Never Never Land Chapter 25
Tim sat in the cold darkness on the side of the road and thought. Everything seemed to spin out from this moment like an intricate silken web. One decision and everything would change resulting in new paths, new futures and new possibilities the results of which he could never anticipate.
Would he hide from his life? Would he run away or would he face it head on and take the good and the bad? Now that it was all down to him what sort of man was he?
Even as he considered leaving all the pain behind, he knew there was no option for him. Not really. The silent minutes calmly wrapped him in a chill embrace and he watched as his breath fogged into a small white cloud before dissipating into the air.
He had felt the fear of the fate that might wait for him in Washington and now sitting in the calm quietness on the other side he knew he had to return.
He couldn’t hide out in the cupboard under the stairs nor could he hand the decisions for his life over to Gibbs’s strong hand. If he wanted to carve a new life and any happiness out of his future then he would face to face whatever the future held for him.
With a deep sigh he turned and looked at Gibbs who smiled softly at him, the darkness softening the weary, tired lines on his face.
“Ready to go back?” Gibbs asked and Tim frowned before he gave Gibbs a gentle punch on the arm.
“Hey! What’s that for?” Gibbs pretended mock outrage even as a smile graced his face.
“That’s for knowing what I’m thinking before I do”
Tony grinned at Gibbs and nodded in firm agreement “Yeah. It is really annoying. You could at least pretend to be surprised when we make the decision you know we are going to make.”
Tim stood before hauling Tony to his feet and pulling him into a warm hug. He gave Tony a manly thump on the back before whispering into his ear.
“Thanks for chasing me.”
“Thanks for not running far”
Tim snorted at Tony’s glib response and released him with a playful push.
Tony found himself grinning as everything seemed to settle back into something that he could recognize. They were the three musketeers again. Just them against the rest of the world. And when they were together they were the best.
********************************************************************
The three men started the walk back to the car through the quiet stillness, their footsteps crunching on the gravel. Tony hopped precariously from one foot to another as he tried to remove the gravel that seemed to have lodged itself in his shoes while Gibbs frowned at the popping sounds his knees had made after too long sitting on the cold hard ground. Tim just pulled his thin jacket closer around him and walked determinedly back towards the flashing hazard lights which pierced the night.
It was time to face his fate.
************************************************************
Vance turned and acknowledged the entrance of the three men into MTAC with a curt nod of his head before returning his gaze to the large screen in front of him. He started speaking giving them a brief sit rep even as his eyes darted from one image on the screen to another.
“A recon team has already gone in and retrieved Agent Jefferson. He’s hurt but alive and they are on route to the hospital as we speak.
Demands for surrender have been issued but they are showing no signs of walking out under a white flag. They are still spouting rhetoric about creating a new order of the faithful once the Government and its private militia have fallen.”
“Private Militia?” Gibbs frowned as he strode down the ramp to stand beside Vance.
“We believe they are referring to us Gibbs. Or more specifically all the Federal Agencies. Apparently we are all corrupt and we are suppressing the free will of the people. ”
Blue Leader we have movement on the south side. They are planning something…
Go…Go…..Green Leader we have the perimeter….
The voices of the different teams crackled into life and the screen showed the heat signatures of dozens of people as they converged onto the large industrial warehouse.
Get out NOW! Go Go! They have multiple incendiaries wired to….
Suddenly a huge flare of light exploded across the screen and the screen blanked out for a second in a scream of static.
“Get communications back up NOW!”
Vance barked as Gibbs stood in the wash of electric light beside him, his hands clenched into fists at his side.
The bank of technicians scrambled to reconnect the link and re establish communications.
Tony slipped his hand over Tim’s in the darkness and squeezed it hard, offering his non verbal support. Tim hung onto the warmth and strength Tony offered as the seconds seemed to stretch into hours.
With a screech of sound the screen leapt suddenly back to life causing everyone to jump at the sudden carnage looming over them. Flames leapt and exploded, tearing flesh from bone as waves of heat and force rolled out from the warehouse towards the advancing teams.
Get down! Get down!
Red leader? Red leader did you get your people out in time?
Blue Two, watch this side in case it’s a distraction. Blue three circle around the front.
This is Red leader. We have some injured but no fatalities. I repeat no fatalities.
Oh Jesus. They’re burning! Get them on the ground. NOW!
Medic!
Drag them if you have to just get them away from the building. It’s not secure
Tim felt numb as he watched several figures stagger from out of the blue flames of the warehouse to collapse on the ground, shrieking and burning. Dozens of darker shapes swarmed over them, attempting to smother the flames and drag them away from the sizzling heat.
It seemed like a familiar video game through the distancing lens of the big screen but he knew there were people underneath the rippling orange and blue white lights.
He had seen enough of damaged corpses to know what was happening. Flesh was splitting, swelling, bursting under the heat as screams of agony pierced the air. Clothing was torn away from skin as it smoked and burned, melting and converging with the substance it was meant to protect.
Figures scattered and ran, converging on the lights until they flickered and died, dropping to the ground as they were smothered under foam and blankets. Shouted orders continued back and forth from the assault teams, the static crackling and setting hair on end.
Gibbs watched as the vision on the screen split and changed as it incorporated video from different groups. The side of the warehouse as the heat exploded the windows outwards, a smoking melted corpse wearing what might have been sneakers it’s hands twisted up skywards as it lay in the dirt, the smoke stained face of a team leader as he accounted for his troops.
Tim stared at the screen until he finally remembered to blink. And suddenly the world rushed into focus again and he sucked in a deep breath, realizing that he had been holding it for the last few endless minutes.
It seemed within moments the entire warehouse was an inferno surrounded by security forces who withdrew to a safe distance from the devouring, joyful flames.
Director Morrow Sir? This is Green leader. They appear to all be dead Sir. Warehouse was completely surrounded and I don’t believe anyone could withstand that heat. The few that managed to run burnt to death and it looks like the rest are scattered in pieces from the force of the initial explosion. They knew it was over. They hadn’t planned on being taken alive.
Tim stared at the flames in shock and Tony slid his arm across his shoulders and together they watched the warehouse burn.
*****************************************************************************
Gibbs nudged Tony in concern and then tilted his chin in Tim’s direction where he sat, still unmoving watching the huge screen and the strange drama unfold.
Tony nodded and sauntered over casually.
“Hey McGee. It’s late and the cleanup crew is going to be there a while. Do you want to go get something to eat?”
Tim blinked his dry eyes a few times, feeling like somehow he was far away from Tony somehow even though he was right in front of him.
“I think I just want to go home” His voice sounded strange to his own ears
“Do you want company?”
“No Tony thanks. I..think I just want to be alone for a while”
“If you’re sure….”
“Yeah I will be fine.”
“Ok well if you want someone to share a beer and a pizza with you, I’m only a phone call away.”
Tony tried to smile encouragingly and keep his tone light but his eyes conveyed his concern.
“Thanks Tony.”
Tim still felt numb as he finally flopped down onto his familiar bed. It seemed strange that everything in his apartment was untouched from that morning when he had packed his bag to head to Never Never Land with Tony and Gibbs. Everything had changed since then but nothing had altered physically. His cereal bowl was still washed and sitting next to his sink. His typewriter still had paper sitting in it where it had sat untouched for months on his desk. A neat stack of mail waited patiently to be opened by his front door.
But everything had changed.
They were dead. All of them were dead and he would never have to look at them from across a courtroom. Their screams of pain and terror were still ringing in his ears and he wasn’t sure if he was horrified at himself or grateful that their last moments were filled with such tortuous pain.
He saw their charred bodies and dismembered bodies littered in pieces. Saw them tagged and photographed before being removed from the scene for identification. He saw the heavy black body bags unzipped and filled with the remains of the men he hated and loathed most in the world.
They were gone. They were dead.
And he was still alive.
Did he feel better knowing that they died slowly as their flesh burned off their bones fueled by chemical accelerant? Or was he just glad that it was over? That they couldn’t hurt anyone else? Or was he pleased that he would never again have to wake up in the middle of the night dripping with sweat and wondering if they might somehow find him again?
They were GONE
They were DEAD
And he was still ALIVE
Tim lay fully clothed on his bed and stared at the ceiling feeling the regret and anger ebb and flow through him like a healing tide washing away the shame until as dawn finally rose he fell into an exhausted dreamless sleep.
*********************************************************************
Tony sighed as he lay on Gibbs’s bare chest unable to sleep. Gibbs dropped a kiss into his hair and ran his hand soothingly up and down his naked back.
“He’s going to be fine Tony. He just needs some time that’s all. You know Tim, he has to think it all through in his head first. But when he has filed it all away, he’s going to be ok. Now try and get some sleep. We will go see how he is in the morning”
Tony nodded, his eyes drooping as he listened to the steady calming beat of Gibbs’ heart. Tim was going to be fine. Gibbs had said so. Tim was going to be fine and they would go back to work and everything would be…
Tony slept.
Gibbs lay in the darkness of his bedroom and stared unseen at the ceiling. As the hours past he silently rejoiced in the images of the charred corpses of the men who had hurt his youngest boy until dawn finally heralded a new day. Slowly he unclentched his fist until it lay relaxed against the covers. There would be no need for his sniper rifle this time.
Would he hide from his life? Would he run away or would he face it head on and take the good and the bad? Now that it was all down to him what sort of man was he?
Even as he considered leaving all the pain behind, he knew there was no option for him. Not really. The silent minutes calmly wrapped him in a chill embrace and he watched as his breath fogged into a small white cloud before dissipating into the air.
He had felt the fear of the fate that might wait for him in Washington and now sitting in the calm quietness on the other side he knew he had to return.
He couldn’t hide out in the cupboard under the stairs nor could he hand the decisions for his life over to Gibbs’s strong hand. If he wanted to carve a new life and any happiness out of his future then he would face to face whatever the future held for him.
With a deep sigh he turned and looked at Gibbs who smiled softly at him, the darkness softening the weary, tired lines on his face.
“Ready to go back?” Gibbs asked and Tim frowned before he gave Gibbs a gentle punch on the arm.
“Hey! What’s that for?” Gibbs pretended mock outrage even as a smile graced his face.
“That’s for knowing what I’m thinking before I do”
Tony grinned at Gibbs and nodded in firm agreement “Yeah. It is really annoying. You could at least pretend to be surprised when we make the decision you know we are going to make.”
Tim stood before hauling Tony to his feet and pulling him into a warm hug. He gave Tony a manly thump on the back before whispering into his ear.
“Thanks for chasing me.”
“Thanks for not running far”
Tim snorted at Tony’s glib response and released him with a playful push.
Tony found himself grinning as everything seemed to settle back into something that he could recognize. They were the three musketeers again. Just them against the rest of the world. And when they were together they were the best.
********************************************************************
The three men started the walk back to the car through the quiet stillness, their footsteps crunching on the gravel. Tony hopped precariously from one foot to another as he tried to remove the gravel that seemed to have lodged itself in his shoes while Gibbs frowned at the popping sounds his knees had made after too long sitting on the cold hard ground. Tim just pulled his thin jacket closer around him and walked determinedly back towards the flashing hazard lights which pierced the night.
It was time to face his fate.
************************************************************
Vance turned and acknowledged the entrance of the three men into MTAC with a curt nod of his head before returning his gaze to the large screen in front of him. He started speaking giving them a brief sit rep even as his eyes darted from one image on the screen to another.
“A recon team has already gone in and retrieved Agent Jefferson. He’s hurt but alive and they are on route to the hospital as we speak.
Demands for surrender have been issued but they are showing no signs of walking out under a white flag. They are still spouting rhetoric about creating a new order of the faithful once the Government and its private militia have fallen.”
“Private Militia?” Gibbs frowned as he strode down the ramp to stand beside Vance.
“We believe they are referring to us Gibbs. Or more specifically all the Federal Agencies. Apparently we are all corrupt and we are suppressing the free will of the people. ”
Blue Leader we have movement on the south side. They are planning something…
Go…Go…..Green Leader we have the perimeter….
The voices of the different teams crackled into life and the screen showed the heat signatures of dozens of people as they converged onto the large industrial warehouse.
Get out NOW! Go Go! They have multiple incendiaries wired to….
Suddenly a huge flare of light exploded across the screen and the screen blanked out for a second in a scream of static.
“Get communications back up NOW!”
Vance barked as Gibbs stood in the wash of electric light beside him, his hands clenched into fists at his side.
The bank of technicians scrambled to reconnect the link and re establish communications.
Tony slipped his hand over Tim’s in the darkness and squeezed it hard, offering his non verbal support. Tim hung onto the warmth and strength Tony offered as the seconds seemed to stretch into hours.
With a screech of sound the screen leapt suddenly back to life causing everyone to jump at the sudden carnage looming over them. Flames leapt and exploded, tearing flesh from bone as waves of heat and force rolled out from the warehouse towards the advancing teams.
Get down! Get down!
Red leader? Red leader did you get your people out in time?
Blue Two, watch this side in case it’s a distraction. Blue three circle around the front.
This is Red leader. We have some injured but no fatalities. I repeat no fatalities.
Oh Jesus. They’re burning! Get them on the ground. NOW!
Medic!
Drag them if you have to just get them away from the building. It’s not secure
Tim felt numb as he watched several figures stagger from out of the blue flames of the warehouse to collapse on the ground, shrieking and burning. Dozens of darker shapes swarmed over them, attempting to smother the flames and drag them away from the sizzling heat.
It seemed like a familiar video game through the distancing lens of the big screen but he knew there were people underneath the rippling orange and blue white lights.
He had seen enough of damaged corpses to know what was happening. Flesh was splitting, swelling, bursting under the heat as screams of agony pierced the air. Clothing was torn away from skin as it smoked and burned, melting and converging with the substance it was meant to protect.
Figures scattered and ran, converging on the lights until they flickered and died, dropping to the ground as they were smothered under foam and blankets. Shouted orders continued back and forth from the assault teams, the static crackling and setting hair on end.
Gibbs watched as the vision on the screen split and changed as it incorporated video from different groups. The side of the warehouse as the heat exploded the windows outwards, a smoking melted corpse wearing what might have been sneakers it’s hands twisted up skywards as it lay in the dirt, the smoke stained face of a team leader as he accounted for his troops.
Tim stared at the screen until he finally remembered to blink. And suddenly the world rushed into focus again and he sucked in a deep breath, realizing that he had been holding it for the last few endless minutes.
It seemed within moments the entire warehouse was an inferno surrounded by security forces who withdrew to a safe distance from the devouring, joyful flames.
Director Morrow Sir? This is Green leader. They appear to all be dead Sir. Warehouse was completely surrounded and I don’t believe anyone could withstand that heat. The few that managed to run burnt to death and it looks like the rest are scattered in pieces from the force of the initial explosion. They knew it was over. They hadn’t planned on being taken alive.
Tim stared at the flames in shock and Tony slid his arm across his shoulders and together they watched the warehouse burn.
*****************************************************************************
Gibbs nudged Tony in concern and then tilted his chin in Tim’s direction where he sat, still unmoving watching the huge screen and the strange drama unfold.
Tony nodded and sauntered over casually.
“Hey McGee. It’s late and the cleanup crew is going to be there a while. Do you want to go get something to eat?”
Tim blinked his dry eyes a few times, feeling like somehow he was far away from Tony somehow even though he was right in front of him.
“I think I just want to go home” His voice sounded strange to his own ears
“Do you want company?”
“No Tony thanks. I..think I just want to be alone for a while”
“If you’re sure….”
“Yeah I will be fine.”
“Ok well if you want someone to share a beer and a pizza with you, I’m only a phone call away.”
Tony tried to smile encouragingly and keep his tone light but his eyes conveyed his concern.
“Thanks Tony.”
Tim still felt numb as he finally flopped down onto his familiar bed. It seemed strange that everything in his apartment was untouched from that morning when he had packed his bag to head to Never Never Land with Tony and Gibbs. Everything had changed since then but nothing had altered physically. His cereal bowl was still washed and sitting next to his sink. His typewriter still had paper sitting in it where it had sat untouched for months on his desk. A neat stack of mail waited patiently to be opened by his front door.
But everything had changed.
They were dead. All of them were dead and he would never have to look at them from across a courtroom. Their screams of pain and terror were still ringing in his ears and he wasn’t sure if he was horrified at himself or grateful that their last moments were filled with such tortuous pain.
He saw their charred bodies and dismembered bodies littered in pieces. Saw them tagged and photographed before being removed from the scene for identification. He saw the heavy black body bags unzipped and filled with the remains of the men he hated and loathed most in the world.
They were gone. They were dead.
And he was still alive.
Did he feel better knowing that they died slowly as their flesh burned off their bones fueled by chemical accelerant? Or was he just glad that it was over? That they couldn’t hurt anyone else? Or was he pleased that he would never again have to wake up in the middle of the night dripping with sweat and wondering if they might somehow find him again?
They were GONE
They were DEAD
And he was still ALIVE
Tim lay fully clothed on his bed and stared at the ceiling feeling the regret and anger ebb and flow through him like a healing tide washing away the shame until as dawn finally rose he fell into an exhausted dreamless sleep.
*********************************************************************
Tony sighed as he lay on Gibbs’s bare chest unable to sleep. Gibbs dropped a kiss into his hair and ran his hand soothingly up and down his naked back.
“He’s going to be fine Tony. He just needs some time that’s all. You know Tim, he has to think it all through in his head first. But when he has filed it all away, he’s going to be ok. Now try and get some sleep. We will go see how he is in the morning”
Tony nodded, his eyes drooping as he listened to the steady calming beat of Gibbs’ heart. Tim was going to be fine. Gibbs had said so. Tim was going to be fine and they would go back to work and everything would be…
Tony slept.
Gibbs lay in the darkness of his bedroom and stared unseen at the ceiling. As the hours past he silently rejoiced in the images of the charred corpses of the men who had hurt his youngest boy until dawn finally heralded a new day. Slowly he unclentched his fist until it lay relaxed against the covers. There would be no need for his sniper rifle this time.