Aishiteiru, Goshujinsama - Ch. 2/?
I hooked you all and then proceeded to jump off the face of the earth for a while... such is my way >.> Thank you all for being patient. I was very happy with the interest you all expressed. B/c of the nature of this fic, I was a bit hesitant to post it, but I'm glad you all seem to like it ^-^
Random Trivia: I wrote most of this while listening to the Inception soundtrack song "time". a very epic, very emotional piece. Add some more angst spice to your reading if you dare ;D
---
2. Curry, Peas, and Eggs
A slave boy. Nino was now the proud owner of a slave boy. Oh, this was illegal on so, so many levels. And just what did Jun expect him to do with-
Scratch that. He knew exactly what Jun expected him to do. And there was no way Nino was doing that. No way, no how. That would be worse than force-feeding him deep-fried kittens…
But, well, Nino couldn’t just leave the man kneeling on his floor all day. Or…night. Yes, it was almost dinner time. He inched his way back to the foyer.
“Are you hungry?”
No answer. Had he heard? Well, he supposed that was a stupid question-the man was less than a meter from him. And he could have sworn the man’s head raised maybe a centimeter at the mention of food, but he couldn’t be sure.
“Ohno…Satoshi?” He paused. It was a cute name. He’d always liked that name, all the way back to primary school when he’d had a crush on a boy with that same name. He wondered if it was spelt with the same characters.
“Can I call you Satoshi?” He took the silence as a yes and decided to go back to his previous inquiry.
“Have you eaten?”
The man gave the slightest shake of his head. Despite his nose still being glued to the floor, Nino grinned, glad he had gotten something of a reaction.
“Neither have I. Been asleep all day…”
Really? Was he really reverting to small talk here?
“I have some leftover curry. We can have that, ok?”
No movement from the man on the ground. If Nino didn’t know any better, he’d say that the man was deep in prayer. But Nino knew that he was merely being submissive to his new ‘master’. He had read enough of Jun’s dirty SM books to know that much.
His attention shifted to the man’s wrists. They were still bound (well, of course they were-he hadn’t moved. What did he expect, for them to disappear?) Nino knelt down to him, and moved to take Ohno’s hands in his. The man pulled them back, head jerking up at the contact. There was a startled look in his eyes.
Nino dropped his grip in surprise. The man’s reaction to his touch had been almost electric, as if Nino had struck him instead. He now hugged his hands to his chest protectively, the muscles in his arms rigid.
“Uh…I was gonna…here,” Nino gestured for the man’s hands. “Let me help.”
Cautiously, the man extended his arms. As soon as Nino placed his fingers around the man’s wrists, he began to tremble, as if his touch was too much to bear.
Nino ignored it for the time being, and worked at undoing the rope around the smaller man’s forearms. In a few short moments the rope slipped off and the man’s hands came apart. Nino held them lightly, palms up in his, staring guiltily at the marks on his wrists. He knew it wasn’t his fault, but somehow he still felt it was.
That and the man’s quaking hadn’t subsided. Nino let Ohno’s thin wrists slip through his fingers. This man’s irrational fear of him made him uneasy…made him feel criminal. He felt dirty, as if taking on the responsibility of this man was also taking on the responsibility of what he’d seen that monster do to him…and all the things he could imagine he’d done to him in the past.
Though he wasn’t touching the man any longer, the tension between them was still heavy in the air. The hairs on the back of Nino’s neck prickled it was so strong.
He stood up and backed away.
“Um, the…the curry…I’ll go heat it up.”
He moved quickly into the kitchen, anything to escape the man in the other room. He would follow in due time.
Except that when the microwave announced it was done, he was still alone in the kitchen. He stuck his head out into the living room, wondering what was taking the other so long. He was still on the floor, in exactly the way Nino had left him, kneeling with his hands raised defensively to his chest.
He seemed unsure of what to do. He was looking around, taking in his surroundings with wide eyes. He resembled, as best as Nino could put it, a frightened deer caught in the middle of a freeway. Of a sudden, he began to pant quickly, as if he was having trouble breathing. His eyes squeezed shut and he cringed, dropping to all fours. His head bowed, his shoulders tensed together. He took a shallow breath, held it for a few seconds, and then let it out with a whimper.
It was then that Nino realized what was happening. He rushed back into the kitchen and threw open the freezer door, taking whatever he happened to lay hands on first. Fortunately it turned out to be a bag of peas and not the ice cream carton right next to it. He jogged back to the foyer.
Still, he was afraid to touch this man again. He was obviously in pain, and Nino wanted to help, but…even more so he didn’t want his good intention to be rejected again.
“Ah…p-peas…” he stuttered. The man scooted back into a kneeling position, looking at Nino with wide eyes. There was that look again-that of sheer terror. Nino held the bag out to him, gesturing for him to take it. He did, slowly, but did no more than that--he merely held it and stared, as if he couldn’t understand its purpose.
“For your side.”
When he didn’t move, Nino got a bit bolder. He took the peas back and gingerly pressed them to the man’s ribs, where the monster from before had kicked him.
“It hurts, right?”
Bashfully, the man bowed his head.
“Ah, it’s okay if it does…you don’t have to be sorry…” Nino trailed off, realizing how ridiculous he sounded, but started again regardless. “I mean, it’s not your fault…right?”
There was an uncomfortable silence. Nino held the makeshift compress to the man’s side, trying to both keep the contact and be as far away as he could get. A minute of this, however, and the silence was driving Nino nuts.
“Ah…so my friend…ah, Jun, that is…ah…well, for my birthday, he got me…ahhh…”
Failing at making small talk (he found the mere mention of the topic incredibly embarrassing), he changed the subject.
“Ah, right, so…dinner’s ready…it’s only leftovers, but…well, my mom made it, so it’s not anything, like…poisonous. I mean, I can cook…”
Nino let out a nervous laugh and took the peas away, gesturing awkwardly for Ohno to hold them himself.
“So, ok, dinner. Kitchen.” He pointed in the direction of the kitchen and shuffled away, a tortured look on his face. This man was really too hard to be around.
Slowly, and only after Nino waved for him to come, Ohno rose and followed him into the kitchen. Nino motioned for him to sit and then set a steaming bowl of curry rice in front of him.
“Would you like an egg?” he asked. He didn’t really expect a reply, and didn’t receive one. “It’s good, see?” He cracked an egg on his. The man watched, but made no indication that he was interested. “Do you want one?” Nino asked again.
There was the slightest tilt of the man’s head-the beginning of a nod, it seemed-but the man froze before he could complete it. Odd, Nino thought to himself. Briefly he wondered if wanting was taboo in this sort of ownership. From how that monster had treated this man…it didn’t seem all too surprising. And like it or not, he was now-at least to this man-the substitute ‘monster’. He probably didn’t know what to expect…or rather, thought he knew was to expect but was confused because Nino wasn’t actually…fulfilling those expectations. And he had no intention to.
Either way, he decided to take Ohno’s not-nod as a yes. It would be good for him, he decided-the man was skin and bones. He could use the extra nutrition.
“Here.” Nino cracked the egg for him. The man watched as it plopped onto his dish. “And then you mix it up like this-” Nino demonstrated with his own and took a bite. “It’s good this way.”
He was more-or-less talking just to ease the other’s oppressing silence. In fact, he wasn’t even sure why he was teaching the man how to mix an egg into his curry rice. He wasn’t a child, Nino chided himself. Yet why did he get the impression that this man-this grown man-had never eaten eggs with his rice?
Whether he had or not, Ohno made no indication. Obediently, he picked up his spoon, swirled the egg around, and took a bite.
“Mm…” He had started to say something, but stopped himself, again, like the nod.
“What was that?”
The man shook his head fervently, denying that he had made a noise.
“It’s ok, you can say it. I won’t bite.” Nino chuckled nervously at his joke, wondering if a similar punishment had once been a reality for this one. For some reason it didn’t seem all that ludicrous.
Hesitantly, the man looked up. Unsure eyes met his for the first time. They were pretty, those eyes, unlike anything Nino had ever seen. Deep, deep brown, and in their midst was evidence of a dark, tormented past.
Nino nodded at the man, whose eyes asked permission to speak.
“U…umai…”
Nino beamed. The word, though mumbled as softly as humanly possible, betrayed the man’s utter pleasure at having warm, cooked food. Emotion burned in Nino’s throat. Now he really did believe that this man was half-starved.
“I--*ahem* I’m glad you like it.” He smiled, as warmly as he could. “My mom will be happy.”
“U…Umai…”
Nino supposed that meant some form of thank you.
As Nino scooped up the last bite, new panic came into the man’s eyes. He glanced around the kitchen fervently, eyes finally resting on the sink. Though his meal wasn’t finished, he stood bolt upright and hurried to collect Nino’s dish.
“Oh, no, it’s ok.” At ‘no’ the man froze. His eyes grew wide, asking what he’d done wrong.
“I’ll do them later. You can finish.” The man glanced back at his ‘umai’ curry, then shook his head fervently. “Well, ok… Later then.”
Perhaps it was better not to argue with the man. Nino wrapped his dish up and set it in the fridge, and then tossed his dirty dishes in the sink. He watched Ohno carefully as he did, and found the man’s eyes meticulously following everything he did. Nino wondered if he was trying to learn exactly what his future role here would entail.
Nino sighed. This would take some definite getting used to.
Ordering someone around all day? Sitting back as he was catered to every moment of every minute? In any other situation it wouldn’t sound half bad, and he had to admit, he had found himself wishing such a thing in the past when he was feeling extremely lazy, but now…this one’s utter attentiveness and fragility scared him.
He didn’t want to boss this man around, nor sit idly by while the man cooked his meals and cleaned his apartment. He wanted…he wasn’t exactly sure what. To have the man react properly when he drew near, and not jump as if he was about to hit him, in the least. No, he wanted more than that. To rescue him? To heal him? To show him that the world still held some light in it for him? That he could be free, if only he had the means?
Was it even possible?
“Uh, well…how about a tour?” he suggested. Anything-anything to break the silence. “Uh, it’s kinda small…not much to show. You already saw the living room/foyer and the kitchen…” Nino moved into the next room, motioning to be followed. “This is the bedroom and the bathroom is through there…”
Nino trailed off and turned back. The man had stopped in the middle of the bedroom, shoulders shaking violently. An unpleasant knot twisted in Nino’s gut, even though he didn’t understand the reaction. Was it the bedroom? The bed? He wasn’t sure.
“Uh…would you like a bath?” The man stopped shaking at once and glanced up. Nino smiled at him, glad to have pulled his attention away from whatever was plaguing him.
“I’m sure you could use one…” Get that monster’s stench off you, he thought, but he wasn’t sure if the insult would upset the man, so he kept his mouth shut. “I’ll wash your hair for you, if you like.”
Ohno looked away, a strange shadow passing over his eyes. Was he embarrassed? Ashamed? Nino wasn’t sure. It didn’t make any sense to him.
“Uh…it’s through here…”
Nino guided him into the bathroom and then set to work unbuttoning the man’s shirt. He didn’t even know why he did this-he just started on it instinctively. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that this man barely reacted to anything he said. Indeed, he acted more like a living doll than a man.
The shirt fit him horribly. It was way too big and badly stained, and the fabric was so thin…how long had he worn this? Was it his only one? Nino didn’t put anything past that monster he’d met earlier.
The shirt finally off, Nino gasped. The curry he’d just eaten came rushing up his throat, and he had to clamp a hand over his mouth and turn away to keep it down. His eyes teared at the effort, and no matter how tightly he squeezed them shut, he could not get the image out of his mind.
Bruises-dozens of them-splattered across the man’s torso, arms, neck...there was hardly a piece of skin not somehow tainted in black and blue. The newest blow, which Nino had seen delivered, was a sickly red in the middle. Internal bleeding? It could be. That monster hadn’t exactly held back. And from what it looked like, this man had been his personal soccer ball for a number of years.
Nino forced his eyes open and steeled his stomach as he turned the man around to look at his back. Almost immediately, the nausea returned, and this time Nino could not fight it. He dashed to the sink, just barely making it in time.
He breathed heavily, trying to calm himself by splashing some cold water on his face. Damn that monster. Damn him all to hell. How could he have…how did he justify this? As if the bruises weren’t bad enough…whip lashings? The scabs on the man’s back were crisscrossed like lattice work…brutally red-stained lattice work. How…how did such a human even exist?
He glanced back to the man sitting on the bathroom stool, waiting patiently for him to return. His eyes read fear and unease, like he couldn’t understand his new master’s reaction to his flesh.
Or could he? His eyes briefly met Nino’s and then looked away. Ashamed? He was trembling again. God, all he wanted to do was…
“Shh…it’s alright…” Nino had no recollection of crossing the room and drawing the man’s head to his chest. It was as if he blinked and reawakened like this. He wasn’t even sure if he was helping him, touching him as he was... But his need to show this man just the tiniest bit of kindness…it was overwhelming.
“No one’s going to hurt you anymore, I promise. Shhh, it’s okay now…”
The trembling increased. He was like a duel shock controller, this one. The only difference was that in video games, Nino knew when to expect his consol to react.
He let go of the man slowly, stomach still queasy at the sight of him. He had to do something about all these injuries. Should he take him to a hospital? No, they would surely ask questions. Besides…he was sure that being grabbed at by a bunch of strangers would only upset the man more. Not that he wasn’t a stranger, but…at least he had a trace of an understanding of what Ohno had been through. And whether he liked it or not, he was now this man’s master. Ohno wouldn’t fight him, no matter what he did. Though the thought made him sick, he had to acknowledge that, take responsibility for it. It was his duty as a master to take care of this man.
“Hold on, ok? I think I have…” He left the man for a brief moment to rifle through the medicine cabinet. He returned with the first aid kit and a box of cold compresses.
“This is gonna sting a little,” he warned. He dabbed at the fresher cuts on Ohno’s back with antiseptic, trying to stem the guilt he felt at causing him even the slightest bit of pain. Though, in comparison…Nino wondered if he could even feel it.
In less than half an hour, Ohno was bandaged, and the compresses were jig-sawed across his chest, doing their thing. Nino had also finished undressing the man and checking his lower half for bruises, and placing the last few precious compresses on the darkest of them. When he was freshly dressed in pjs, he led his patient out of the bathroom. He had wiped him down as best as he could while doctoring him, but was afraid the hot water would irritate his wounds and so had gone no further than that. He could bathe properly when he was healed.
Two steps into the bedroom, the man slowed. His trembling started up again, even more violently than before. Nino’s previous curiosity returned, this time with an answer. It was this place. It had to be. The fear in the man’s eyes as they fixated on the bed…
What had that monster said? That he was good for “maybe a fuck or two”? The memory of it made his previous nausea return. Nino wouldn’t put it past the man to have raped this poor soul senseless whenever he was feeling horny. Forget horny-whenever he felt like abusing his slave. Which, by the look of him, seemed to be all the time. Had this man seen one peaceful moment in his horrid life? Had he ever slept with the gift of conviction?
Damn it all, he would tonight. Nino didn’t care if he was afraid of beds. He was sleeping in one, like a normal human being would, whether it scared the shit out of him or not. Nino had meant to have him sleep on the couch, but…damn it, no way was he spending the night on that lumpy, rock-hard, good-for-nothing-but-a-backache sofa-not after this!
Gently, yet willfully, Nino pulled the man over to the bed, ignoring it as his tremors increased. He pulled back the covers, set him between the sheets, and then pulled them up to his chin. He then smoothed the covers, finishing the tucking-in process. The cloth vibrated under his fingertips, the man under it rigid. His shaking seemed endless…
“Sleep,” Nino urged him, his voice hushed, “I’m right here. I’m not gonna hurt you.”
The man’s eyes flickered up to his, to see if the words were true. Nino smiled warmly, and brushed the hair from them.
“I mean it. I would never lie to you.”
Hesitantly, nervously, Ohno closed his eyes. It took a long time, in which Nino uttered reassuring nonsense, all the while patting his head as if he was a child, not a man. Eventually, his body relaxed and his breathing deepened in sleep. Nino continued to play with his hair, marveling at the beauty of him. Indeed, despite the horrific bruises covering him from head to toe, he was, unmistakably, beautiful. His face especially, especially when it was so unguarded in sleep, was like that of an angel’s.
An angel such as this did not deserve the hell he had been thrown into. And now that he was under Nino’s charge…Nino would do whatever it took to restore his wings. His friend hadn’t given him a slave, he realized, but a cause. Out of months of depriving himself of love and wallowing in his misfortune, in the betrayal that his previous boyfriend had dumped on him (upon dumping him), his friend had thrust purpose back into his life. A reason to love again. He hadn’t thought…he never thought it could happen.
But this man. This man needed him. Needed his love. It was his duty-as a master-to give it to him.
Even if it was painful for him-even if it brought back bittersweet memories-Nino would try. Regardless of how badly he wanted to just curl up and brood the rest of his life away-he would try. Surely this man would appreciate his help, in ways that Koichi never could.
Nino would show him love. He would.
---
Next Chapter
Random Trivia: I wrote most of this while listening to the Inception soundtrack song "time". a very epic, very emotional piece. Add some more angst spice to your reading if you dare ;D
---
2. Curry, Peas, and Eggs
A slave boy. Nino was now the proud owner of a slave boy. Oh, this was illegal on so, so many levels. And just what did Jun expect him to do with-
Scratch that. He knew exactly what Jun expected him to do. And there was no way Nino was doing that. No way, no how. That would be worse than force-feeding him deep-fried kittens…
But, well, Nino couldn’t just leave the man kneeling on his floor all day. Or…night. Yes, it was almost dinner time. He inched his way back to the foyer.
“Are you hungry?”
No answer. Had he heard? Well, he supposed that was a stupid question-the man was less than a meter from him. And he could have sworn the man’s head raised maybe a centimeter at the mention of food, but he couldn’t be sure.
“Ohno…Satoshi?” He paused. It was a cute name. He’d always liked that name, all the way back to primary school when he’d had a crush on a boy with that same name. He wondered if it was spelt with the same characters.
“Can I call you Satoshi?” He took the silence as a yes and decided to go back to his previous inquiry.
“Have you eaten?”
The man gave the slightest shake of his head. Despite his nose still being glued to the floor, Nino grinned, glad he had gotten something of a reaction.
“Neither have I. Been asleep all day…”
Really? Was he really reverting to small talk here?
“I have some leftover curry. We can have that, ok?”
No movement from the man on the ground. If Nino didn’t know any better, he’d say that the man was deep in prayer. But Nino knew that he was merely being submissive to his new ‘master’. He had read enough of Jun’s dirty SM books to know that much.
His attention shifted to the man’s wrists. They were still bound (well, of course they were-he hadn’t moved. What did he expect, for them to disappear?) Nino knelt down to him, and moved to take Ohno’s hands in his. The man pulled them back, head jerking up at the contact. There was a startled look in his eyes.
Nino dropped his grip in surprise. The man’s reaction to his touch had been almost electric, as if Nino had struck him instead. He now hugged his hands to his chest protectively, the muscles in his arms rigid.
“Uh…I was gonna…here,” Nino gestured for the man’s hands. “Let me help.”
Cautiously, the man extended his arms. As soon as Nino placed his fingers around the man’s wrists, he began to tremble, as if his touch was too much to bear.
Nino ignored it for the time being, and worked at undoing the rope around the smaller man’s forearms. In a few short moments the rope slipped off and the man’s hands came apart. Nino held them lightly, palms up in his, staring guiltily at the marks on his wrists. He knew it wasn’t his fault, but somehow he still felt it was.
That and the man’s quaking hadn’t subsided. Nino let Ohno’s thin wrists slip through his fingers. This man’s irrational fear of him made him uneasy…made him feel criminal. He felt dirty, as if taking on the responsibility of this man was also taking on the responsibility of what he’d seen that monster do to him…and all the things he could imagine he’d done to him in the past.
Though he wasn’t touching the man any longer, the tension between them was still heavy in the air. The hairs on the back of Nino’s neck prickled it was so strong.
He stood up and backed away.
“Um, the…the curry…I’ll go heat it up.”
He moved quickly into the kitchen, anything to escape the man in the other room. He would follow in due time.
Except that when the microwave announced it was done, he was still alone in the kitchen. He stuck his head out into the living room, wondering what was taking the other so long. He was still on the floor, in exactly the way Nino had left him, kneeling with his hands raised defensively to his chest.
He seemed unsure of what to do. He was looking around, taking in his surroundings with wide eyes. He resembled, as best as Nino could put it, a frightened deer caught in the middle of a freeway. Of a sudden, he began to pant quickly, as if he was having trouble breathing. His eyes squeezed shut and he cringed, dropping to all fours. His head bowed, his shoulders tensed together. He took a shallow breath, held it for a few seconds, and then let it out with a whimper.
It was then that Nino realized what was happening. He rushed back into the kitchen and threw open the freezer door, taking whatever he happened to lay hands on first. Fortunately it turned out to be a bag of peas and not the ice cream carton right next to it. He jogged back to the foyer.
Still, he was afraid to touch this man again. He was obviously in pain, and Nino wanted to help, but…even more so he didn’t want his good intention to be rejected again.
“Ah…p-peas…” he stuttered. The man scooted back into a kneeling position, looking at Nino with wide eyes. There was that look again-that of sheer terror. Nino held the bag out to him, gesturing for him to take it. He did, slowly, but did no more than that--he merely held it and stared, as if he couldn’t understand its purpose.
“For your side.”
When he didn’t move, Nino got a bit bolder. He took the peas back and gingerly pressed them to the man’s ribs, where the monster from before had kicked him.
“It hurts, right?”
Bashfully, the man bowed his head.
“Ah, it’s okay if it does…you don’t have to be sorry…” Nino trailed off, realizing how ridiculous he sounded, but started again regardless. “I mean, it’s not your fault…right?”
There was an uncomfortable silence. Nino held the makeshift compress to the man’s side, trying to both keep the contact and be as far away as he could get. A minute of this, however, and the silence was driving Nino nuts.
“Ah…so my friend…ah, Jun, that is…ah…well, for my birthday, he got me…ahhh…”
Failing at making small talk (he found the mere mention of the topic incredibly embarrassing), he changed the subject.
“Ah, right, so…dinner’s ready…it’s only leftovers, but…well, my mom made it, so it’s not anything, like…poisonous. I mean, I can cook…”
Nino let out a nervous laugh and took the peas away, gesturing awkwardly for Ohno to hold them himself.
“So, ok, dinner. Kitchen.” He pointed in the direction of the kitchen and shuffled away, a tortured look on his face. This man was really too hard to be around.
Slowly, and only after Nino waved for him to come, Ohno rose and followed him into the kitchen. Nino motioned for him to sit and then set a steaming bowl of curry rice in front of him.
“Would you like an egg?” he asked. He didn’t really expect a reply, and didn’t receive one. “It’s good, see?” He cracked an egg on his. The man watched, but made no indication that he was interested. “Do you want one?” Nino asked again.
There was the slightest tilt of the man’s head-the beginning of a nod, it seemed-but the man froze before he could complete it. Odd, Nino thought to himself. Briefly he wondered if wanting was taboo in this sort of ownership. From how that monster had treated this man…it didn’t seem all too surprising. And like it or not, he was now-at least to this man-the substitute ‘monster’. He probably didn’t know what to expect…or rather, thought he knew was to expect but was confused because Nino wasn’t actually…fulfilling those expectations. And he had no intention to.
Either way, he decided to take Ohno’s not-nod as a yes. It would be good for him, he decided-the man was skin and bones. He could use the extra nutrition.
“Here.” Nino cracked the egg for him. The man watched as it plopped onto his dish. “And then you mix it up like this-” Nino demonstrated with his own and took a bite. “It’s good this way.”
He was more-or-less talking just to ease the other’s oppressing silence. In fact, he wasn’t even sure why he was teaching the man how to mix an egg into his curry rice. He wasn’t a child, Nino chided himself. Yet why did he get the impression that this man-this grown man-had never eaten eggs with his rice?
Whether he had or not, Ohno made no indication. Obediently, he picked up his spoon, swirled the egg around, and took a bite.
“Mm…” He had started to say something, but stopped himself, again, like the nod.
“What was that?”
The man shook his head fervently, denying that he had made a noise.
“It’s ok, you can say it. I won’t bite.” Nino chuckled nervously at his joke, wondering if a similar punishment had once been a reality for this one. For some reason it didn’t seem all that ludicrous.
Hesitantly, the man looked up. Unsure eyes met his for the first time. They were pretty, those eyes, unlike anything Nino had ever seen. Deep, deep brown, and in their midst was evidence of a dark, tormented past.
Nino nodded at the man, whose eyes asked permission to speak.
“U…umai…”
Nino beamed. The word, though mumbled as softly as humanly possible, betrayed the man’s utter pleasure at having warm, cooked food. Emotion burned in Nino’s throat. Now he really did believe that this man was half-starved.
“I--*ahem* I’m glad you like it.” He smiled, as warmly as he could. “My mom will be happy.”
“U…Umai…”
Nino supposed that meant some form of thank you.
As Nino scooped up the last bite, new panic came into the man’s eyes. He glanced around the kitchen fervently, eyes finally resting on the sink. Though his meal wasn’t finished, he stood bolt upright and hurried to collect Nino’s dish.
“Oh, no, it’s ok.” At ‘no’ the man froze. His eyes grew wide, asking what he’d done wrong.
“I’ll do them later. You can finish.” The man glanced back at his ‘umai’ curry, then shook his head fervently. “Well, ok… Later then.”
Perhaps it was better not to argue with the man. Nino wrapped his dish up and set it in the fridge, and then tossed his dirty dishes in the sink. He watched Ohno carefully as he did, and found the man’s eyes meticulously following everything he did. Nino wondered if he was trying to learn exactly what his future role here would entail.
Nino sighed. This would take some definite getting used to.
Ordering someone around all day? Sitting back as he was catered to every moment of every minute? In any other situation it wouldn’t sound half bad, and he had to admit, he had found himself wishing such a thing in the past when he was feeling extremely lazy, but now…this one’s utter attentiveness and fragility scared him.
He didn’t want to boss this man around, nor sit idly by while the man cooked his meals and cleaned his apartment. He wanted…he wasn’t exactly sure what. To have the man react properly when he drew near, and not jump as if he was about to hit him, in the least. No, he wanted more than that. To rescue him? To heal him? To show him that the world still held some light in it for him? That he could be free, if only he had the means?
Was it even possible?
“Uh, well…how about a tour?” he suggested. Anything-anything to break the silence. “Uh, it’s kinda small…not much to show. You already saw the living room/foyer and the kitchen…” Nino moved into the next room, motioning to be followed. “This is the bedroom and the bathroom is through there…”
Nino trailed off and turned back. The man had stopped in the middle of the bedroom, shoulders shaking violently. An unpleasant knot twisted in Nino’s gut, even though he didn’t understand the reaction. Was it the bedroom? The bed? He wasn’t sure.
“Uh…would you like a bath?” The man stopped shaking at once and glanced up. Nino smiled at him, glad to have pulled his attention away from whatever was plaguing him.
“I’m sure you could use one…” Get that monster’s stench off you, he thought, but he wasn’t sure if the insult would upset the man, so he kept his mouth shut. “I’ll wash your hair for you, if you like.”
Ohno looked away, a strange shadow passing over his eyes. Was he embarrassed? Ashamed? Nino wasn’t sure. It didn’t make any sense to him.
“Uh…it’s through here…”
Nino guided him into the bathroom and then set to work unbuttoning the man’s shirt. He didn’t even know why he did this-he just started on it instinctively. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that this man barely reacted to anything he said. Indeed, he acted more like a living doll than a man.
The shirt fit him horribly. It was way too big and badly stained, and the fabric was so thin…how long had he worn this? Was it his only one? Nino didn’t put anything past that monster he’d met earlier.
The shirt finally off, Nino gasped. The curry he’d just eaten came rushing up his throat, and he had to clamp a hand over his mouth and turn away to keep it down. His eyes teared at the effort, and no matter how tightly he squeezed them shut, he could not get the image out of his mind.
Bruises-dozens of them-splattered across the man’s torso, arms, neck...there was hardly a piece of skin not somehow tainted in black and blue. The newest blow, which Nino had seen delivered, was a sickly red in the middle. Internal bleeding? It could be. That monster hadn’t exactly held back. And from what it looked like, this man had been his personal soccer ball for a number of years.
Nino forced his eyes open and steeled his stomach as he turned the man around to look at his back. Almost immediately, the nausea returned, and this time Nino could not fight it. He dashed to the sink, just barely making it in time.
He breathed heavily, trying to calm himself by splashing some cold water on his face. Damn that monster. Damn him all to hell. How could he have…how did he justify this? As if the bruises weren’t bad enough…whip lashings? The scabs on the man’s back were crisscrossed like lattice work…brutally red-stained lattice work. How…how did such a human even exist?
He glanced back to the man sitting on the bathroom stool, waiting patiently for him to return. His eyes read fear and unease, like he couldn’t understand his new master’s reaction to his flesh.
Or could he? His eyes briefly met Nino’s and then looked away. Ashamed? He was trembling again. God, all he wanted to do was…
“Shh…it’s alright…” Nino had no recollection of crossing the room and drawing the man’s head to his chest. It was as if he blinked and reawakened like this. He wasn’t even sure if he was helping him, touching him as he was... But his need to show this man just the tiniest bit of kindness…it was overwhelming.
“No one’s going to hurt you anymore, I promise. Shhh, it’s okay now…”
The trembling increased. He was like a duel shock controller, this one. The only difference was that in video games, Nino knew when to expect his consol to react.
He let go of the man slowly, stomach still queasy at the sight of him. He had to do something about all these injuries. Should he take him to a hospital? No, they would surely ask questions. Besides…he was sure that being grabbed at by a bunch of strangers would only upset the man more. Not that he wasn’t a stranger, but…at least he had a trace of an understanding of what Ohno had been through. And whether he liked it or not, he was now this man’s master. Ohno wouldn’t fight him, no matter what he did. Though the thought made him sick, he had to acknowledge that, take responsibility for it. It was his duty as a master to take care of this man.
“Hold on, ok? I think I have…” He left the man for a brief moment to rifle through the medicine cabinet. He returned with the first aid kit and a box of cold compresses.
“This is gonna sting a little,” he warned. He dabbed at the fresher cuts on Ohno’s back with antiseptic, trying to stem the guilt he felt at causing him even the slightest bit of pain. Though, in comparison…Nino wondered if he could even feel it.
In less than half an hour, Ohno was bandaged, and the compresses were jig-sawed across his chest, doing their thing. Nino had also finished undressing the man and checking his lower half for bruises, and placing the last few precious compresses on the darkest of them. When he was freshly dressed in pjs, he led his patient out of the bathroom. He had wiped him down as best as he could while doctoring him, but was afraid the hot water would irritate his wounds and so had gone no further than that. He could bathe properly when he was healed.
Two steps into the bedroom, the man slowed. His trembling started up again, even more violently than before. Nino’s previous curiosity returned, this time with an answer. It was this place. It had to be. The fear in the man’s eyes as they fixated on the bed…
What had that monster said? That he was good for “maybe a fuck or two”? The memory of it made his previous nausea return. Nino wouldn’t put it past the man to have raped this poor soul senseless whenever he was feeling horny. Forget horny-whenever he felt like abusing his slave. Which, by the look of him, seemed to be all the time. Had this man seen one peaceful moment in his horrid life? Had he ever slept with the gift of conviction?
Damn it all, he would tonight. Nino didn’t care if he was afraid of beds. He was sleeping in one, like a normal human being would, whether it scared the shit out of him or not. Nino had meant to have him sleep on the couch, but…damn it, no way was he spending the night on that lumpy, rock-hard, good-for-nothing-but-a-backache sofa-not after this!
Gently, yet willfully, Nino pulled the man over to the bed, ignoring it as his tremors increased. He pulled back the covers, set him between the sheets, and then pulled them up to his chin. He then smoothed the covers, finishing the tucking-in process. The cloth vibrated under his fingertips, the man under it rigid. His shaking seemed endless…
“Sleep,” Nino urged him, his voice hushed, “I’m right here. I’m not gonna hurt you.”
The man’s eyes flickered up to his, to see if the words were true. Nino smiled warmly, and brushed the hair from them.
“I mean it. I would never lie to you.”
Hesitantly, nervously, Ohno closed his eyes. It took a long time, in which Nino uttered reassuring nonsense, all the while patting his head as if he was a child, not a man. Eventually, his body relaxed and his breathing deepened in sleep. Nino continued to play with his hair, marveling at the beauty of him. Indeed, despite the horrific bruises covering him from head to toe, he was, unmistakably, beautiful. His face especially, especially when it was so unguarded in sleep, was like that of an angel’s.
An angel such as this did not deserve the hell he had been thrown into. And now that he was under Nino’s charge…Nino would do whatever it took to restore his wings. His friend hadn’t given him a slave, he realized, but a cause. Out of months of depriving himself of love and wallowing in his misfortune, in the betrayal that his previous boyfriend had dumped on him (upon dumping him), his friend had thrust purpose back into his life. A reason to love again. He hadn’t thought…he never thought it could happen.
But this man. This man needed him. Needed his love. It was his duty-as a master-to give it to him.
Even if it was painful for him-even if it brought back bittersweet memories-Nino would try. Regardless of how badly he wanted to just curl up and brood the rest of his life away-he would try. Surely this man would appreciate his help, in ways that Koichi never could.
Nino would show him love. He would.
---
Next Chapter