I can't let you
Title: I Can't Let You...
Author: remorsful_rain
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Kirk/Bones
Disclaimer: I don't own Star Trek or it's characters I'm just playing with them a little.
Summary: The boys have a bit of a misunderstanding.
The bar was musky and the air was thick with the smell of smoke, but Jim wasn’t there for breathable air. He was just there to kill some time before Bones got back from his classes.
Jim leaned a little further against the bar and let his legs dangle open and lose, just letting his body relax. Sipping his beer he eyed the crowd, there were a couple of women he’d be willing to cruse, but he really was trying to keep the whole ‘going home with random strangers’ thing to a minimum. Occasional flirting was okay, because well he was Jim Kirk after all, and he knew Bone still expected him to act like that. It’d been another ten days since the nightmare incident, and though he was currently becoming very acquainted with his right hand, Jim felt he was close to actually getting Bones to let him kiss him. He was trying damn it.
A splash of blonde suddenly filled his line of vision, as a thin, curvy woman bounced up to him, her green eyes half lidded and her lipstick just a little too thick.
“Hey, you’re Jim Kirk aren’t you?” She asked, he voice sticky sweet.
Jim shifted so he was sitting a little straighter and tried to lean a little further back. It was nice when women threw themselves at him, but he was waiting for Bones. Jim had actually gotten Bones to stop by a bar after their classes, and that didn’t happen often. He really didn’t want the stick figure blonde when he could have Bones’ broad shoulders and very talented hands.
He only managed to get out a “Yeah,” before she was in his lap.
“Actually I’m waiting for-” he tried to explain, but her thin lips were already on his.
It took him a few long seconds for Jim to pull away, because damn she was a good kisser, but he did. She stumbled back with a pout.
“Like I was telling you, I’m waiting for someone,” Jim gave her a calm glare as he wiped, her lipstick off his mouth with his sleeve.
She sent him a hate-filled glare and flounced off. Jim watched her progress until she stopped next to a sturdily built man that looked like he might work out for a living. She was telling him something while waving in Jim’s basic direction. Once the big man turned to pin him with a ‘glare-of-death’ that paled in comparison to Bones’, Jim could guess what she’s told him. ‘Oh that big bad man over there tried to force himself on me.’ It’d been used before when he’d turned down other women. Sighing Jim paid his tab and left, heading toward Bones’ dorm, hoping he would catch the doctor on his way to the bar.
Jim didn’t see him along the way and his dorm was strangely, but not oddly empty. Bones tended to work extra shifts or work on lab projects sometimes. Writing it of Jim shrugged and turned toward his own dorm yawning. He’d talk to Bones tomorrow.
Only, no he didn’t, because he didn’t see Bones at all the next day. They didn’t have many classes together considering he was on the officer track while Bones was medical, but Jim at least saw him between classes. He wasn’t in any of their shared classes either, and Jim began to worry. It wasn’t like Bones to skip classes. After his last class Jim made his way to Bones’ dorm only to find Bones’ wasn’t there and to his surprise the security code had been changed. Jim, just nodded and left, worry burying its self deep in his chest.
Bones’ avoided him the next day too, Jim was sure that was exactly what he was doing. After asking around, he’d been the only person who hadn’t seen Bones, and Jim was getting a little peeved. On day three he forwent his classes and spent the day tracking Bones. It had taken him most of the day, a few compromising situations, and a lot of work but Jim finally had the elusive Bones pin pointed to his dorm room.
Jim knocked on the door, irritated when he didn’t get an answer he yelled through it, “Bones?”
After more silence he tried again, “Bones I know you’re in there.”
More silence, “Damn it Bones! Open the door. If you don’t I can just always hack through the door control. You know I can.”
Silence then the sound of someone moving around. The door slid open to reveal a Bones that really didn’t look all that happy to see him.
Jim eyed the frown, the blood shot eyes, and dark circles under rather angry looking eyes.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“What do you think?” The question was spit with such anger that, it made Jim rock back on his heels.
“What?” Jim asked, confused at the sudden display of animosity. Where had that some from?
“You know full well what I’m talking about.”
“No, I’m pretty sure I don’t.”
Bones’ fury seemed to double, “You and that blonde you couldn’t keep your hands off of.”
Jim blinked, “Okay I think this is a conversation we don’t need to have standing in the hallway.”
He deftly ducked under Bones arm and walked into the room, feeling angry hazel eyes on him all the while.
“Is this about that blonde chick that threw herself at me a few days ago?” Jim asked, turning to look at Bones, already knowing where this was heading.
“No this is about your inability to keep it in your pants.”
“What?! I didn’t do anything to her! She threw herself at me and then went and whined to her boyfriend when I pushed her away.” Jim snapped defending himself. That was low and Bones knew it.
“Sure.” Bones snorted crossing his arms and rolling his eyes.
Jim glared at him for a moment.
“I didn’t go fuck her if that’s what you’re thinking. I was sitting there waiting for you, and then there she was in my lap.”
“Where have I heard that one before?” Bones growled, not relaxing his posture.
“I told you I was trying! All I’ve done is flirt a little. I don’t want to screw up our relationship!” Jim desperately gestured. He could feel control, and a little of something else slipping through his fingers, and he couldn’t stop them from falling.
“Too late. The thing is I knew I couldn’t trust you, my common sense was telling me you wouldn’t be able to resist fucking someone else, but Dammit Jim I… I ended up trusting you anyway.” Bones whispered hoarsely, running a hand through his limp hair. “Look where it got me, right back to square zero.”
“But-”
“No Jim. I can’t deal with this now. I think you should go.” Bones sighed, turning away.
Jim could see the dejection in every line of Bones body, he felt the part of him that had begun to be buried fall open again. It always happened, one way or another. Jim was always left by those he cared about.
“Okay.” He whispered, lowering his eyes. This wasn’t over not by a long shot, but he knew better than to push too far. Bones hadn’t said they were over and that was enough for now, it allowed him to hold on to that small bit of hope.
Jim slowly turned and walked back to the door. He paused to glance over his shoulder at the one man that he would never give up on. Then he turned back, eyes set in determination as the door swung shut behind him.
I'm holding onto you
I'll never let go
I need you with me as I
enter the shadows - Shadows -RED
______________________________
Finally another instalment in this series. Honestly it's been sitting in my hard drive for awhile. Per the usual this is unbeta'd, any mistakes are mine, let me know if there are any major ones. Hope you enjoyed!
Author: remorsful_rain
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Kirk/Bones
Disclaimer: I don't own Star Trek or it's characters I'm just playing with them a little.
Summary: The boys have a bit of a misunderstanding.
The bar was musky and the air was thick with the smell of smoke, but Jim wasn’t there for breathable air. He was just there to kill some time before Bones got back from his classes.
Jim leaned a little further against the bar and let his legs dangle open and lose, just letting his body relax. Sipping his beer he eyed the crowd, there were a couple of women he’d be willing to cruse, but he really was trying to keep the whole ‘going home with random strangers’ thing to a minimum. Occasional flirting was okay, because well he was Jim Kirk after all, and he knew Bone still expected him to act like that. It’d been another ten days since the nightmare incident, and though he was currently becoming very acquainted with his right hand, Jim felt he was close to actually getting Bones to let him kiss him. He was trying damn it.
A splash of blonde suddenly filled his line of vision, as a thin, curvy woman bounced up to him, her green eyes half lidded and her lipstick just a little too thick.
“Hey, you’re Jim Kirk aren’t you?” She asked, he voice sticky sweet.
Jim shifted so he was sitting a little straighter and tried to lean a little further back. It was nice when women threw themselves at him, but he was waiting for Bones. Jim had actually gotten Bones to stop by a bar after their classes, and that didn’t happen often. He really didn’t want the stick figure blonde when he could have Bones’ broad shoulders and very talented hands.
He only managed to get out a “Yeah,” before she was in his lap.
“Actually I’m waiting for-” he tried to explain, but her thin lips were already on his.
It took him a few long seconds for Jim to pull away, because damn she was a good kisser, but he did. She stumbled back with a pout.
“Like I was telling you, I’m waiting for someone,” Jim gave her a calm glare as he wiped, her lipstick off his mouth with his sleeve.
She sent him a hate-filled glare and flounced off. Jim watched her progress until she stopped next to a sturdily built man that looked like he might work out for a living. She was telling him something while waving in Jim’s basic direction. Once the big man turned to pin him with a ‘glare-of-death’ that paled in comparison to Bones’, Jim could guess what she’s told him. ‘Oh that big bad man over there tried to force himself on me.’ It’d been used before when he’d turned down other women. Sighing Jim paid his tab and left, heading toward Bones’ dorm, hoping he would catch the doctor on his way to the bar.
Jim didn’t see him along the way and his dorm was strangely, but not oddly empty. Bones tended to work extra shifts or work on lab projects sometimes. Writing it of Jim shrugged and turned toward his own dorm yawning. He’d talk to Bones tomorrow.
Only, no he didn’t, because he didn’t see Bones at all the next day. They didn’t have many classes together considering he was on the officer track while Bones was medical, but Jim at least saw him between classes. He wasn’t in any of their shared classes either, and Jim began to worry. It wasn’t like Bones to skip classes. After his last class Jim made his way to Bones’ dorm only to find Bones’ wasn’t there and to his surprise the security code had been changed. Jim, just nodded and left, worry burying its self deep in his chest.
Bones’ avoided him the next day too, Jim was sure that was exactly what he was doing. After asking around, he’d been the only person who hadn’t seen Bones, and Jim was getting a little peeved. On day three he forwent his classes and spent the day tracking Bones. It had taken him most of the day, a few compromising situations, and a lot of work but Jim finally had the elusive Bones pin pointed to his dorm room.
Jim knocked on the door, irritated when he didn’t get an answer he yelled through it, “Bones?”
After more silence he tried again, “Bones I know you’re in there.”
More silence, “Damn it Bones! Open the door. If you don’t I can just always hack through the door control. You know I can.”
Silence then the sound of someone moving around. The door slid open to reveal a Bones that really didn’t look all that happy to see him.
Jim eyed the frown, the blood shot eyes, and dark circles under rather angry looking eyes.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“What do you think?” The question was spit with such anger that, it made Jim rock back on his heels.
“What?” Jim asked, confused at the sudden display of animosity. Where had that some from?
“You know full well what I’m talking about.”
“No, I’m pretty sure I don’t.”
Bones’ fury seemed to double, “You and that blonde you couldn’t keep your hands off of.”
Jim blinked, “Okay I think this is a conversation we don’t need to have standing in the hallway.”
He deftly ducked under Bones arm and walked into the room, feeling angry hazel eyes on him all the while.
“Is this about that blonde chick that threw herself at me a few days ago?” Jim asked, turning to look at Bones, already knowing where this was heading.
“No this is about your inability to keep it in your pants.”
“What?! I didn’t do anything to her! She threw herself at me and then went and whined to her boyfriend when I pushed her away.” Jim snapped defending himself. That was low and Bones knew it.
“Sure.” Bones snorted crossing his arms and rolling his eyes.
Jim glared at him for a moment.
“I didn’t go fuck her if that’s what you’re thinking. I was sitting there waiting for you, and then there she was in my lap.”
“Where have I heard that one before?” Bones growled, not relaxing his posture.
“I told you I was trying! All I’ve done is flirt a little. I don’t want to screw up our relationship!” Jim desperately gestured. He could feel control, and a little of something else slipping through his fingers, and he couldn’t stop them from falling.
“Too late. The thing is I knew I couldn’t trust you, my common sense was telling me you wouldn’t be able to resist fucking someone else, but Dammit Jim I… I ended up trusting you anyway.” Bones whispered hoarsely, running a hand through his limp hair. “Look where it got me, right back to square zero.”
“But-”
“No Jim. I can’t deal with this now. I think you should go.” Bones sighed, turning away.
Jim could see the dejection in every line of Bones body, he felt the part of him that had begun to be buried fall open again. It always happened, one way or another. Jim was always left by those he cared about.
“Okay.” He whispered, lowering his eyes. This wasn’t over not by a long shot, but he knew better than to push too far. Bones hadn’t said they were over and that was enough for now, it allowed him to hold on to that small bit of hope.
Jim slowly turned and walked back to the door. He paused to glance over his shoulder at the one man that he would never give up on. Then he turned back, eyes set in determination as the door swung shut behind him.
I'm holding onto you
I'll never let go
I need you with me as I
enter the shadows - Shadows -RED
______________________________
Finally another instalment in this series. Honestly it's been sitting in my hard drive for awhile. Per the usual this is unbeta'd, any mistakes are mine, let me know if there are any major ones. Hope you enjoyed!