Impulse (An Occurrence at 4 Privet Drive Remix) [Harry Potter; Dudley Dursley; Snape/Harry; PG-13]

[deathcab4buffy]

Title: Impulse (An Occurrence at 4 Privet Drive Remix)
Author: Marks (marksykins)
Summary: An impelling action or force - Dudley Dursley trained every day for this moment.
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: Snape/Harry (very mild)
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Harry Potter is owned by JK Rowling, Scholastic, Raincoast, Warner Brothers, and probably fifty other people

Comments

[dracofiend]

Zoh my god! This is incredible!! :D I laughed so many times--your characterization of Dudley, all those cute and clever turns of phrase!! I have to do a list, even if I WILL be quoting half the fic back at you:

"...he caught the way Harry's eyes instead slid to her brothers (all of them)..."
Ha ha!!!

"He'd heard that Snape was a wanker of the highest degree, the kind of teacher whose food would have got jerked off in at Smeltings..."
God, you're too funny...this is SUCH a guy thing to think, it's so right. :D

"Even if Harry liked to bend over every now and then, it shouldn't be for greasy old men who flapped around in bat robes."
Such a perfect portrayal of the inherent ickiness that is the Snarry pairing! :D I definitely had to get over it before I jumped into the Snarry.

"...Dudley passed out from fear, spilling pickled onions and mustard all down his front."
The timing of this visual was just perfect!! Sloppy scared Dudley jumps off the page.

"...he bulked up, worked out more and more, became invincible, became Bigger Big D..."
Bigger Big D?!? I cackle. I guffaw. :D

"He'd even bought a whole portable gym with rubber band tensions, even though he really preferred pumping real iron, but he understood that he'd be expected to make sacrifices."
Rubber band tensions?! Hey, I used to have those!! :D And they ARE a lot more annoying than free weights aren't they?? :D It's just such a hilarious touch--you've got all the little things in all the right places! Mad skillz!

"Dudley was a comet, Dudley was the Flash, he was a leaf on the wind, and he was paying back the debt that he'd owed Harry since his house had been attacked."
I just love the the rhythm of this line--and the 'leaf on the wind' is a gorgeous detail.

"He could see that place with the awesome sweets shop -- Pigsfeet? Hogsmeat? -- from there."
Just another fabtastic display of your Dudley voice!! Dudders cracks me up so bad here! :D

Of course the ENDING was a total shocker! :D But I laughed! I laughed and laughed and was like, ohhh, dude!!! Dudley chokes BIG! :D Of course. It's like, so in character, and somehow still such a surprise. How'd you manage to take me for such an enormous ride with this?? It's amazingly compact and so FULL of goodness! I would never ever have imagined anyone pulling anything like this out of my fluffy throwaway type quasi-drabble! :D You are master. A master!! :D I heart you majorly. Thank you so much for writing!

[dracofiend]

Hey, me again. :) Just had to say I went and read An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge...and now I like this even better! :D You brilliant, brilliant person you.

[dracofiend]

Weirdly? No way! That was pure awesomeness! :D Btw, you probably don't remember, but you're like, the first slasher I ever talked to online or in RL (well, the second--the first was your friend who brought me over to talk to you about Harry/Draco, and whose name I'm very sorry escapes me). :D It was at The Witching Hour, when I had only just found out about HP slash! And then I went home and read Oscillate Wildly on Schnoogle that night and loved it! :D Thanks again for the wonderful remix fic!!