(no subject)
[Private]
Tasha... I can't believe this place made me forget everything about him. Well, not everything but... No name, no face, no...nothing. Even when I looked back in the journals and heard his voice. This place made me think a bunch of other people were my Master. Sure the Prince was a bit of a jerk, but Allen and the others weren't so bad... [a pause here, as she stops and purses her lips]
He said my feelings might not be real. That...whatever he saw when I thought he was my Master were my real memories, and the way I am now it's the real Halloween. But that can't be right...can it? I never once felt anything like this when I was a pumpkin. Even now it feels like my chest aches and my stomach is in knots. This never happened before...is this what it feels like to be sick? It felt much worse a few days ago when he arrived.
Damnit...why did he have to wind up here, of all people? Calling me his "King", "Your Magesty"...even having the nerve to say my mother's a Witch! I'm a Supporter made by Tasha's Master, I can't have parents. No matter what anyone elses says or thinks I'm...I'm me, aren't I? I'm Tasha Godspell's Supporter... If at least that much about me isn't true then just...just who the hell am I supposed to be?!
....Hah, I bet if that idiot could see me now he'd make fun of me right away. I'm supposed to be the one telling him not to mope around feeling sorry for himself. And Xing and Taras too...even Linda would give me a hard time. This isn't like me at all. Ugh...things were so much easier when I was a pumpkin. But I guess wishing for that is just being childish. If I don't have enough power to stand on my own two feet then there's no way I could ever call myself a Supporter.
I don't understand anything that's been going on lately...but that doesn't matter. Even if I was whatever everyone else wants to think, right now I'm just me! Halloween, the Cursed Puppet...even if I'm not much of a puppet right now, huh?
As long as I have at least this much...then I can go forward no matter what anyone says about me. I may have been something else before, but for right now this is who I am--who I want to be. I don't care if it's a Contract or Magic that makes me like this. If they have a problem with it, then I'll just drill who I am into their skulls until it's permanently engrave in their thick skulls!
[/Private]
[and with all of that settled in her mind, Halloween will be pushing herself up from where she was chillin' on the theatre stage built...ages ago...and dusting off her hands. The jorunal will pick up a sigh as she does~]
I guess I should head back. Otherwise I'll get teased about running away.
[[ooc; open/dictated, IT DON' MATTAH.]]
also yuff this is not a post in paradisa yet hold yo horses
Tasha... I can't believe this place made me forget everything about him. Well, not everything but... No name, no face, no...nothing. Even when I looked back in the journals and heard his voice. This place made me think a bunch of other people were my Master. Sure the Prince was a bit of a jerk, but Allen and the others weren't so bad... [a pause here, as she stops and purses her lips]
He said my feelings might not be real. That...whatever he saw when I thought he was my Master were my real memories, and the way I am now it's the real Halloween. But that can't be right...can it? I never once felt anything like this when I was a pumpkin. Even now it feels like my chest aches and my stomach is in knots. This never happened before...is this what it feels like to be sick? It felt much worse a few days ago when he arrived.
Damnit...why did he have to wind up here, of all people? Calling me his "King", "Your Magesty"...even having the nerve to say my mother's a Witch! I'm a Supporter made by Tasha's Master, I can't have parents. No matter what anyone elses says or thinks I'm...I'm me, aren't I? I'm Tasha Godspell's Supporter... If at least that much about me isn't true then just...just who the hell am I supposed to be?!
....Hah, I bet if that idiot could see me now he'd make fun of me right away. I'm supposed to be the one telling him not to mope around feeling sorry for himself. And Xing and Taras too...even Linda would give me a hard time. This isn't like me at all. Ugh...things were so much easier when I was a pumpkin. But I guess wishing for that is just being childish. If I don't have enough power to stand on my own two feet then there's no way I could ever call myself a Supporter.
I don't understand anything that's been going on lately...but that doesn't matter. Even if I was whatever everyone else wants to think, right now I'm just me! Halloween, the Cursed Puppet...even if I'm not much of a puppet right now, huh?
As long as I have at least this much...then I can go forward no matter what anyone says about me. I may have been something else before, but for right now this is who I am--who I want to be. I don't care if it's a Contract or Magic that makes me like this. If they have a problem with it, then I'll just drill who I am into their skulls until it's permanently engrave in their thick skulls!
[/Private]
[and with all of that settled in her mind, Halloween will be pushing herself up from where she was chillin' on the theatre stage built...ages ago...and dusting off her hands. The jorunal will pick up a sigh as she does~]
I guess I should head back. Otherwise I'll get teased about running away.
[[ooc; open/dictated, IT DON' MATTAH.]]
also yuff this is not a post in paradisa yet hold yo horses