What the Fuuuuuck...
I love my family. Most of the time. But this takes the cake in terms of sheer asswaddery.
"Once upon a time there was a girl named Ashley. Ashley was a bad girl with bad luck. She smoked, drank, did drugs and partied all night. She had random unprotected sex and then had abortions to get rid of all the babies she would have had with pot-smoking losers. But one day she converted to Christianity and everything became all better. The end."
This sort of "convert now and it'll put a bandaid on your life" tripe is just the sort of thing I was exposed to last Saturday night. Granted, it was a movie called "Facing the Giants" (which would have made a better football movie than a Christian infomercial, with endless proselytizing every five minutes), but the message was the same. The coach had a house falling apart, a car that wouldn't start, and he couldn't even knock up his wife. Not to mention, in the spirit of all football coach movies, he hasn't had a single winning season. All of a sudden he submits his soul to the almighty God(tm), and WOW!!! Lookit that! His team starts winning, his team buys him a new truck, and he gets a raise to help repair the house. And YAY!!!! A baby on the way! Isn't that sweet.
*gag*
Reason for this rant being, lately my uncle has been dragging me to church against my will, expecting me to have some Great Epiphany and become a sparkly-eyed True Christian(tm) who lives for the power of Jeezus and decides to start passing pamphlets and weep with big sloppy tears in the middle of services.
Please allow me a moment to start laughing my ass off. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA--
Seriously. Not gonna happen.
At least they aren't fundamentalist or dominionist, but they're just as -annoying- sometimes. It's Church of the Nazarene, so they tend to believe that God is wholly benevolent and wants the best for everyone. Obviously they've never really read the Bible. If God is supposed to be so loving and gentle, then by the looks of things in this world he's either retarded and doesn't know what the hell's going on, or is not, in fact, benevolent and is instead one vindictive and hateful bastard. Judging by who you ask.
That, and I resent the fact that they're not respecting my wish to stay home. I'm seeking Eckankar (looking into it tentatively, Witchycraft wasn't really catching my spiritual attention), and while I haven't said anything about it yet it's an insult to be forced to go to a church that I don't like.
But that's not the end of the story. I wrote the above snippet at my uncle's house, and I accidentally left my notebook there. They finally brought it back a few days ago, and I was none the wiser. But TODAY I decided not to go to the Bible study that I attended ONCE just to ask their pastor what he thought of some of the sick stuff that happens in the Bible....and he starts screaming at me, saying I never appreciate his help, that he's concerned for my soul, that I'm going to hell and that I hate God. Well DUH. I tend to dislike any deity who shows such blatant hatred towards everyone besides his followers.
Then I find out that he READ MY NOTEBOOK. WITH ALL THAT INSIDE IT.
FUCK.
Diary rape, and now he's taking it a step further. HE MADE A COPY OF WHAT I WROTE. To BLACKMAIL me into going to the stupid Bible study OR ELSE.
WHO THE FUCK does this to their relatives, is what I'd like to know. And he's still not taking no for an answer. I want that copy. I want -all- copies so I can burn them. But he's not giving it over. WTF.
"Once upon a time there was a girl named Ashley. Ashley was a bad girl with bad luck. She smoked, drank, did drugs and partied all night. She had random unprotected sex and then had abortions to get rid of all the babies she would have had with pot-smoking losers. But one day she converted to Christianity and everything became all better. The end."
This sort of "convert now and it'll put a bandaid on your life" tripe is just the sort of thing I was exposed to last Saturday night. Granted, it was a movie called "Facing the Giants" (which would have made a better football movie than a Christian infomercial, with endless proselytizing every five minutes), but the message was the same. The coach had a house falling apart, a car that wouldn't start, and he couldn't even knock up his wife. Not to mention, in the spirit of all football coach movies, he hasn't had a single winning season. All of a sudden he submits his soul to the almighty God(tm), and WOW!!! Lookit that! His team starts winning, his team buys him a new truck, and he gets a raise to help repair the house. And YAY!!!! A baby on the way! Isn't that sweet.
*gag*
Reason for this rant being, lately my uncle has been dragging me to church against my will, expecting me to have some Great Epiphany and become a sparkly-eyed True Christian(tm) who lives for the power of Jeezus and decides to start passing pamphlets and weep with big sloppy tears in the middle of services.
Please allow me a moment to start laughing my ass off. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA--
Seriously. Not gonna happen.
At least they aren't fundamentalist or dominionist, but they're just as -annoying- sometimes. It's Church of the Nazarene, so they tend to believe that God is wholly benevolent and wants the best for everyone. Obviously they've never really read the Bible. If God is supposed to be so loving and gentle, then by the looks of things in this world he's either retarded and doesn't know what the hell's going on, or is not, in fact, benevolent and is instead one vindictive and hateful bastard. Judging by who you ask.
That, and I resent the fact that they're not respecting my wish to stay home. I'm seeking Eckankar (looking into it tentatively, Witchycraft wasn't really catching my spiritual attention), and while I haven't said anything about it yet it's an insult to be forced to go to a church that I don't like.
But that's not the end of the story. I wrote the above snippet at my uncle's house, and I accidentally left my notebook there. They finally brought it back a few days ago, and I was none the wiser. But TODAY I decided not to go to the Bible study that I attended ONCE just to ask their pastor what he thought of some of the sick stuff that happens in the Bible....and he starts screaming at me, saying I never appreciate his help, that he's concerned for my soul, that I'm going to hell and that I hate God. Well DUH. I tend to dislike any deity who shows such blatant hatred towards everyone besides his followers.
Then I find out that he READ MY NOTEBOOK. WITH ALL THAT INSIDE IT.
FUCK.
Diary rape, and now he's taking it a step further. HE MADE A COPY OF WHAT I WROTE. To BLACKMAIL me into going to the stupid Bible study OR ELSE.
WHO THE FUCK does this to their relatives, is what I'd like to know. And he's still not taking no for an answer. I want that copy. I want -all- copies so I can burn them. But he's not giving it over. WTF.