my therapy
wow. . I haven't posted in this biznite in like a year....adrien will be two this month, and I'm planning this amazing pirate party. I'm in school...pre med and nursing kill me. I got all cute for mickey to come by tonight, but he didn't (not that he even said that he would). Him spending time with Adrien makes me like him again, and he pushes me away, because he wants to redeem himself and be a good dad first. Sigh. The two guys that I've dated in the past two years have been calling even though I said to lose my number....but it stills feel good. The last guy made me feel so good about myself, complimenting me every second. I walked around like I was the queen bee. Now that he's gone, I just eat a lot more..heh..I'm sort of lonely. Maybe that's apparent by my putting on "Yo Gabba Gabba", fixing a glass of wine, and reading my old livejournal entries. I wish that I could get over this lonely thing and be happy with me and my lil man. I want to call some friends and tell them to come over and pop some bottles with me(i'm not an alchi...i just have my glass of wine for the cardio benefits....wow my post is boring) , but I dont' call them, because I don't want to bring them down from a fun party life to come chill with my butt. Still same old me...listening to tupac(hushed so that Adrien doesn't hear the cussing), drinking(although wine and not boon'es farm), and longing for a man who's still a boy. It feels good to write this though, because I know that after, I'll be chipper again. I really do have a wonderful life. I just wish that I had more people to share it with.