fic: if you can't convince them, confuse them (3/?)

[relvoxballroom]

Pairing: Rachel / Quinn, side Brittany / Santana
Rating: PG13 now, NC-17 eventually
Spoilers: All episodes, just to be safe.
Summary: Quinn gets way more than she expected when she flirts with Rachel as a joke.
Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine, obviously.
Author's Note: Just pretend that Brittany dumped Artie for Santana shortly after

Comments

[fall_into_life]

Argh, again, this is all so rushed. I want to see the Unholy Trinity take Rachel in courtesy of Santana. I want to see something like Santana being all, "yeah, well, she's here now, so deal with it, bitch" or something like Brittany being affectionate with Rachel in front of Quinn, and Quinn coming slowly to accept that Rachel's not going anywhere.

I feel like this story is so compressed. There are little snippets that are very nice (like Rachel reaching over Quinn for a highlighter, totally been there), but then you just say "and so on, and so forth". Don't yadda yadda yadda. I understand wanting to jump into the good bits (boy, do I), but the anticipation and scene-setting are important too.

I really like the actual scenes we get here, but the small bits of exposition and explanation are frustrating. Don't explain away the big things (like Quinn going, "I'm into Rachel. What."), show them. If the "outtakes" are, as you've said, friendship vignettes, don't make them outtakes, put them in the story proper. I get the distinct feeling that something similar to this could happen eventually on Glee (esp. Santana-Rachel friendship), but they'd spend time showing how it happened, and I would be so much more into this story if you could do that here.

This is just my two cents, but when parts of this are done so well, and others are glossed over, it leaves me frustrated and wanting more fleshing out.

[relvoxballroom]

Okay, and now I'm starting to see why you get people that are frustrated with your commentary.

I understand that you might want this to be less compressed, but I'm not planning on writing an epic lengthed fic. If i focus more on the little things then the Quinn/Rachel thing is going to seem ridiculously rushed. And trust me, I'm not going to be telling it. I'm going to be showing it. But in a five or six chapter fic, with the detail I'm going into, a little bit of that is kind of inevitable.

I mean, if I had made Quinn hate Rachel in the first chapter, then I'd see your point. Have her gradually come to terms with Rachel being in the group. But i didn't do that. In this story, Quinn doesn't hate Rachel, at least not at this point. I also showed a very specific turning point for Santana in the first chapter. When Rachel flirts/fights back, so I don't need to go into more examples of that. It's completely redundant and unnecessary to the point of the story.

I'm writing this the way I want to write it - I'm glossing over things that I want to gloss over in order to focus on things that I want to focus on.

Either take what I'm writing at face value, or don't. But, quite honestly, you're the only one who seems to have any problem with any of this at all and I've gotten over 150 comments on this story so far on various outlets.

And, at the end of the day, I'm not writing for you. I'm writing for me. I understand that you might want other things, but I'm honestly not going to cater this story to one person when everybody else is really happy with it. And, to be honest, I'm really happy with it. As it happens, the next chapter has a Rachel/Santana scene, and a Quinn/Rachel scene, and even a Rachel/Santana/Brittany scene.

So you can either read it, not read it, print it out and burn it. I don't really care.

If you want something that satisfies you more, then I really encourage you to write something. You seem to have a really specific idea of what you're looking for. That's the reason I started writing in the first place, too - I couldn't find anything that was written the way I wanted it to be. So I decided to write something the way I wanted. That's what I'm doing now. And it's what I'm going to continue doing.

[fall_into_life]

I just went back and read my comments, and I believe the term for what I come off as is regarded as impolite.

I like this piece. That doesn't seem to have come through before, so I'll say that straight out. I like what you're doing, else I wouldn't be reading it. I'm not a troll; I don't consume just to spit things out.

Keep writing for you and not for me. That's the whole point of writing like this. I just like to offer my view, and it seems to have come out more didactic than I would like.