eins
I suppose this would be a good time to think about the whole Stalker girl situation. Looking back, she was everything that I wanted. We meant to be, suppose to be but lost it. I guess it's really rrue that when people can't get their shit together nothing will happen. At some point or another one of us was not willing to take that leap, even if the other one was. She was everything. I just have a hard time letting go this connection that I know has been there for so long. The connection that has survived so much bullshit. And the good times? they were beyond what someone could ask for. She said this once, and I agree, being in the same room as her, knowing she is only a glance away brings a level of comfort and excitement that you never want to lose.
I knew her back when she was this shy little high school junior who just wanted to get the hell out of her small town and create her own life. She was ready upon ready to walk out the door and never look back. At that point we had already had many ups and downs but there was, as always, that nagging desire. She enters college the fall I starting dating Katie. Once again, we are interrupted. We lose contact for the standard few months and then circle back. First time, when I was with Jessica, and then, now again while I am with Katie.
I go through an intense year with Katie and as it would seem AIleen had a hard time with abusively controlling girlfriend. The summer of 06 rolls in and out with nothing much. Fall comes and she and I talk a bit more. It wasn't until I was just days away from leaving for Germany does it begin to get more serious.
The distance that Germany provided turned into a breeding ground for sweet nothings to be whispered in my ear. Promises, wishes, dreams were confided and plans were made for the night of my arrival.
I arrive home after 19+ hours of international travel and not only is she receiving me but so are all members of immideate family but also 4 seperate friends. It was a lot to take in but I tried my damndest to keep her comfortable, I even drove home with her! The night is a bit crazy with laughter, stories and take out pizza but as it calms down and I take a walk up to my room with Aileen.
Finally I am realizing all that I have fantasized. Finally I there in my bed with her. Everything was suppose to be the way was. It was all I wanted. BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! Interrupted, once again, by my mother. Aileen speeds out, needless to say.
We dont talk for a month and a half after that night. The morning after phone call wait was endless. She never called. The one who wanted all this commitment and security never calls, oh! wait. No, that's not right. She only calls when a friend of mine alerts her to my brief, if not frightening, hospital visit.
and time passes.
However, once the summer months started so did a shift in affections. She started responding more and we saw each other once on my sisters graduation day. Once again, I knew that when she sees me, and the ever-burning fire was set truly ablaze she would return my affections. As she did. She texts, just wishing me a good morning and fun day. Another, wishing we were laying together during the thunderstorm. This continues and then again! luck smiles upon us and we attened a party together.
This night I drive...to be continued
I knew her back when she was this shy little high school junior who just wanted to get the hell out of her small town and create her own life. She was ready upon ready to walk out the door and never look back. At that point we had already had many ups and downs but there was, as always, that nagging desire. She enters college the fall I starting dating Katie. Once again, we are interrupted. We lose contact for the standard few months and then circle back. First time, when I was with Jessica, and then, now again while I am with Katie.
I go through an intense year with Katie and as it would seem AIleen had a hard time with abusively controlling girlfriend. The summer of 06 rolls in and out with nothing much. Fall comes and she and I talk a bit more. It wasn't until I was just days away from leaving for Germany does it begin to get more serious.
The distance that Germany provided turned into a breeding ground for sweet nothings to be whispered in my ear. Promises, wishes, dreams were confided and plans were made for the night of my arrival.
I arrive home after 19+ hours of international travel and not only is she receiving me but so are all members of immideate family but also 4 seperate friends. It was a lot to take in but I tried my damndest to keep her comfortable, I even drove home with her! The night is a bit crazy with laughter, stories and take out pizza but as it calms down and I take a walk up to my room with Aileen.
Finally I am realizing all that I have fantasized. Finally I there in my bed with her. Everything was suppose to be the way was. It was all I wanted. BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! Interrupted, once again, by my mother. Aileen speeds out, needless to say.
We dont talk for a month and a half after that night. The morning after phone call wait was endless. She never called. The one who wanted all this commitment and security never calls, oh! wait. No, that's not right. She only calls when a friend of mine alerts her to my brief, if not frightening, hospital visit.
and time passes.
However, once the summer months started so did a shift in affections. She started responding more and we saw each other once on my sisters graduation day. Once again, I knew that when she sees me, and the ever-burning fire was set truly ablaze she would return my affections. As she did. She texts, just wishing me a good morning and fun day. Another, wishing we were laying together during the thunderstorm. This continues and then again! luck smiles upon us and we attened a party together.
This night I drive...to be continued