Eeeee!
Well, I have that interview today and I'm a bit nervous. What if I blow it? What if I suck at the job? What this? What that? Blah! Shut up brain!!!!!
The not smoking thing is going about as well as can be expected. I haven't stopped entirely, but I've cut down significantly. Seven or eight smokes a day is a definite improvement from 20 or more. I've got two cigarettes right now, and I already had two this morning. What with the interview and all I don't know if I'm going to be able to stop myself from buying any. The current rationale is that I don't want to be all nervous and shaky while I'm trying to get a job. Yay justification!!!
I really wish I had never, ever, ever, ever, ever, EVER started smoking! What the fucking shit was I thinking when I was 15?? Oh yeah, NOT MUCH. The funny thing is that I really, HONESTLY wasn't thinking about shit like how cool smoking was or any of that crap. I tried a cigarette because I was curious and my best friend at the time happened to have a pack. From that very first cigarette, I was hooked. Worse than any drug I have ever tried. And I've tried quite a lot.
Though, I did find out something interesting. I thought I had been doing a significant amount of actual damage to my vocal chords. Turns out the damage to the pipes is minimal. The only time you really fuck with your vocal chords by smoking is if you speak or sing WHILE EXHALING CIGARETTE SMOKE. I don't do that. I've NEVER done that. In fact, I hate it. Makes me feel like I'm choking. So the damage I've done to myself is mostly limited to lungs, heart, and stuff like that. I've done more bad shit to my voice working at the haunted house than by smoking. Not that that's going to stop me from quitting, it's just good to know that I haven't totally fucked myself.
That's all for now. Nerves are starting to kick in with a vengeance. Must. Not. Go. Buy. Marlboros.
The not smoking thing is going about as well as can be expected. I haven't stopped entirely, but I've cut down significantly. Seven or eight smokes a day is a definite improvement from 20 or more. I've got two cigarettes right now, and I already had two this morning. What with the interview and all I don't know if I'm going to be able to stop myself from buying any. The current rationale is that I don't want to be all nervous and shaky while I'm trying to get a job. Yay justification!!!
I really wish I had never, ever, ever, ever, ever, EVER started smoking! What the fucking shit was I thinking when I was 15?? Oh yeah, NOT MUCH. The funny thing is that I really, HONESTLY wasn't thinking about shit like how cool smoking was or any of that crap. I tried a cigarette because I was curious and my best friend at the time happened to have a pack. From that very first cigarette, I was hooked. Worse than any drug I have ever tried. And I've tried quite a lot.
Though, I did find out something interesting. I thought I had been doing a significant amount of actual damage to my vocal chords. Turns out the damage to the pipes is minimal. The only time you really fuck with your vocal chords by smoking is if you speak or sing WHILE EXHALING CIGARETTE SMOKE. I don't do that. I've NEVER done that. In fact, I hate it. Makes me feel like I'm choking. So the damage I've done to myself is mostly limited to lungs, heart, and stuff like that. I've done more bad shit to my voice working at the haunted house than by smoking. Not that that's going to stop me from quitting, it's just good to know that I haven't totally fucked myself.
That's all for now. Nerves are starting to kick in with a vengeance. Must. Not. Go. Buy. Marlboros.