece of nylon and examined it closely. "Looks like the poles are supposed to go in here."
"In these little sleeves? I mean, I guess, where else would they go, right?" Jubilee threaded a pole into the opposite end of the tent and worked it across. Remy took it once it reached the middle of the tent and inched it toward him.
"Daylight's burnin'," Logan said. God, he could be an asshole. Remy ignored him and snapped the pole into place.
"Looks good, cher, now we just have to do the other one," Remy said brightly. It slid into place a bit faster, now that the first pole was providing some tension to the fabric. Once it was snapped into place, the tent looked very tent-like.
"That wasn't so hard!" Jubilee said. "But what are we supposed to do with these extra pieces?"
Remy shrugged, and Logan spoke up. "That's the rain fly. Nice to have. If it rains."
Jubilee glanced up at the sky, then down at the smaller piece of nylon cloth. "Where's it go? Just over the other piece of tent?"
"Yup," Logan said. He lit a cigar and smiled.
"Lo-gan," Jubilee whined, but he just shook his head.
"Look, darlin', this stuff's important. You'll learn better if you figure it out yourself than if I just tell you."
"When am I ever going to pitch a tent again?"
"Best to be prepared. Anyway, hurry up with the tent, because the next lesson is that y'only get to eat what y'can cook." Jubilee briefly closed her eyes so Logan wouldn't see her rolling them, and he added, "By the way, I took the candy bars out of your backpack back when we stopped for gas."
Jubilee swore in Chinese, then added, "Come on, I was just following the Girl Scout motto. Be prepared."
"Be prepared to have wildlife in your tent, more like."
"Wildlife? Like bears?"
"No," Logan said, breathing out a puff of smoke. "There's no bears here. Well, not usually, anyway."
"Come on, cherie, let's finish this tent," Remy called.
"You're lucky, Remy, Logan put together your tent."
"Oui, I'm a lucky man," Remy agreed. "On the other hand, Logan snores something awful."
Jubilee laughed, a little, as she fidgeted with a smaller pole. She managed to wedge it into a small joint in the front of the tent frame, and triumphantly pulled the fly over the tent and attached it to the new bar. She stood back and admired her work. Remy stood next to her and frowned. It didn't look quite right, somehow, and Logan's snicker confirmed that something was wrong.
"Close, darlin," he said. "But think about it. The point of the rain fly is to have something that will shed rain water away from your tent."
Jubilee swore again. "This little bar thing is upside down, isn't it?"
"But aren't you glad you found out now, instead of in the middle of a rainstorm?"
Jubilee muttered, "I wish you guys were teaching me how to book a hotel room."
"You know, that is an important skill," Remy mused, reflecting on several of his own hotel booking missteps.
"Maybe next spring break," Logan said.
"Maybe Christmas break, so you don't get some kinda fool idea like ice fishing in your head," Remy said.
"Ice fishing?" Jubilee squeaked, looking up from the tent frame. "Is that a thing?"
"Unfortunately," Remy said, helping her pull the rain fly tight.
"There," Jubilee said. "That's it, right? Right?"
"Just about," Logan said. "Tell me, though, what happens if it gets real windy?"
Jubilee bit her lip and peered into the tent bag. She fished out a handful of yellow plastic pegs. "You know, you don't have to tie a hotel room to the ground to keep it from flying away," she said.
"Well, a hotel room don't have a view like this, now, does it?" Logan asked, indicating the forest around them.
"Yeah, because nobody would be dumb enough to build a hotel in the middle of the woods," Jubilee said, viciously shoving the pegs into the sandy campsite.
"Look on the bright side, Jubilee," Remy said. "Least we're at a campground with real toilets. Logan wanted to take us out into the backwoods somewhere. Somewhere we'd have to dig holes."
"Ew," Jubilee said. "Okay, Wolvie, is it done? Or did we forget to dig the moat around it? Or the bear trap? Are we supposed to set up one of those?"
Logan quirked his lips. "I think that'll do it, darlin'. You can set up your sleeping bag and stuff and then we'll start dinner."
"What's for dinner?" Remy asked.
"Whatever Jubilee makes us."
Remy narrowed his eyes. "And you already threw away the candy bars?"
"Yup."
Remy let out a long breath. At times like this, he knew it was no good to think about all the other lovers he could have chosen. Remy liked to go out to eat, to restaurants where the waiters had to be nice to you even if you showed up with, well, Logan. But, he reminded himself, it was only two nights, and he'd endured much worse.
Jubilee climbed back out of her tent and said, "Okay, Iron Chef, what's next?"
"You know how to start a fire?" Logan asked.
Jubilee extended a hand and shot off a small glimmer of fireworks.
"Okay, and how are you gonna cook with that?" Logan said.
Jubilee shrugged, and Logan said, "Okay, then, c'mere."
Jubilee crouched next to Logan and frowned into the firepit. Logan said, "I already split some wood. Can you get a fire going?"
Remy perched on the picnic table to watch what he was sure would be an entertaining show. Jubilee haphazardly dumped some chunks of wood into the pit and tried to light them, to no avail. He lit a cigarette and watched as Jubilee grew increasingly frustrated. Logan remained serene, but eventually stepped in and showed Jubilee how to arrange the wood in a square pattern, with small pieces of tinder in the center. With the wood properly arranged, Jubilee's paf started a decent fire.
"All right," Logan said, "What are we going to eat?"
Jubilee blew her bangs out of her face and said, "You packed the coolers."
"Yup. So, what are we going to eat?"
Remy would swear that Jubilee audibly rolled her eyes as she rolled to her feet and examined the contents of the cooler. "Ew. Raw meat," she observed. "And beer."
"Well," Logan said. "You got meat. You got a fire. What are you going to do with it?"
"Put it on a stick?"
"Ain't hot dogs, Jubilee. Hand me a beer, will ya?"
"Can I have one?"
"Suit yourself," Logan replied. She fished three beers out of the cooler and passed one to Remy, who happily accepted. He realized that Logan would quickly heal from food poisoning and mentally cursed. But he saw how much Logan was enjoying this and managed to keep his mouth shut (for once in his life). Instead, he drank his beer and reached in his pocket for a deck of cards to fidget with while he watched Logan show Jubilee how to wrap the meat in foil with some vegetables and cook it directly in the camp fire.
"Mm. Put the meat there, the outside's gonna burn black and the inside'll be cold," he said. "You want to find a nice spot of coals."
"Coal?" Jubilee asked.
"Coals," Logan said patiently. He pointed out a glowing white-hot spot and Jubilee hesitantly dropped the foil packet down.
"How do you know when it's done?" she asked.
Logan shrugged. "You check it."
"How long is this gonna take? I'm starving."
"Check it in maybe ten minutes, Jubes."
Jubilee let out a huge sigh and sat down next to Remy. She couldn't quite keep a grimace off her face as she sipped her Heineken, but she didn't say a word about it.
"Hey, petite, pick a card," he said. She rolled her eyes but obliged him. She pretended not to be impressed when he successfully pulled her card out through one of her enormous hoop earrings, but he could tell that she had enjoyed it. Before long, Logan prompted Jubilee to check the meat. To everyone's surprise, except perhaps Logan's, it was done and appeared edible.
"It's good!" Jubilee said after her first bite. "Who knew?"
"It ain't bad," Logan agreed, shaking more salt onto his plate.
"Real good, especially for your first try," Remy added.
"And, hey, no dishes to wash!" Jubilee chirped. "Just foil. Well, and the forks, I guess."
"Yup," Logan said.
After the three of them had licked their forks clean, Jubilee said, "I seriously hope there's s'mores for dessert. That's what you're supposed to do when you camp."
"What do you know about what you're supposed to do when you camp?" Logan grumbled, but then he added, "Look in the other cooler."
Jubilee switched on her flashlight and investigated. She came back to the picnic table beaming, carrying slightly damp chocolate bars, marshmallows, and graham crackers.
"You're the best, Logan!"
"Yeah, yeah," Logan said, but he managed a small smile as Jubilee happily stabbed a couple marshmallows onto a stick. The smile turned into a throaty laugh when she promptly set them on fire and shrieked. Then she blew out the flames and experimentally ate one.
"Hey. They're not bad like this," she said.
"You ain't never had a burnt marshmallow before?" Logan asked.
Jubilee shrugged. "Well, my parents weren't really into camping, and after they died... " she trailed off and popped the other blackened marshmallow in her mouth.
Remy glanced sideway at Logan, whose mouth tightened slightly before he said, "If you wanna roast it brown, you should hold it over the coals, not the flame."
"Who knew coals were so important?" Jubilee mused, before putting two new marshmallows on the stick and gamely following Logan's advice.
Remy happily accepted the s'more Jubilee made for him. He caught Logan staring when he licked his fingers clean, and Remy smirked. Logan sent Jubilee down to the communal pump to wash the silverware. She went, only grumbling a little bit, and Logan leaned over and kissed Remy.
"Mmm," Remy purred when they finally broke apart. "Real nice, cher. Y'taste like marshmallows."
"Mm. You, too," Logan growled, before leaning in again. Remy was more or less on Logan's lap when Jubilee came back and shone a flashlight on them.
"Aw, Jesus," Jubilee said. "Get a room. I mean a tent."
Remy batted his eyelashes. Logan said, "We'll put the fire out. Why don't you get settled in for bed, darlin'?"
"What? It's like, eight o'clock."
"So read a book."
Remy very much doubted that Jubilee had packed a book, but he also doubted that she wanted to sit around and watch him make out with Logan. She huffed, "Fine. Good night."
"Bonsoir, cherie!"
"Night, Jubes. Don't let the bedbugs bite."
"Eew." Jubilee stalked off and zipped her tent shut. Remy grinned at Logan and headed for their tent. Logan splashed some water on the last glowing embers of the campfire, then followed Remy in and zipped the tent up forcefully behind them.
They undressed hastily. Remy said, "Dieu, it got cold."
Logan laughed roughly. "Better warm you up, then." He pushed Remy down onto one of the sleeping bags and nipped at Remy's throat. Remy arched his back and pressed himself against Logan. Logan hungrily made his way down Remy's body and took his cock into his mouth.
Remy moaned loudly. He hoped Jubilee had brought her iPod. She probably had. Before long, Logan made Remy forget his concern about noise. Remy had always been, as they say, a screamer.
"Still cold?" Logan asked, after Remy had his very audible orgasm.
"Can't say that I am," Remy purred. He reached out a hand and caressed Logan's back gratefully. "How about you, Logan? How you feel?"
Logan kissed Remy hard before murmuring, "I think you can guess."
Remy winked. "Oh, mm-hmm. I'm a real good guesser." He teased Logan with his mouth before taking his lover's thick cock into his mouth. Logan took his sweet time about it, and Remy's jaw ached by the time Logan finished.
Remy got a pleased "Mm" in response to what he knew was an epic blow job. He knew it was high praise from Logan, though he still preferred it when he could elicit more of a verbal response from his lover. He snaked his way back up Logan's body and curled against him. Logan tightened an arm around him for a moment and said, "Let's get under the sleeping bag. Don't want you to freeze, darlin."
"So thoughtful," Remy murmured.
Logan snorted. "You're no good to me if your lips turn blue."
"Hmph," Remy said. Logan's broad hand gently traced circles on Remy's back, and Remy quickly dozed off under the warm down sleeping bag.
He and Logan both scrambled awake to the sound of Jubilee's cry. Logan threw open the tent's zipper and ran out into the campsite. "Jubilee? You okay?"
"I just heard--I heard a bear, I swear."
Remy poked his head out of the tent and saw Jubilee looking sheepish and scared. He knew what she meant--it was too quiet out here, and the sound of every snapping twig was magnified. He'd be a little nervous about bears himself if he weren't sharing a sleeping bag with Wolverine. If it came down to it, Remy was pretty sure he could fight off a bear, but it was not his area of expertise.
Logan sighed. "Jubilee, I told you, there are no bears here."
Jubilee sounded slightly calmer when she said, "Oh my God, are you naked?"
"I thought you were being attacked. You wanted me to stop and put some pants on if you were in danger?"
"Oh. Um. I guess not. Um. Thanks," Jubilee muttered, her eyes and flashlight pointed at the ground.
"Probably heard, I dunno, a deer. Or another camper. No bears here, I promise," Logan said. "I'd smell 'em."
Jubilee took a deep breath. "Okay. Yeah. I'm sure it was nothing," she said bravely.
"Good night, darlin'," Logan said.
"Night," Jubilee whispered, slinking back across the campsite to her tent.
Logan climbed back into the tent. Remy curled against him. "So brave, mon coeur. Ready to take on a bear."
Logan snorted. "Yeah. Hell, I'll take on a hundred imaginary bears." Logan was breathing a little harder than usual from the adrenaline. Remy could make out the look on Logan's face in the dark, and he liked what he saw. And he'd be lying if he said he wasn't turned on by the image of a nude Logan running off into the woods to fight a bear. Logan let out a low growl and pressed himself against Remy. They both managed another noisy set of orgasms before returning to sleep, only to be again awoken by Jubilee outside their tent.
"Um. Guys. Are you awake?" she whispered loudly.
"What's wrong, Jubilee?" Logan said.
She took a deep breath. "Um, it'sjustcanIsleepwithyouguysplease?"
Remy bit back a laugh. "Sure, cherie," he said. "Just, ah, give us a moment."
Jubilee let out a strangled, frustrated sound. "Fine," she said. "I'm... I'm gonna go get my sleeping bag."
Remy groped around the tent, sleepily searching for his boxers. He squirmed into them. Logan watched mournfully before getting dressed himself.
"You packed coffee, right, cher?" Remy asked.
"Course," Logan said. "Instant."
Remy made a face but kept quiet, knowing it was better than nothing.
"Um, are you guys, you know, decent?" Jubilee called softly.
"Come in, cherie," Remy said.
"Thanks," she muttered. She set down her sleeping bag and nestled into it. "There's just, um. There's just a lot of stuff out here."
"I hear you," Remy said.
Logan chuckled. "The most dangerous thing in these woods is right here in this tent."
"Yeah, yeah, you're soo tough," Jubilee said.
"Ah, girl, I meant you," Logan said. "Teenage girl full of hormones and fireworks."
"Whatever," Jubilee said, but Remy could hear a smile in her voice.
"Good night, Jubes," Remy said.
"Night," she replied, and before long Remy heard her peaceful, even breathing. He smiled and drifted off to sleep himself. He woke up again to a hushed conversation between Logan and Jubilee.
"Kid, you can't just poke me when I'm sleeping," Logan chided.
"Sorry, Logan, it's just, um, you were snoring. Really loud."
Remy bit his lip. "I did warn you about that," he said. "You get used to it after awhile."
"Well, which do you prefer: snoring or bears?" Logan asked.
"You said there weren't any bears!"
"There aren't," Logan said, "Except in your head."
Jubilee considered before saying. "I... I'll still take your snoring over, you know, the other sounds. I guess."
"All right. Then let me get some goddamn sleep, Jubilee," Logan said.
"Sorry," Jubilee muttered. She was right, though. Logan did snore, although Remy could sleep through pretty much everything. Everything except freezing to death.
He woke up with his teeth chattering and pressed against Logan, trying to climb into his lover's skin.
"So cold," he said. He could see his breath.
Logan chuckled. "Tends to get a bit chilly before the sun comes up, yeah."
"This is awful. Why would anyone get up at this hour?" Remy said.
Logan obligingly rubbed his hands over Remy, warming him slightly. It was no use, though. Remy was sure it had to be below zero. Before long, though, Logan was climbing out of the sleeping bag.
"Noo," Remy whined. "I'll freeze to death."
"No, you won't," Logan said. He threw a backpack at Remy. "I'm gonna go start a fire. That'll warm you up."
Remy blinked. Logan was getting up now? The sky was a pale grey. It was not time to be awake.
Logan said, "Daylight's burnin'. Get dressed. You'll warm up."
Sighing, Remy pulled on every layer of clothing he had packed. Jubilee woke up, black hair sticking out in all directions, and whined, "It's freezing!"
"Believe me, I know," Remy said. "Logan's starting a fire."
Jubilee pulled jeans and a sweatshirt over her pajamas. She snuggled up against Remy on the picnic table by the fire pit, and he tucked her in under his leather coat.
Logan smiled at them indulgently and put some water on the fire to boil, and the three of them drank more than their fair share of instant coffee.
"Can we have s'mores for breakfast?" Jubilee asked.
Logan shrugged. "I don't see why not."
Jubilee grinned. "Camping is awesome."
Remy returned her grin over his mug of terrible coffee. "It ain't bad," he agreed. The fire and the increasing sunlight had warmed him up some, and his mood had improved considerably.
Logan shook his head. "It's certainly a lot more exciting with you two around."
"Duh," Jubilee said.
Then the trio looked up from their sugary breakfast at the sound of an approaching golf cart. A cheery park ranger said, "Good morning! How are you folks doing today?"
"Just fine, and yourself?" Remy said, before Logan could reply.
"Well, I'm fine!" the ranger chirped. "But I just wanted to swing by because we had some reports of strange noises last night. Any of you folks hear anything?"
"Strange noises?" Remy asked politely.
The ranger nodded. "Well, screaming. We had reports of men screaming."
"That was me," Jubilee blurted. The ranger raised an eyebrow and Jubilee said, "I thought I heard a bear, and, I've never been camping before, and, um, it was me." She chewed on a lock of hair before adding, "I guess I have a deep voice when I scream or something."
"I see," the ranger said. "Well, I hope everyone's all right?"
"Oh, yeah, we're fine. We're great," Jubilee said, smiling sweetly. "But thanks for checking!"
"Yes. Of course. Well... just so you know, these woods are not known to be a habitat for bears. But please don't hesitate to stop by the ranger station if there are any problems. And, ah, if there aren't any problems, please do remember that there is a noise ordinance... we keep quiet hours here between 10pm and 6am." She glanced sideways at Logan and Remy before brightening her smile and adding, "Have a wonderful stay here!"
"Oh, we will," Jubilee said. After the ranger sped off in her golf cart, Jubilee flashed a huge grin at Remy and Logan. "You guys so owe me."
Remy shrugged. "We saved you from a bear last night. I figure we're even."
"That wasn't you, that was Logan."
"I would have backed him up, though," Remy said indignantly.
"There are no goddamn bears here," Logan said.
"Just a couple of dudes who can't keep their mouths shut when they... you know," Jubilee said, sounding both amused and horrified.
Remy smiled down at her over his mug. Logan cleared his throat and said, "Let's get breakfast cleaned up so we can start our hike. Daylight's burnin'."
Jubilee said, "Stop saying that! Of course it's burning! That's what the sun does! Ugh!"
Remy hid his mouth behind his hand and Logan scowled. "You think you're so smart just because you're in a high school science class? Get your hiking boots on."
"Camping blows," Jubilee muttered.
"I dunno," Remy said. "You just ate s'mores for two meals in a row. And, you know, this is pretty nice," he said, vaguely waving his hand at the soft sunlight trickling through the trees. The campground was mostly quiet, and the fresh air smelled like pine and smoke.
Jubilee looked around and sighed. "Yeah. All right. It's... it's not as bad as I thought it would be."
"Hear that, Logan? Jubilee loves camping and wants to go every weekend!"
"Great," Logan said. "This summer we can go down to the Smokies. Bear country, there."
Jubilee's eyes widened. "No, no no. Let's just go on this nice hike here. I promise I'll be good. Just don't make me go to bear country."
"All right, then, get your boots on," Logan said. "Daylight--"
"Is burning. I got it. Jeeze. Let a girl go to the bathroom first," Jubilee said, stalking off down the trail.
Remy glanced at Logan. "When you say bear country..."
Logan shook his head. "Don't worry. You two are not invited."
Remy nodded, seriously. "I get it. We'll embarrass you in front of your people."
"Look, it's not my fault you can't keep your mouth shut," Logan said, but he sounded proud of himself.
"It is, though," Remy said. "You're the best there is at what you do... and you're gonna get us kicked out of this campground."
"Ah, well," Logan said philosophically. "We been kicked outta worse places."