(no subject)
I love working for the Church, but the general (and in more cases than not, the specific cases as well) attitude and ignorant, prideful and blatantly selfish behaviors at my parish of employment is a complete embarrassment to the faith and the Archdiocese. I am embarrassed to admit that I even work there. Never have I seen such self-centered, selfish, out-and-out rude, and ignorant behavior -- in particular from a group of people who profess to be in ministry and active, practicing Catholic Christians. I am thoroughly fed up; angry and appalled. It is no wonder that priests lose their fervor -- this parish is certainly attempting to spiritually suck me dry -- and were it not for my home parish and my classes, I would be in a sorry state. I may share the details later -- at this point in time I cannot even find the words to relay what has taken place -- I remain completely appalled and disgusted. Makes you want to throw in the towel and just out and out quit -- were it not for the financial constraints, the desire to provide support to Father, and the need to support my family I would be sorely tempted to do just that. In terms of bringing others to greater faith and knowledge of Jesus Christ, I feel as though my efforts have been completely fruitless.
My professor gave me some good advice this evening, which I shall put into effect into the near future and the chips shall fall where they may. It probably won't be pretty, but neither is what is taking place right now. And my spiritual director told me that I am getting burned out from discouragement due to the lack of progress in bringing change to these stagnated people. I am sure he is right. Even though the negative outweighs the positive about ten to one, he told me to comment every day on that which is taking place which is good and holy. Hence the quietness on my part as of late -- so many self-serving behaviors, it is hard to find positive. But here goes: I am very grateful and thankful for our music director, my co-worker, who strives to bring Truth and Light to this parish in spite of constant setbacks and criticism. I am grateful for my classes at the seminary and for my past professor who sent me an email today that brought me hope, and my current professor who is amazingly intelligent, wise and has a terrific sense of humor and humility. My classes bring me great blessings, and my fellow students, mostly seminarians are awesome. I am grateful to my friend who also works in the Church and with whom I can share freely and without reserve. I am grateful for the three priests at my home parish who are dedicated, faithful, obedient and all around inspirational role models. I am grateful for our previous associate pastor who has moved on to a new parish but who gave of his time, though quite busy I am sure, to preside at a Mass where there was need -- for God's people. Again, true dedication to the faith and his calling, which brings me hope.
And lastly, I am grateful for my children and so proud of Jennifer who received Division I ratings in all three of her competitions last Saturday.
I pray that if it is God's will He send me to a new parish very soon, and if it is not His will, may I find the strength to persevere and to not succumb to discouragement and dryness, but rather keep connected to those things at my home parish and in the greater Archdiocese which keep me hope-filled, faith-filled and growing so that in all I do I may bring glory to our Lord.
I spent some time in the Chapel at the seminary after class -- how I need more time in prayer to find strength and peace in the face of this challenge.
My professor gave me some good advice this evening, which I shall put into effect into the near future and the chips shall fall where they may. It probably won't be pretty, but neither is what is taking place right now. And my spiritual director told me that I am getting burned out from discouragement due to the lack of progress in bringing change to these stagnated people. I am sure he is right. Even though the negative outweighs the positive about ten to one, he told me to comment every day on that which is taking place which is good and holy. Hence the quietness on my part as of late -- so many self-serving behaviors, it is hard to find positive. But here goes: I am very grateful and thankful for our music director, my co-worker, who strives to bring Truth and Light to this parish in spite of constant setbacks and criticism. I am grateful for my classes at the seminary and for my past professor who sent me an email today that brought me hope, and my current professor who is amazingly intelligent, wise and has a terrific sense of humor and humility. My classes bring me great blessings, and my fellow students, mostly seminarians are awesome. I am grateful to my friend who also works in the Church and with whom I can share freely and without reserve. I am grateful for the three priests at my home parish who are dedicated, faithful, obedient and all around inspirational role models. I am grateful for our previous associate pastor who has moved on to a new parish but who gave of his time, though quite busy I am sure, to preside at a Mass where there was need -- for God's people. Again, true dedication to the faith and his calling, which brings me hope.
And lastly, I am grateful for my children and so proud of Jennifer who received Division I ratings in all three of her competitions last Saturday.
I pray that if it is God's will He send me to a new parish very soon, and if it is not His will, may I find the strength to persevere and to not succumb to discouragement and dryness, but rather keep connected to those things at my home parish and in the greater Archdiocese which keep me hope-filled, faith-filled and growing so that in all I do I may bring glory to our Lord.
I spent some time in the Chapel at the seminary after class -- how I need more time in prayer to find strength and peace in the face of this challenge.