(no subject)
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY.
Well, it was my birthday, like eleven minutes ago. It's not anymore.
I am now a 26 year old lady, which is not old old old, but it isn't a time of my life that I've ever bothered to imagine.
Truth be told, I don't really try to conjure up images of the future too often. I know I talk time to time about feeling stagnated in my current non-trajectory, but I'm as much to blame, because as I've also probably complained before, I lack any ambition.
Right now I am okay with that. I am drunk. I also have plans in my mind. Well. I really want to go to Iceland. So I think to myself, "I need to plan to do that." I've never planned an international trip for myself before, though, so I feel a little loss as to how that happens.
I am in the process of resigning myself to the fact that this is a trip I will take alone, so I'm trying to get myself in a place where I've decided "this is when I'm going, this what I will do, this is what I will make happen" and then remind myself to work toward that. Like I complained about before, I need solid goals, and not just abstract desires.
I also have this problem of like, fearing I don't have enough money saved up? I think it's partly that 1. I've gotten a little loose with my money and feel a little like I'm hemorrhaging it, and also partly that as an intrinsically stingy person, I don't want to feel like I didn't set enough money aside to for something big (like an international trip). I don't want to be like "wow, I did this great thing, and now I'm broke D:"
Anyway that's some shit that's bouncing around in my head.
Otherwise I'm in a very good place. I'm hoping that I've kicked my December Depression to the curb. Last year I was pretty aware that it was connected to my birthday. I couldn't tell you WHY it was, but I know that was it. This year I really didn't get it. But I felt normal yesterday (in a state of malaise, but that's normal), and I felt pretty damn great today even though I did almost nothing of note.
Corey and I went out to eat at Geraldine's, which is a diner that I infrequently visit but enjoy. After that I went out for a doctor-prescribed walk. When I got home I played Rhythm Heaven until I got fed-up with a particular level, and I ended up washing dishes to get ready to heat up some dinner.
Elisabeth called me during that time. I hadn't talked to her since August. She talked and talked and talked. I can't really hold it against her, though. If there's one thing you must know about Elisabeth, it's that she tries to be the best friend she can. I do hope things work for her.
I forgot where I was going with this because my brother called me.
In other news, my sister's husband has filed for divorce. I got two gifts from Monique, and I've got a mystery box waiting for me at the post office. I have dreams about Kit Harington from time to time. I had another teeth-getting-loose-and-possibly-falling-out dream. I have a bar of chocolate full of spicy things and I might try and square before I go to bed. I emailed someone on Craig's List about an apartment in Wallingford. I have to pee. This is the end of my Sunday night.
omg Kit Harington is two years younger than me. Oh, well, I still want to run my fingers through his hair. This is how I know I'm not a total sexual vegetable, people.
IMDb really should have a picture of him smiling and like, in normal clothes. All the photos they have of him make him look more manikin like than he actual does in motion.
Well, it was my birthday, like eleven minutes ago. It's not anymore.
I am now a 26 year old lady, which is not old old old, but it isn't a time of my life that I've ever bothered to imagine.
Truth be told, I don't really try to conjure up images of the future too often. I know I talk time to time about feeling stagnated in my current non-trajectory, but I'm as much to blame, because as I've also probably complained before, I lack any ambition.
Right now I am okay with that. I am drunk. I also have plans in my mind. Well. I really want to go to Iceland. So I think to myself, "I need to plan to do that." I've never planned an international trip for myself before, though, so I feel a little loss as to how that happens.
I am in the process of resigning myself to the fact that this is a trip I will take alone, so I'm trying to get myself in a place where I've decided "this is when I'm going, this what I will do, this is what I will make happen" and then remind myself to work toward that. Like I complained about before, I need solid goals, and not just abstract desires.
I also have this problem of like, fearing I don't have enough money saved up? I think it's partly that 1. I've gotten a little loose with my money and feel a little like I'm hemorrhaging it, and also partly that as an intrinsically stingy person, I don't want to feel like I didn't set enough money aside to for something big (like an international trip). I don't want to be like "wow, I did this great thing, and now I'm broke D:"
Anyway that's some shit that's bouncing around in my head.
Otherwise I'm in a very good place. I'm hoping that I've kicked my December Depression to the curb. Last year I was pretty aware that it was connected to my birthday. I couldn't tell you WHY it was, but I know that was it. This year I really didn't get it. But I felt normal yesterday (in a state of malaise, but that's normal), and I felt pretty damn great today even though I did almost nothing of note.
Corey and I went out to eat at Geraldine's, which is a diner that I infrequently visit but enjoy. After that I went out for a doctor-prescribed walk. When I got home I played Rhythm Heaven until I got fed-up with a particular level, and I ended up washing dishes to get ready to heat up some dinner.
Elisabeth called me during that time. I hadn't talked to her since August. She talked and talked and talked. I can't really hold it against her, though. If there's one thing you must know about Elisabeth, it's that she tries to be the best friend she can. I do hope things work for her.
I forgot where I was going with this because my brother called me.
In other news, my sister's husband has filed for divorce. I got two gifts from Monique, and I've got a mystery box waiting for me at the post office. I have dreams about Kit Harington from time to time. I had another teeth-getting-loose-and-possibly-falling-out dream. I have a bar of chocolate full of spicy things and I might try and square before I go to bed. I emailed someone on Craig's List about an apartment in Wallingford. I have to pee. This is the end of my Sunday night.
omg Kit Harington is two years younger than me. Oh, well, I still want to run my fingers through his hair. This is how I know I'm not a total sexual vegetable, people.
IMDb really should have a picture of him smiling and like, in normal clothes. All the photos they have of him make him look more manikin like than he actual does in motion.